Not an emotional creature

[mr p]

Hey all!
This is my second post, so bear with me please
Anyway, I’m a bit awkward around people—I disregard other’s feelings too often I think. I’m spending more time socializing now than ever before, I feel like an extrovert trapped in an introvert’s mind.
Yeah, I feel ignored. It makes me angry, and sad, but mostly ragingly mad, to the point where I’d actually like to hurt myself. Not in that way, but I wouldn’t hesitate to have a one-on-one bare-hands fight with a clone of myself. I’d seriously love that at times.
The thing about me disregarding others’ feelings probably follows from the premiss that I don’t think I can cause people to feel emotions; I’m just void to them. No one has ever really thought about me when we’re not together, I’ve never been stood up for, and I don't think I can cause girls to feel insecure ("does he like me?", "what if I say something wrong", etc).

The question, then, is why and how to fix this? :/

Thanks for reading!

 

[Badjedidude]

Well, that's a bit vague. I'd probably need to know your story a little better before I could really comment or say anything helpful...so do you have any specific, recent examples? Of interaction with others that you feel went wrong, or of moments when you felt socially awkward or something...?

----Steve

 

[samba101]

Yes I must admit there's not alot of information to go on, like descriptions.

 

[mr p]

Well, that's a bit vague. I'd probably need to know your story a little better before I could really comment or say anything helpful...so do you have any specific, recent examples? Of interaction with others that you feel went wrong, or of moments when you felt socially awkward or something...?

----Steve

Thanks guys for responding! I figured I wouldn't give away too much, because there'd be like a huge wall of text, so I was hoping there'd be enough to draw some conclusions. But alas, there wasn't. Haha, sorry about that! Anyway, I'm not even sure I know what I was talking about; I'm not bad with people really--I'm usually pretty cheery in spite of some rugged edges. I've gained some perspective since I wrote my post and I consider my problems fairly minor now.
The core of my thinking, to be more concise, is that I don't think I can cause other people to feel emotions (good nor bad), which I think is one of the last parts of the puzzle in becoming the person I want to be. This thinking lead me to--at one point--believe I didn't have a personality, though I don't really think that anymore. I still think I'm bland, though. I guess everything is solved by more social contact on a regular basis.

What do I expect of you? Nothing. I don't even have a proper question, so feel free to ignore me or say whatever you feel like!

 

[Despair]

Hi Mr. P

I just wanted you to know that I found your post to be quite provocative. The anger, sorrow, and especially the match with a clone of yourself. I guess your words stir up feelings in me because I relate to what was said and because your post was presented well; the way it is read is passionate. I am the opposite in this regard, with many words that tend to convey cold intellect rather then emotion.

Yes, this reply was mainly a compliment, but there is a catch: I replied because you stated you felt ignored and that you don't make others "feel." Had this not been the subject I might have said nothing and been on my way, despite having a read a good post that made me feel.

I suspect many who have read your posts have gone away feeling and thinking something, they just neglected to tell you about it. It is reasonable to assume that a fair number of people do, and doing so might make you feel a little better inside.

 

[mr p]

Hi Mr. P

I just wanted you to know that I found your post to be quite provocative. The anger, sorrow, and especially the match with a clone of yourself. I guess your words stir up feelings in me because I relate to what was said and because your post was presented well; the way it is read is passionate. I am the opposite in this regard, with many words that tend to convey cold intellect rather then emotion.

Yes, this reply was mainly a compliment, but there is a catch: I replied because you stated you felt ignored and that you don't make others "feel." Had this not been the subject I might have said nothing and been on my way, despite having a read a good post that made me feel.

I suspect many who have read your posts have gone away feeling and thinking something, they just neglected to tell you about it. It is reasonable to assume that a fair number of people do, and doing so might make you feel a little better inside.

Thanks, how nice and considerate of you Maybe it's the same IRL too; people neglect to tell you when you make them feel good. I know I do that, but I'd really like to improve.
Regarding cold intellect vs. emotions, aren't emotions what we're all about here? If I don't try to convey my feelings in what I write, no-one can see if my emotional patterns are abnormal. What I do is very selfish; I throw my feelings at you and hope for any anomalies to be pushed in my face.

I'm happy I caused you to feel things, but it wasn't I that made you feel. It was the text that I wrote.

Ok, that last line doesn't really work, does it. I decided to keep it anyway, to show you how full of ambivalence I am.
There's really no difference between causing emotions through writing, speaking or acting; they're all mediums. It's easier for me in writing because I've read a lot, I know I can get very affected by a good book, song or movie. Conveying emotions by speaking and acting is hard for me because I haven't received enough emotions that way. I think.

 

[Sway]

I'm happy I caused you to feel things, but it wasn't I that made you feel. It was the text that I wrote.

Ok, that last line doesn't really work, does it. I decided to keep it anyway, to show you how full of ambivalence I am.
There's really no difference between causing emotions through writing, speaking or acting; they're all mediums. It's easier for me in writing because I've read a lot, I know I can get very affected by a good book, song or movie. Conveying emotions by speaking and acting is hard for me because I haven't received enough emotions that way. I think.

I think you are just over technical about conveying emotion! I feel on the same wavelength as you guys do about having trouble conveying emotion, but sometimes when you just act and don't think about what you convey emotions NATURALLY.

That's what conveying emotion is pretty much all about, be yourself, don't let stuff bother you, and just don't dwell on it. Eventually you'll make close connections with one or two people, then as you keep on socializing the numbers will just grow. Go out and try your best to connect with ppl, gain some EXP, and level up.