People are SO puzzling, knowing that maybe they mean no harm doesn't make it better... (reading this again, it feels like a rant, if it looks too long don't bother reading it)
I had this best friend, after we met three years ago we totally hit it off, we started chatting daily, then by accident I moved in a town near to where she lives and we would meet more often. She initiated contact more than I did, and she seemed to enjoy our relationship, although I had this nagging impression that she was looking for me only when she was sad, because she was going through some kind of depression, and I was going through that too. In fact she was always very open, she invited me over for Christmas for two years in a row, she was always available, and a good friend overall. Still, I was really surprised and kind of appalled when last year she told me that she was pregnant and basically disappeared. I tried to call her a few times to know how she was doing but she mostly sounded distant and almost embarrassed to talk with me. Some times she sends the odd little line of facebook, but nothing more. We met a few times, but there is always this ice in the air; I thought all this happened because she was happy with the baby and forgot about me, but last time we met she mentioned that she still has the depression, I don't know what for, at the time we were still talking she always said that she was so sad, but refused to say "why" (I know, I should have asked some more, you console someone for two years and you don't know about what?!). I wish I could help her with the baby but we live 1 hour of train away, and I don't know much about babies, and I still don't understand if she just "got a life" so I, as a single, cannot have a place in it, or if I did something wrong to make her disappear, which is also very possible, or if that is just what happens when people have babies.
Before I found it a bit strange that she would spend evenings talking to me instead of spending time with her partner, but she never mentioned anything wrong with it either, which confused me because each time I met the partner he was strongly complaining about the relationship (!), which is usually not a good sign, is it? But she never talks about him, when she does she says that everything is going well. Anyway, I wish I could be there for her, and, to be selfishly honest, I miss her to be there for me. I don't mind if she is busy, but I have the feeling that she doesn't like me anymore. And I am confused, because I didn't understand why she liked me in the beginning, and now I don't understand why she doesn't anymore, and I feel so clueless and powerless, and I feel I am too old to feel like that.
well, sorry about the rant, maybe you have more clues than me
I had this best friend, after we met three years ago we totally hit it off, we started chatting daily, then by accident I moved in a town near to where she lives and we would meet more often. She initiated contact more than I did, and she seemed to enjoy our relationship, although I had this nagging impression that she was looking for me only when she was sad, because she was going through some kind of depression, and I was going through that too. In fact she was always very open, she invited me over for Christmas for two years in a row, she was always available, and a good friend overall. Still, I was really surprised and kind of appalled when last year she told me that she was pregnant and basically disappeared. I tried to call her a few times to know how she was doing but she mostly sounded distant and almost embarrassed to talk with me. Some times she sends the odd little line of facebook, but nothing more. We met a few times, but there is always this ice in the air; I thought all this happened because she was happy with the baby and forgot about me, but last time we met she mentioned that she still has the depression, I don't know what for, at the time we were still talking she always said that she was so sad, but refused to say "why" (I know, I should have asked some more, you console someone for two years and you don't know about what?!). I wish I could help her with the baby but we live 1 hour of train away, and I don't know much about babies, and I still don't understand if she just "got a life" so I, as a single, cannot have a place in it, or if I did something wrong to make her disappear, which is also very possible, or if that is just what happens when people have babies.
Before I found it a bit strange that she would spend evenings talking to me instead of spending time with her partner, but she never mentioned anything wrong with it either, which confused me because each time I met the partner he was strongly complaining about the relationship (!), which is usually not a good sign, is it? But she never talks about him, when she does she says that everything is going well. Anyway, I wish I could be there for her, and, to be selfishly honest, I miss her to be there for me. I don't mind if she is busy, but I have the feeling that she doesn't like me anymore. And I am confused, because I didn't understand why she liked me in the beginning, and now I don't understand why she doesn't anymore, and I feel so clueless and powerless, and I feel I am too old to feel like that.
well, sorry about the rant, maybe you have more clues than me