Scrubs???

[ClosetGeek]

I have men call me or email after months or years of not communicating. Be it be ex-boyfriends, casual dates etc.
I am not sure if my attitude plays a role here. I immediately kill the communication between me and a man if he is annoying me or don't want to exchange with him any longer.
Questions
1.Does this happen to other people pretty frequently like it happens to me?
2. Why do men do that? Why call someone if your interaction with that person has died a long time ago?

p.s. I just got paged by this guy who asked me on a date a year ago after exchanging many emails. We met each other through an expat site. Just before we met offline, I found out he had a steady girlfriend and told him to never get in touch me ever again.

 

[Lonesome Crow]

I dunno..maybe their gf/wife didn't burn their blackbbook yet ?

mmm...maybe that guy is a morman or something. ?
maybe he's gf/wife is making him buzz you ?

maybe he's a muslum and trying to practice a little bit of heaven on earth
of getting 79 virgins or something ?

Maybe he's a devote christain and wanna be like King solemen and have 100 billions wives.

 

[Oceanmist23]

I have men call me or email after months or years of not communicating. Be it be ex-boyfriends, casual dates etc.
I am not sure if my attitude plays a role here. I immediately kill the communication between me and a man if he is annoying me or don't want to exchange with him any longer.
Questions
1.Does this happen to other people pretty frequently like it happens to me?
2. Why do men do that? Why call someone if your interaction with that person has died a long time ago?

YES! I only have one ex boyfriend (thank god lol) and he broke up with me in 2002. I met my current boyfriend the year after. Since then my ex has tried to get in contact with me once or twice a year in numerous ways - phone, email, myspace, facebook you name it. He's said he regrets breaking it off with me and has asked if we could get back together. Honestly I would rather eat my left foot... I've told him every time that I'm not interested and that I'm in a happy relationship. I've blocked his email addresses, deleted his phone numbers, I dropped out of myspace ages ago and I've blocked him on facebook. He used to send me a text for every valentines day and sometimes my birthday. One of the worst things was when he sent a text on valentines day when I was with my boyfriend right after we had "gotten busy" (lol). We were not amused at the time...

I don't know, it baffles me. He's the kind of person who has a million friends and two million acquaintances. I'm thinking maybe when you have that many friends it gets too much? Or not what you're really looking for? I think he liked having me around because according to him it made him more popular with other girls. How rude!! You know, the classic.. When someone's available they're not interesting, but when someone's taken suddenly they get very interesting.
I don't know why he would want me back. His family didn't like me and his friends didn't like me, all because I didn't belong to their religion. Despite knowing so many people he was quite shy and self concious back then, I doubt that's changed much.
I don't know, it's all very confusing. I think he has some issues he doesn't know how to deal with.

 

[ClosetGeek]

I don't know, it baffles me. He's the kind of person who has a million friends and two million acquaintances. I'm thinking maybe when you have that many friends it gets too much? Or not what you're really looking for? I think he liked having me around because according to him it made him more popular with other girls. How rude!! You know, the classic.. When someone's available they're not interesting, but when someone's taken suddenly they get very interesting.
I don't know why he would want me back. His family didn't like me and his friends didn't like me, all because I didn't belong to their religion. Despite knowing so many people he was quite shy and self concious back then, I doubt that's changed much.
I don't know, it's all very confusing. I think he has some issues he doesn't know how to deal with.

Yes! It is usually those guys who supposedly have tons of friends who also claim that women just love them. I don't know but maybe the whole popularity thing is fake and he is pretending to be popular?
I recently asked a guy why he wants to talk to me and he said he misses our conversation. He has over 400 contacts in Facebook and around 200 are pretty women he got to know from work etc. I asked him why he is not talking to the ladies he "knows" and he said they are boring. If all these pretty women are boring why keep them as contacts? Hello???
I read a good amount about this whole availability thing and many dating experts say that men are hunters and if you are too available (physically and mentally that is) then this means they feel that they have caught you and lose interest. I don't know if that is true.
I also agree with the issues case.

 

[Lonesome Crow]

You're bascailly saying he looks good on the outside. He's all F-up on the inside.
The issue is happiness is an inside job.

Acquaintance are not friends or people that truely cares about him.
He wants you around becuase I can't live alone...that's why he needs alot of people in his life.

He's very self consiouse becuase all his life his family told him he wasn't good enough no matter
what he did, No matter how successful he becomes...All the crap that happens behind closed doors
that nobody see. That's why it looks good on the outside and all fresia up on the inside.

He seeks all these things on the outside vai money, carreers, relationships, drugs/alcohol abuss to cover up the pain...
if only for a moment or a while. Becuase nothing he dose is good enough, he's not perfect enough.

In other words he has classic symtoms of being an ACOA...You discribe the very basic traits of an ACOA.
It's not what you think..not all alki live in trailor parks. Most are extreemely driven people.
Most ACOA are either over achivers or don't do anything at all. Becuase of the insanity of having
to survive in a wacked out enviorment...when love and pain is the same.

The Dysney's hollywood suger coated version of it is the movie "The KID"

Or "GONE with the WIND"...she's wacked out...but she had good intensions but can be a snot at the sametime.

 

[Steel]

I don't know, it baffles me. He's the kind of person who has a million friends and two million acquaintances. I'm thinking maybe when you have that many friends it gets too much? Or not what you're really looking for? I think he liked having me around because according to him it made him more popular with other girls. How rude!! You know, the classic.. When someone's available they're not interesting, but when someone's taken suddenly they get very interesting.
I don't know why he would want me back. His family didn't like me and his friends didn't like me, all because I didn't belong to their religion. Despite knowing so many people he was quite shy and self concious back then, I doubt that's changed much.
I don't know, it's all very confusing. I think he has some issues he doesn't know how to deal with.

Yes! It is usually those guys who supposedly have tons of friends who also claim that women just love them. I don't know but maybe the whole popularity thing is fake and he is pretending to be popular?
I recently asked a guy why he wants to talk to me and he said he misses our conversation. He has over 400 contacts in Facebook and around 200 are pretty women he got to know from work etc. I asked him why he is not talking to the ladies he "knows" and he said they are boring. If all these pretty women are boring why keep them as contacts? Hello???
I read a good amount about this whole availability thing and many dating experts say that men are hunters and if you are too available (physically and mentally that is) then this means they feel that they have caught you and lose interest. I don't know if that is true.
I also agree with the issues case.

Lmao, its a sad fact of networking sites that oh so many people desperately want to appear popular, and so will sign up as many contacts as they can. The fact that they never speak to these people (or often even know them) doesn't seem to bother them.. it's all in the appearance. They will particularly sign up many members of the opposite sex (this is particularly true of men, but does apply to both sexes) to maintain the illusion that not only are they popular, but they are also sexually desirable!

 

[Oceanmist23]

Yes! It is usually those guys who supposedly have tons of friends who also claim that women just love them. I don't know but maybe the whole popularity thing is fake and he is pretending to be popular?
I recently asked a guy why he wants to talk to me and he said he misses our conversation. He has over 400 contacts in Facebook and around 200 are pretty women he got to know from work etc. I asked him why he is not talking to the ladies he "knows" and he said they are boring. If all these pretty women are boring why keep them as contacts? Hello???

About such guys pretending to be popular I'd think yes, and trying to be more popular than they really are in order to actually boost their popularity in real life, which I doubt would ever work. My ex has over 600 contacts on facebook, majority being students from the university he goes to. I really don't see the point in having contacts on facebook which you hardly know, unless your intentions are to get to know them better in the near future and you actually go through with it.

Lmao, its a sad fact of networking sites that oh so many people desperately want to appear popular, and so will sign up as many contacts as they can. The fact that they never speak to these people (or often even know them) doesn't seem to bother them.. it's all in the appearance. They will particularly sign up many members of the opposite sex (this is particularly true of men, but does apply to both sexes) to maintain the illusion that not only are they popular, but they are also sexually desirable!

What really gets me is when a complete and utter total stranger wants to add me to his friend list. Someone who I've never met and most likely never will meet. What's up with that?! How bloody desperate can some people be?? I swear it's all about desperation, popularity and sex. They deserve to be slapped! (in a non-sexual way that is....)

 

[Lonesome Crow]

it's just a black book...and what the hell are you doing looking in his blackbook anyways ?lol
That's invading his privacy or personal space...
That's just wrong...You wouldn't like it if I look in your diary or scan through your cell phone.

I don't belive he's such a dork to be showing you numbers of other women
if he was trying to get into your pants.lol

No one have that many freinds. We all know that.
I don't even have that many contacts in my work data base.

 

[Oceanmist23]

it's just a black book...and what the hell are you doing looking in his blackbook anyways ?lol
That's invading his privacy or personal space...
That's just wrong...You wouldn't like it if I look in your diary or scan through your cell phone.

I don't belive he's such a dork to be showing you numbers of other women
if he was trying to get into your pants.lol

No one have that many freinds. We all know that.
I don't even have that many contacts in my work data base.

Um....huh?? Sorry lol I'm just a bit confused by your reply to ClosetGeek, what blackbook?? Where did that come from? I don't see that ClosetGeek has invaded any guy's privacy??

Oceanmist is confused! lol

 

[IntolerablE]

I found out he had a steady girlfriend and told him to never get in touch me ever again.

I think she dumped the jerk and now he is looking for whoever to keep him company

 

[Minus]

I think she dumped the jerk and now he is looking for whoever to keep him company

That is what it sounds like.

 

[Lonesome Crow]

will duh....He's single again oneway or another. You don't know what happened. You weren't there.

Let's just say he's looking to get some...we're aduilts

well, no double standards in my world.
Treat other people like you want to be treated...I think.

I garantee you, you won't let you're current partner look in your blackbook , journal, diary,
even if there was only 1 guy you were writing about or called in your pass.

It's not as if "women have closet full of skeltons" is a new age phrase...ya know.lol

 

[ClosetGeek]

well, no double standards in my world.
Treat other people like you want to be treated...I think.

I garantee you, you won't let you're current partner look in your blackbook , journal, diary,
even if there was only 1 guy you were writing about or called in your pass.

It's not as if "women have closet full of skeltons" is a new age phrase...ya know.lol

Excuse me LC I did not even meet this guy offline (the guy who paged me that is) and I don't know how you come up with this blackbook thing. However he or some other guy is free to look into my blackbook etc and it's out in the open that I communicate with various men. If he likes he can meet these men too. I am not in touch with my ex-boyfriends, the men I communicate is mostly men that I have worked with. So I don't have a closet full of skeletons. Thank you very much.

I don't see anything wrong with this since nowadays men also communicate with multiple women. Don't mix up your ex wife with other women. Every woman is different. If you are angry at her don't take it out on other women.

 

[Lonesome Crow]

okay..then, don't mix me up with other guys that hurted you or any other guys.

Why do you freak out ? Don't you have a can of pepper spray..just incase.lmao
It's not as if you never been hit up on before.
And it's not as if you nevered said "NO" before.
You just had a guy approched you...what's the big deal? You could of just told him "NO".
It's not as if he hasn't been rejected before.lol

I guess guys don't see anything wrong with appproching a chick either.
Did he tried to rap you or something?
Was he mean to you ?..
Did he hurted you in anyway ?
Is he stalking you ?

Obviouley not becuase ur still hear.

 

[ClosetGeek]

okay..then, don't mix me up with other guys that hurted you or any other guys.

HUH? Where did that come from? You are the one who is bitter not me.

Why do you freak out ?It's not as if you never been hit up on before.
And it's not as if you nevered said "NO" before.

I now understand why your relationship with your wife went down the drain. It's not because you are an Asian guy but your attitude is annoying. I DON'T look at guys phonebooks, emails etc etc. You have been going about me reading phonebooks for the last two threads. One more time, I DON'T. I respect people's privacy so I don't snoop around.
Next time read the posts more carefully.

I guess guys don't see anything wrong with appproching a chick either.
Did he tried to rap you or something?
Was he mean to you ?..
Did he hurted you in anyway ?
Is he stalking you ?

Obviouley not becuase ur still hear.

We are not talking about normal guy behavior. But, you don't get it. Whatever.

 

[Lonesome Crow]

I don't know that guy...CG.
You do...you make the call.
Better you than me.lmao

Personally if a guy hits up on me...I'd run like hell.

Personally I won't look in my GF cell, journal...etc.
It's just asking for trouble or an argument.
I can't imagine not finding anything in there that might not strair up some jealouse feelings I might get.
There's no piont to it. I know she's been with other men in her past,
...but that has nothing to do with me.
Hell I don't even look in her purse when she ask me to.

If she wants to cheat on me..there's not a **** I can do...that's all there is to it. Besides, I'm too freaken old to be getting into fist fights.

I'm faithful becuase that has everything to do with me. My faithfulness has nothing to do with her, though it might
be a byproduct, but ultimatley I stay faithful for me.
If I can't trust myself, I can't trust anyone else.
I choose to sleep with a clear conciouse.

 

[davechaos]

Now whether it is just me or not...I seem to get contacted by people who think that I owe them something.

In the last three weeks I have had two ex's come out of the woodwork to enquire about my life...what has it got to do with them? I haven't replied to either of them. Why do people come out of the woodwork thinking that you owe them something...and how is it that so many people know what is happening in my life?

I don't leak all the information others know so how do they find out?

Can someone tell me if there is a website out there that tracks individual people?