I've been here a year now, it was last year's Halloween night that I joined ALL. I can remember how terrible things were then, well into my second year in college and had no friends(still after the third attempt to join a group), absolutely no social communication at all, I would go days without talking, I was depressed as hell, wasn't even sure who I was, my only friend in the world(a cat named Nigel) had recently died of cancer, I couldn't sleep at night over past regrets of love lost, I felt like I was slowly losing my mind and my life was falling apart and there I was living on the sixth story of a building, wouldn't believe how often I thought of jumping out that window.
Then I found ALL that night, and started posting. Sure it wasn't directly talking to people, but it was like being rained on after walking through a desert, at least then I had some place to communicate with people and tell stuff to, like if someone hit me in the head with a frisbee or if I walked into an unusually large amount of parked cars that day etc. Seeing other people going through the same thing as me made me feel less lonely, that at least I wasn't alone in being lonely, and that was a comforting thought. Definitely this place and the people here cheered me up when I needed it the most so I'm not doubting that people here saved my life most likely.
Now one year later things are going much better. I'm still facing a slew of problems some new, some old but I feel like I'm able to handle them better now. I'm no social expert or anything by far, I still have plenty of social anxiety and all that jazz, but I now have at least some people to talk to most days of the week,not too much socializing but it is a start just enough to not stress me out too much but enough to make me not feel lonely and recently I feel like my head is finally clear for the first time in several years, I can think straight again and it shows, I am doing well in all of my classes and find them more interesting and engaging as ever.
So thank you everybody for being supportive and some of the kindest people I've ever known. I'll feel down in the future, sure, happiness is a moment by moment thing and by no means permanent but I think I will do just fine, and a lot of that is thanks to you all and there are no words that can describe my gratitude to you all
*End of cheesiness*
Then I found ALL that night, and started posting. Sure it wasn't directly talking to people, but it was like being rained on after walking through a desert, at least then I had some place to communicate with people and tell stuff to, like if someone hit me in the head with a frisbee or if I walked into an unusually large amount of parked cars that day etc. Seeing other people going through the same thing as me made me feel less lonely, that at least I wasn't alone in being lonely, and that was a comforting thought. Definitely this place and the people here cheered me up when I needed it the most so I'm not doubting that people here saved my life most likely.
Now one year later things are going much better. I'm still facing a slew of problems some new, some old but I feel like I'm able to handle them better now. I'm no social expert or anything by far, I still have plenty of social anxiety and all that jazz, but I now have at least some people to talk to most days of the week,not too much socializing but it is a start just enough to not stress me out too much but enough to make me not feel lonely and recently I feel like my head is finally clear for the first time in several years, I can think straight again and it shows, I am doing well in all of my classes and find them more interesting and engaging as ever.
So thank you everybody for being supportive and some of the kindest people I've ever known. I'll feel down in the future, sure, happiness is a moment by moment thing and by no means permanent but I think I will do just fine, and a lot of that is thanks to you all and there are no words that can describe my gratitude to you all
*End of cheesiness*