Ok so ur lonely. Are u doing something about?

[Guest]

What are you doing to make friends or you don't do anything at all?
In my case, I'm lonely and I have a mild case of social phobia. Yup it's a double whammy.

 

[Frizbit]

Hrmm... to make friends I usually attend different events around campus, meet one or two people at the events, then meet all of those person's friends in their social circle afterwards. They become acquaintances, but it's still fun ^_^.

If you're in college, I recommend seeking a counselor and asking them about cognitive therapy for desensitization. If you've honestly got social phobia, that means your hands get clammy, your heart starts beating fast, and you start sweating around people. There's medicine you can take to calm you down until you're comfortable with the environments. Otherwise you can try sticking around with your friend. Social phobia is treatable

 

[BrokenDreams]

Well, I have friends, but I only see them at school. And since the school year is practically over (2 more exams for me), I don't get to see them anymore. I'd invite them over, but they always seem to be too busy to hang out with me. Etiher that or they don't want to, since I can be "annoying" to them sometimes. Yes, its gonna be a lonely summer for me.

 

[dea]

hey there.. yeah ive got social phobia too.. its so **** hard to make friends, and i love having them! i made up my mind when i got here, that i was going to get out there and whatever, but i have to have a few drinks before i can say two words to someone and yeah, sure at the local bar, it seems like everyone likes me.. but after going a few times, i realised its just a novelty factor i guess.. someone new (im in a small town in missouri at the moment, just moved here from australia) .. i dont know. its soo hard to talk to people! how do u know what to say? like u dont want to offend them or anything, and u dont want to seem too familiar to someone u dont know, u dont know what their sense of humour is like, or anything.. and like it seems like at this age, everyone has already established friendships and such and they dont need or want anymore close friends.. anyway thats just how i feel about it

 

[Guest]

I don't know if i have social phobia or not, but i find it really hard meeting new people/talk to people in a group setting. Maybe it's because English is my second language, maybe i'm just really shy. Whenever my (only)friend introduce me to her other friends, i always feel so nervous, i don't know what to say or how to act, i don't even know how to look at the person... so most of the time the other person senses that there's something not right about me....and i end up feel even worse about meeting new people... vicious circle i guess.

 

[justme]

It'd be great if there was (or maybe there already is) support groups for the lonely, just like the alcoholics. Call it Anonymous Loners or what ever.
I quess that it would be helpfull to loners to meet other loners (in real life) and know that they are here for the same reason and that would lower the pressure of failing to interacting with other people. Because even if you fail, you'd know that everyone there understands and maybe has the same problem and therefore wouldn't judge you base on the first impressions. It would also feel comforting to know that you aren't alone in your loneliness.
In my oppinnion, it's not the same "talking" to lonely people online, altough that helps too.

A bit offtopic, but that just come to my mind.

 

[lonelygirl]

Hi Justme,

I agree, I would like to go to a club called Lonely Anonymous. However, I'd be afraid of meeting some of those people in real life--what if they are all mentally ill? I mean, I'm not going to say that I'm not a bit wacky, I do have depression and take meds for it, BUT...what if the person I met was like a serial killer or something! lol I prefer this more anonymous forum for talking with others.