I only walk with the lord, I await my home ⚰️
- Jun 19, 2021
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Honestly I have no idea how to change the situation, it hasnt changed since I was 16 till now. I thought I knew everything and for a long time I blamed myself and thought it was just punishment for lying to him. But my therapist said all I did was set a standard of being abused.I disagree with everyone on here to an extent. Hate, or anger, is a powerful emotion and an equally powerful driving force if used properly. Because that's all it really is, an emotion, like happiness, or sadness, or melancholy or anything else. Blind anger and hate isn't good, because it's a circle that ends up coming back to bite you in the ass and stops you from thinking, especially if you can't remove yourself from the situation like it seems to be now. But you can use it. It's a defense and survival mechanism. It can lead you to do things you didn't think were possible.
Also, some people on this planet deserve to be hated. It's not politically correct to say so maybe, but it's still true. While it's true that without hate, there'd be no conflict, without conflict, there'd be no self-reflection, or change.
You feeling this way is an indication you're going through a situation you can no longer tolerate. Change the situation. If you feel like you don't have the strenght to, get angry. You'll find that it's a catalyst that can actually give you strenght you didn't know you had.
I had, to some extent still have, anger issues when faced with situations I find to be unjust or intolerable. Instead of standing by idly and just waiting for the situation to change by itself, I use that energy to change the situation. The trick is to not hold on to it all the time.
No one, and I mean NO ONE, should live through the situation that was described above with the phone call. It's childish, idiotic, petty and dumb. Whatever the circumstances, you can do better than that. You hate him now? Good. You **** well should. Change it. One way or another, change it for something better.
Just make sure you don't cling to it.
Mind you, this is just my own personal opinion and might not apply to you. But in my case, anger kept me alive. It has it's uses.
Like Callie said no contact co-parenting was achieved for 8 months after a serious event however, he changed it back due to our daughter becoming distresssed by it. I always think I’d take so much from him to keep her happy but I dont think any of its healthy and I have reached my limit now, im broken now, im crying now again because guilt, and im angry because he didnt have to do this. He didnt have to break me. But Idk im just venting guys