I am making "Barrier of Awkwardness" around me and it makes me sound retarded and people judge me by it and it takes me more than a year to get used to some people and than i act normal around them, but sometimes i simply can't feel close to some people. It's a major turn off to girls at my age (18) and i've been said they same by my ex gf and friends also! I don't wanna be forever alone/awkward/depressed.
OMG i am so awkward!
- Thread starter kindster
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I'm quite similar to you. I'm awkward when I first meet people. However I am able to open up to anybody that opens up to me. I can get comfortable around people in a matter of days if they let me. It all depends on the type of person they are. If I find them attractive it's a little harder for me. But I mean I've worked at my job for 6 months and there are some I feel awkward around because they aren't as outgoing so it's hard to open up to them. Others I've had conversations about anything and everything you could think if. Don't get down on yourself. I've been working up the courage to ask out this girl for awhile because I want to get to know her outside of work were I think I'll be more comfortable. Maybe join a sports team or club at your school, that will help you get to meet people quickly
Wessik
Well-known member
As far as I can tell, awkward behavior usually looks a lot like low-self esteem/lack of confidence. The awkward person will be overly apologetic and excessively self-effacing intentionally, so as to(as you say you are doing) drive away potential friends and mates, so to speak.
The root of it usually lies in a fear of success. Indeed, you may be so scared of what to do once you have achieved a tentative "connection" that you deliberately self-sabotage yourself so that you never have to find out. The usual way to go about defeating this is good old-fashioned acceptance of the problem. Recognition of fear is a powerful weapon, because once you have acknowledged that you are afraid, it becomes much easier to acknowledge that which you want. After which, it is only a matter of time before you begin to take steps towards acquiring that which you seek.
It's a long road. But it is worth it. It is oh so worth it.
The root of it usually lies in a fear of success. Indeed, you may be so scared of what to do once you have achieved a tentative "connection" that you deliberately self-sabotage yourself so that you never have to find out. The usual way to go about defeating this is good old-fashioned acceptance of the problem. Recognition of fear is a powerful weapon, because once you have acknowledged that you are afraid, it becomes much easier to acknowledge that which you want. After which, it is only a matter of time before you begin to take steps towards acquiring that which you seek.
It's a long road. But it is worth it. It is oh so worth it.
Badjedidude
Well-known member
Just embrace it and move on.
It's OK to be awkward and say/do silly things.
Just refuse to let it bother you, and the people around you will view you as a quirky, lively person. EMBRACE IT.
It's OK to be awkward and say/do silly things.
Just refuse to let it bother you, and the people around you will view you as a quirky, lively person. EMBRACE IT.
pumpkin-soup
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Awkwardness can be charming. It's just part of who you are.
I think it's normal you can't feel close to some people...or most people. It feels special when you feel close to someone, because it doesn't happen all the time... but that's just me.
By acting normal do you mean feeling comfortable around them? Maybe it's not just about you, and maybe it's about being around the right people for you. Some people never really get along no matter how long they spend time together.
I think it's normal you can't feel close to some people...or most people. It feels special when you feel close to someone, because it doesn't happen all the time... but that's just me.
By acting normal do you mean feeling comfortable around them? Maybe it's not just about you, and maybe it's about being around the right people for you. Some people never really get along no matter how long they spend time together.
Wessik
Well-known member
That's a good point, Pumpkin-soup. A good part of any social interaction is environmental. I admit that I only familiar with this through second-hand sources. Being an aspie, environmental information tends not to get noticed, unfortunately. But I digress. Perhaps you could meet some people in an environment that is familiar to you?
Then again, this might be difficult if that environment is your own home. In such a case, it would do well to master some other environment first. Luckily, there are plenty of places that are similiar enough to a home-like environment. A library, for one.
Then again, this might be difficult if that environment is your own home. In such a case, it would do well to master some other environment first. Luckily, there are plenty of places that are similiar enough to a home-like environment. A library, for one.
