I did a deal with God

[Bluey]

Ye as daft as that sounds I did a deal with someone I don't even believe exists.

See I take my mums dog out every day why she is at work. He has a better life then me. He goes to agility every week and fly ball every week and is even going to be a patter dog for the elderly and the ppl in hospital. my mum and dad take him on a good 2 hour walk every night. I enjoy he's company in the day as well. He really is a pretty amazing dog and really intelligent.

He has been poorly all weekend. So yesterday I took him to the vets with my mum. The vet told us that he is a very poorly dog and there is something wrong with he's hart. Even if he pulls fro he well not be able to do agility or fly ball or anything active again. He's only 3 years old.

I had to stand there and watch my mum cry her eyes out in the vets. This dog really he's her hole world.

So considering all this and that he makes my mum happy and that he has a better life then me. I said a prayer for the fist time in many many years last night. I asked God to give him he's health back and take me to night instead. But no, this has not happend. I am also seat here in quite a lot of physical pain as I have a pain in my back as I sometimes get. Just took some pain killers but they have not kicked in yet.

I don't see the point in all this. I am just but a living thing and my body is messed and I well never be happy for as long as I live with what I have. Then you get the happiest dog in the world, again just another living thing but this living thing is happy. So what is the point of him not living and me being forced to stay here. The world is messed up, there is not God. I well never pry again for the rest of my life if this dog is not going to be how he was. There is no point, cos if he goes and stays as he is then this well give me all the final prof I need that there is no God and if there is he most be as twisted and as messed up as all the rest of us.

I love you mate

 

[Unacceptance]

Aw man, sad to hear Bluey.

A dogmatic quandary shouldn't affect the way you live.

Honestly I see death as a reason of celebration, I know it sounds morbid. If you think life is a test though, sounds like he passed with flying colors. Remember the good times and keep him alive where it counts, in your mind.

 

[Bluey]

I see death as something to be celebrated as well. But in old age, and in animals/ppl that are in pain. Its not something to be celebrated when a living animal in there prime gets taken away like this. Its just a joke. Well he's still here for now. There doing moor tests to day but its not looking good.

I am glad for any old person or animal (The same thing to me. where all living) that passers away when there never going to be happy again cos there old. But this. This is just another messed up chapter that makes no since to me.

 

[Unacceptance]

What you're telling me is people need to suffer in decrepitude of old age before you are happy they are gone.

How often do I hear guys saying they want to die in the middle of doing drugs or during climax when having sex because there isn't a better way to go that when you are at the top Who wants to die in the pits? That's the final insult. What you should be doing if there is any potential suffering is to shower the dog with affection and making it the most kick ass time he could hope for. Get him food normal dogs only dream of, play games that he CAN play until even he gets bored. Make it an easy good bye. Takes strength but really you think the dog wants to go knowing he left and causing a whole family anguish?

 

[Naleena]

((((((((((((((((((((((Bluey))))))))))))))))))))))))
I am sooo very sorry to hear about your mom's dog and that you are in pain. But ya know what? I am sure mom would cry much harder if you left instead. I will be thinking of you today.

 

[GHOSTNYOURMIST]

Sorry to hear about your dog dude. (BIG MANLY HUG)
I lost a dog a couple of years ago, I had him for 13 years, he was my best friend. The nieghbor got a dog about the same time as I did, my dog lived like a king, his dog was tied to a tree and all but forgot about, my dog went on long hikes with me and rode around in my truck or boat and his dog stayed tied to the tree and had no life at all, my dog died of brain cancer with voilent seizures until I finally had him put to sleep. My nieghbors dog is still alive and has spent his whole life on an 8 foot chain with no love at all.
It doesn't seem fair, but I know my dog had a great life.
I also lost 2 loved ones around the same time, believe me when I say it is much harder to lose a loved one. But I know what you mean about things being screwed up, my grandfather laid on his back while cancer ate a hole in his back the size of a football. He was totaly paralized and was feed through a tube, He didn't know anyone and was in so much pain, if he was a dog they would have given him a shot and he would have just went to sleep but instead he laid there for over 6 months.
I learned that life isn't always fair.
You just have to make the best of what you're given.
Hang in there Dude! I'd have really missed you if God had made that trade.

 

[jales]

death is good

but so is life...
I've never lost a dog so I dont know how you feel, but for now it might make sense to just try and enjoy your time with him.

Bluey life is an amazing thing, for most people it isnt perfect. For some people it's worse than others..but you know how they say the only thing constant in life is change.. if you are sad now.. then that saying is a good thing because it means that hopefully you wont be sad forever.


Youre life is in no way meaningless and not something to use to bargain with God. You mean a lot to this community and to your family; I am sure. Sometimes you are in pain, but I've found that emotional pain is a lot worse than physical (even though physical is very bad)..

And just like you can take pain killers for your phyiscal pain, there are ways of changing your life so that you dont reach a point of server emotional pain.
If you do often find yourself feeling like you will never be happy and that life is not worth living then I genuinely think that the way you think and live needs to change. If you dont agree then..yes..maybe I dont know what I'm talking about.. because after all it is your life.

But simple changes in your life; like fostering good friendships, finding something to give you a sense of purpose, explorering your thoughts about life and happiness, and a few more stuff can change the way you experience life.

and the way you experience life..to me .. is the most important thing that exist.
Also I'm so sorry about your dog, but if death is a good thing to you...maybe his life is still perfect.

 

[Bluey]

What you're telling me is people need to suffer in decrepitude of old age before you are happy they are gone.

No no, That's not what am saying. I was just trying to say that if he had lived a good long life then I would be happy for him.

This is about the only time you well probably see me post with emotion rather then logic. I Guss am just a bit upset and worried with the way he is. He still at the vets and I hope its good news but its not looking like it well be

How often do I hear guys saying they want to die in the middle of doing drugs or during climax when having sex because there isn't a better way to go that when you are at the top Who wants to die in the pits? That's the final insult. What you should be doing if there is any potential suffering is to shower the dog with affection and making it the most kick ass time he could hope for. Get him food normal dogs only dream of, play games that he CAN play until even he gets bored. Make it an easy good bye. Takes strength but really you think the dog wants to go knowing he left and causing a whole family anguish?

I hear you man, Don't worry we had him last night and I never stopped fussing over him. He's not eating but he does normally get food that most other dogs could only dream off anyway.

 

[Bluey]

((((((((((((((((((((((Bluey))))))))))))))))))))))))
I am sooo very sorry to hear about your mom's dog and that you are in pain. But ya know what? I am sure mom would cry much harder if you left instead. I will be thinking of you today.

Ye, I am sure she would as well. This is probably why am still here anyway. But it dose not mean that he would not have a better life then me. But anyway that prayer was a stupid thing that I did.

Thanks for the HUGS

 

[Bluey]

Sorry to hear about your dog dude. (BIG MANLY HUG)

Thanks dude,

I lost a dog a couple of years ago, I had him for 13 years, he was my best friend. The nieghbor got a dog about the same time as I did, my dog lived like a king, his dog was tied to a tree and all but forgot about, my dog went on long hikes with me and rode around in my truck or boat and his dog stayed tied to the tree and had no life at all, my dog died of brain cancer with voilent seizures until I finally had him put to sleep. My nieghbors dog is still alive and has spent his whole life on an 8 foot chain with no love at all.
It doesn't seem fair, but I know my dog had a great life.

There is some jerks around that should not be allowed to keep pets.

I here some guy near me as put things out near he's garden that is poisoners to animals. If it comes back that he was poisoned I well not be held responsible for my actions. I well seriously be getting myself into some trouble.

I had a dog that I was 2 weeks older then and she lived tell I was 17. she was the best thing out of my childhood and I still love her to bits and always well. It was hurtful when she went but I did understand she was 17 and she had a good life. So I was happy for her. With this one its different. We rescued him from a rescue center when he was a year and a half. He had been hit around a bit as well. But he dose have the most amazing temperament you have ever seen. He has only had like not even 2 years of a good life and now this. Its just so unfair.

I also lost 2 loved ones around the same time, believe me when I say it is much harder to lose a loved one. But I know what you mean about things being screwed up, my grandfather laid on his back while cancer ate a hole in his back the size of a football. He was totaly paralized and was feed through a tube, He didn't know anyone and was in so much pain, if he was a dog they would have given him a shot and he would have just went to sleep but instead he laid there for over 6 months.
I learned that life isn't always fair.

I am so sorry to hear this. I would had thought you would feel like kicking me up the ass when am complaining about it being unfair. You are right though. Cos he is a dog they can put him to sleep and then at lest he's not in pain and he well be in a better place.

cancer is evil. It is the reason I gave up smoking. I don't mined dying but I don't want to die in pain and for a long time like that.

I know life is not fair. Its just never nice to be reminded of that. Not you BTW, I just mean with this that's happend.

You know I think what you have said here is what I needed to hear. Not what I wonted to hear, But I do think I needed to hear it. kinder puts things back into perspective.

You just have to make the best of what you're given.
Hang in there Dude! I'd have really missed you if God had made that trade.

You do have to make the best out of what you have. This is true.

And what ever happens all carry on as be for. Have no choice so might as well make the best out of it. what is most frustrating is there is nothing I can do. Like everything that hurts in life there is never nothing I could have done or can do to make it better. Is allows things that can not be controlled or stopped. That what frustrates me.

 

[Bluey]

death is good

but so is life...
I've never lost a dog so I dont know how you feel, but for now it might make sense to just try and enjoy your time with him.

Oh, I have don't worry. And when he gets back out the vets later I well be spending moor time with him. That's if they let him out. they wonted to keep him in yesterday but we said no. Hes better off at home then on hes own there. We never stopped fussing him

Bluey life is an amazing thing, for most people it isnt perfect. For some people it's worse than others..but you know how they say the only thing constant in life is change.. if you are sad now.. then that saying is a good thing because it means that hopefully you wont be sad forever.

I hope, I have felt the way I feel since I was 18 really. I am physically weaker then most guys I know. I have a link up in my profile for anyone that's interested in my health. I have never been happy with the way it is and never well be. I do always try to make the best out of it through.

Youre life is in no way meaningless and not something to use to bargain with God. You mean a lot to this community and to your family; I am sure. Sometimes you are in pain, but I've found that emotional pain is a lot worse than physical (even though physical is very bad)..

I think my life is mine to bargain with in however way I see fit. Its mine after all. the only thing I did wrong here is I bargained with something that's make believe.

I think being apart of this community means moor to me then it dose to anyone else. this place well be here with or without me just the same as anything else well be. Not that am going anywhere lol. I realized a long time ago now that doing myself in was one thing I would never have the bottle to do. So know I never think about that. Doesn't mean I have to be happy with the way things are tho. All though since I have come to the decision that I would never be able to end it all I have been a bit moor happy.

I agree, emotional pain is a lot lot weirs then physical pain. I still do have the pain in my back. I have taken something for it and its now bearable. I can deal with that. I always have been able to deal with physical pain. Its the emotional honeysuckle that gets me.

And just like you can take pain killers for your phyiscal pain, there are ways of changing your life so that you dont reach a point of server emotional pain.
If you do often find yourself feeling like you will never be happy and that life is not worth living then I genuinely think that the way you think and live needs to change. If you dont agree then..yes..maybe I dont know what I'm talking about.. because after all it is your life.

But simple changes in your life; like fostering good friendships, finding something to give you a sense of purpose, explorering your thoughts about life and happiness, and a few more stuff can change the way you experience life.

and the way you experience life..to me .. is the most important thing that exist.
Also I'm so sorry about your dog, but if death is a good thing to you...maybe his life is still perfect.

jales, We have PM'd a bit and I have allows found you to know what your talking about. I agree that my life needs to change. I have been trying to make it change but I have no idea on what I wont to do with my life. I don't work and if I did I would have no clue what kinder work I could do. I don't ever meet girls that am interested in or them interested in me. Or guys for that matter lol Not that am looking for a guy. But fostering better friendships is what am trying to do. The problem is everyone I meet as friends just wants to drink and go to the pub. If all I wonted to do is drink everyday then I would have the best social life ever.

 

[Bluey]

He just got back from the vets. It looks like he has a problem with he's hart but we wont get the test results back tell Friday. He is a lot better then he has been. so its now looking better for him But well have to Waite and see. He's hart is going to fast and hes got some kinder disease in it. So the vet said that sometimes it goes back OK after rest and sometimes not. So all we can do is hope it gets better. The vet did say it wasn't good yesterday tho so this is a bit of a turn around. Plus he's like 10X better with in himself.

So maybe I should stop being such a soft sod huh Well back to the logical thinking Bluey.

 

[ringwood]

He just got back from the vets. It looks like he has a problem with he's hart but we wont get the test results back tell Friday. He is a lot better then he has been. so its now looking better for him But well have to Waite and see. He's hart is going to fast and hes got some kinder disease in it. So the vet said that sometimes it goes back OK after rest and sometimes not. So all we can do is hope it gets better. The vet did say it wasn't good yesterday tho so this is a bit of a turn around. Plus he's like 10X better with in himself.

So maybe I should stop being such a soft sod huh Well back to the logical thinking Bluey.

Hey...I'm new here, but I was just reading this post and I wanted to send out big hugs to you... I feel for you, sweetie. And I'm really glad your dog seems a little better today...That's all you can do - take it day by day, and give the little guy all the love you can possibly shower on him...Cause that's what it's all about in this world: love...

 

[Steel]

Hey Bluey

Just want to wish you and your Mum's dog all the best, and I really hope things work out.

TC

 

[scotsgirl]

Hi there Bluey, read your post and wanted you to know your in my thoughts.
I haven't posted for a while, life has been hectic but good. I have got myself involved with a Labrador rescue charity and it has been so good for me. I foster dogs until they are rehomed (new homes are vetted) and help with fundraising.
Just now I am fostering a 3 year old dog called Max. His owner stubbed out his fag ends on max's body. You know what amazes me? Max loves and trusts humans, after all he's been through he still has that.
I hope your wee fella comes good and if not he has known love and care, so many don't and never even a kind word.
You also know my main job is caring for the elderly in a nursing home. It's heartbreaking at times. Care has become business and business is money. "Heads on beds" is the saying that's used. there are many instances of peope reaching the end of their life where nature is going to take it's course. But no, we intervene, give them high energy drinks and keep them going. Often taking away their dignity and in my opinion their rights, but it's dementia patients so it's not black and white. I hear so many people saying I will do away with myself before I get like that, but I bet three quarters of the people I care for said that. When it comes to the nitty gritty survival is a very strong instinct.
Sorry if I have diversed and gone off topic, but for obvious reasons your post touched my heart. You are a kind genuine person Bluey, makes me sad to think of you sad. xxxxx

 

[Bluey]

He just got back from the vets. It looks like he has a problem with he's hart but we wont get the test results back tell Friday. He is a lot better then he has been. so its now looking better for him But well have to Waite and see. He's hart is going to fast and hes got some kinder disease in it. So the vet said that sometimes it goes back OK after rest and sometimes not. So all we can do is hope it gets better. The vet did say it wasn't good yesterday tho so this is a bit of a turn around. Plus he's like 10X better with in himself.

So maybe I should stop being such a soft sod huh Well back to the logical thinking Bluey.

Hey...I'm new here, but I was just reading this post and I wanted to send out big hugs to you... I feel for you, sweetie. And I'm really glad your dog seems a little better today...That's all you can do - take it day by day, and give the little guy all the love you can possibly shower on him...Cause that's what it's all about in this world: love...

We are taking it day by day Your so right. It don't matter whither you live for a day or a 100 years. just as long as there was love in that day

 

[Bluey]

Hey Bluey

Just want to wish you and your Mum's dog all the best, and I really hope things work out.

TC

Thanks mate I hope he is going to be fine. He has the best chance ever with he's family that's looking after him. And you don't want to know how much looking after him cost. but he's worth it.

 

[Airbug]

Hey Bluey, hope your dog will be fine again.
I had to put my dog to sleep when I was 14. I remember I was alone the evening and I had to cry badly. The only thing I got left is the attached picture which I took when I got my first camera (actually the flipside says May 1990) and the leash's carabiner (which is still attached to my key-ring). My dog got actually very old but I don't think that an young life is more worth than an old life.
And the same way I don't believe that life is only worth living if you are enduringly happy. I believe that life is worth living, even if the only short happy moment appears to be two minutes before you die. You never know what will happen next. Its now about one year ago that I got through the deepest depressions in my life. And today I am more happy than I have ever been in my life. I could never imagine this could happen. I had given up myself totally.
Don't give up. Life is strange, but life is good. Even if you can't see it now.

 

[Bluey]

Hi there Bluey, read your post and wanted you to know your in my thoughts.
I haven't posted for a while, life has been hectic but good. I have got myself involved with a Labrador rescue charity and it has been so good for me. I foster dogs until they are rehomed (new homes are vetted) and help with fundraising.
Just now I am fostering a 3 year old dog called Max. His owner stubbed out his fag ends on max's body. You know what amazes me? Max loves and trusts humans, after all he's been through he still has that.
I hope your wee fella comes good and if not he has known love and care, so many don't and never even a kind word.
You also know my main job is caring for the elderly in a nursing home. It's heartbreaking at times. Care has become business and business is money. "Heads on beds" is the saying that's used. there are many instances of peope reaching the end of their life where nature is going to take it's course. But no, we intervene, give them high energy drinks and keep them going. Often taking away their dignity and in my opinion their rights, but it's dementia patients so it's not black and white. I hear so many people saying I will do away with myself before I get like that, but I bet three quarters of the people I care for said that. When it comes to the nitty gritty survival is a very strong instinct.
Sorry if I have diversed and gone off topic, but for obvious reasons your post touched my heart. You are a kind genuine person Bluey, makes me sad to think of you sad. xxxxx

Heads on beds this is the world we live in when even in death ppl are out to get as much as they can from us. You know my grandma was berried with her wedding ring on by request from herself that, that is what she wonted. but the ppl that lay her out and last she her took it of be for she got berried. They do that to all of them. Now how messed up is that? I know what you mean about the nursing homes. I would not like to go in one. The ppl who work there are under paid and understaffed and that's why the old ones get rushed. Its all about profit. And am not sad no moor. I was getting a little sentimental earlier. Am back to my old self. I think even if on friday its bad news then me and me mum & dad can all rest assured that we gave him the best possible life a dog could have.

Its not that often you well see me post emotionlly like this and say things that's not even that logical. but you know yesterday when I was in the vets I actually felled up myself. I didn't realise how close I was to the stupid dog. But I Guss I do see him every day nearly and I do take him on little walks and play ball with him so am boned to get attached.

 

[Bluey]

Hey Bluey, hope your dog will be fine again.
I had to put my dog to sleep when I was 14. I remember I was alone the evening and I had to cry badly. The only thing I got left is the attached picture which I took when I got my first camera (actually the flipside says May 1990) and the leash's carabiner (which is still attached to my key-ring). My dog got actually very old but I don't think that an young life is more worth than an old life.
And the same way I don't believe that life is only worth living if you are enduringly happy. I believe that life is worth living, even if the only short happy moment appears to be two minutes before you die. You never know what will happen next. Its now about one year ago that I got through the deepest depressions in my life. And today I am more happy than I have ever been in my life. I could never imagine this could happen. I had given up myself totally.
Don't give up. Life is strange, but life is good. Even if you can't see it now.

He's a cute fellow to what you can see. And I think you may be right. If happens only comes for a few years even just be for you go. then Its worth the Wait I Guss.

Am glad your happy Why? You must let me into your secret Well-I think I well be better when I get rid of this pain I have on my back at the minute. I just took some moor meds for it. I don't take tablets very often so when I do they work. But this pain better be gone tomorrow cos its starting to grained me down a bit. I am glad that snoop is looking a bit better tho. just hope that the test results are good come Friday. snoops the dog BTW.