Why won't girls be my friend?

Loneliness, Depression & Relationship Forum

Help Support Loneliness, Depression & Relationship Forum:

This site may earn a commission from merchant affiliate links, including eBay, Amazon, and others.
idk.... it seems easier for me to get along with a not too girly girl. I don't know why. I am somewhat girly girl too.. but I'd rather get my hands dirty than go get my nails done. haha
 
Arcane said:
I have the hardest time finding any friends that are girls. They NEVER want to be friends with me.......and I try to be friends with every and ANY type of girl from any race or culture.....none stay my friend for long..and none of them will tell me what i did wrong...am i not girly enough? doess anyone else have problems having friends of the same sex?

I have the hardest time finding any girlfriends that are girls. They NEVER want to be my girlfriends........and I try to be boyfriend to every and ANY type of girl from any race or culture.....none stay my girlfriend for long..and none of them will tell me what i did wrong...am i not boyfriendly enough? does anyone have problems having a girlfriend of the opposite sex?

How desperate does that sound? Um.. pretty desperate. Maybe the problem lies somewhere in this direction? That'd be my guess.

Anyway, I'm inclined to believe you don't actually choose friends, it just happens naturally, 'HEY LET'S BE FRIENDS!' and 'WE'RE NOT FRIENDS ANYMORE!' is how kindergarten/Facebook friendship works. You mean real friendship, no? Not just a status.

Then don't go looking for friends, it puts most people off. Instead place yourself in an environment which is grounds for potential gain of a friend in a natural way and sit back.

Oh wow, same can be said about girlfriend-hunting as well! ******* enlightenment achieved. Hey.. didn't mean to offend, if I did.

So, of course it's harder to become friends with one of the same gender for some of the 'prettier' individuals just because there's no 'easier start' for friendship, 'bonus points' like people being interested in their genitals or dreaming of holding hands and cuddling with them. You get used to easy-mode male friends scoring and after that it seems so much harder to be friends with another girl.

Besides, people generally don't like to be around prettier (or otherwise opposing, competing) 'friends', especially the youth, to whom physical beauty is something major, fueling themselves with the attention they garner by fighting each other for it (waging no less than fake-smile masked Cold War on each other with proper espionage, sabotage and arms race) must feel like thousands of wonderful sparkling orgasms it seems, I was like them once but I forgot what do you need to accumulate enormous amounts of unnecessary attention for. Either magic orgasms, or survival of the fittest is right there man.

Lose attention war - no friends - no girlfriend/boyfriend - no current chance of reproduction - no contribution of 'loser' genes to the gene-pool.

Don't mind me getting sidetracked, I'm done anyway.

No offense, just my opinion and all that.

 
MechanicalMishka said:
Arcane said:
I have the hardest time finding any friends that are girls. They NEVER want to be friends with me.......and I try to be friends with every and ANY type of girl from any race or culture.....none stay my friend for long..and none of them will tell me what i did wrong...am i not girly enough? doess anyone else have problems having friends of the same sex?

I have the hardest time finding any girlfriends that are girls. They NEVER want to be my girlfriends........and I try to be boyfriend to every and ANY type of girl from any race or culture.....none stay my girlfriend for long..and none of them will tell me what i did wrong...am i not boyfriendly enough? does anyone have problems having a girlfriend of the opposite sex?

How desperate does that sound? Um.. pretty desperate. Maybe the problem lies somewhere in this direction? That'd be my guess.

Anyway, I'm inclined to believe you don't actually choose friends, it just happens naturally, 'HEY LET'S BE FRIENDS!' and 'WE'RE NOT FRIENDS ANYMORE!' is how kindergarten/Facebook friendship works. You mean real friendship, no? Not just a status.

Then don't go looking for friends, it puts most people off. Instead place yourself in an environment which is grounds for potential gain of a friend in a natural way and sit back.

Oh wow, same can be said about girlfriend-hunting as well! ******* enlightenment achieved. Hey.. didn't mean to offend, if I did.

So, of course it's harder to become friends with one of the same gender for some of the 'prettier' individuals just because there's no 'easier start' for friendship, 'bonus points' like people being interested in their genitals or dreaming of holding hands and cuddling with them. You get used to easy-mode male friends scoring and after that it seems so much harder to be friends with another girl.

Besides, people generally don't like to be around prettier (or otherwise opposing, competing) 'friends', especially the youth, to whom physical beauty is something major, fueling themselves with the attention they garner by fighting each other for it (waging no less than fake-smile masked Cold War on each other with proper espionage, sabotage and arms race) must feel like thousands of wonderful sparkling orgasms it seems, I was like them once but I forgot what do you need to accumulate enormous amounts of unnecessary attention for. Either magic orgasms, or survival of the fittest is right there man.

Lose attention war - no friends - no girlfriend/boyfriend - no current chance of reproduction - no contribution of 'loser' genes to the gene-pool.

Don't mind me getting sidetracked, I'm done anyway.

No offense, just my opinion and all that.

I was going to say you were pretty out of line assuming that my problem in having any friendships was the desperation..but I guess I only made it seem that way with the post. I don't go around begging people to be my friend or anything...the post stemmed from me losing a friend I've had for over 8 years. We drove to work together every day...and after I quit and all that she just dropped me without warning or reason. I'm just hurt and that happening made me realize how other females treated me and how I lacked any other friendships with girls...It's not only young girls that have a jealousy issue with me. Older women well into their 50s constantly gave me grief at a law office I worked in...Perhaps i'm just surrounded by cruel bitches.
 
Arcane said:
...I'm just hurt and that happening made me realize how other females treated me and how I lacked any other friendships with girls...It's not only young girls that have a jealousy issue with me. Older women well into their 50s constantly gave me grief at a law office I worked in...Perhaps i'm just surrounded by cruel bitches.

Truly good friends are hard to find. I have 3-4 women that I've been friends with for a decade or more and they're like family to me.
Since I don't really know you other than what you've posted on the forum, I can't say why girls won't be your friend.
In my experience ([i]and this is only my experience that I'm making an observation with[/i]) women that I've known who don't have other women as friends see women as competitors when it comes to men and mainly want validation from men, not women. Women are just a side attraction in life and something that gets in the way of getting male attention. Just my personal observation.
I think you already have the answer to your question within yourself, and when you're ready for it, you'll find it.
 
Arcane said:
I was going to say you were pretty out of line assuming that my problem in having any friendships was the desperation..but I guess I only made it seem that way with the post. I don't go around begging people to be my friend or anything...the post stemmed from me losing a friend I've had for over 8 years. We drove to work together every day...and after I quit and all that she just dropped me without warning or reason. I'm just hurt and that happening made me realize how other females treated me and how I lacked any other friendships with girls...

Yes, of course I don't know who you are and what you're about. I can only draw conclusions from mostly vague brief posts I happen to stumble upon. As a rule, when you don't talk people are going to assume what seems to be the worst. So I made an assumption using information you provided knowing that I could be wrong, nothing more. Female friendship can sometimes be emotionally deep and meaningful with oaths of loyalty and honeysuckle, sometimes shallow and fake with potential backstabbing, or maybe the whole thing is just an act, unstable, shifting between levels of friendship at random or it seems so to an outsider. Don't worry, it's how same sex friendship works for females, I've never met an adult woman who didn't have some secret gripes with her female friends. Perhaps it all was just an act on your friend's part, maybe you became disposable for her once she thought there was no longer a point of being friends with you. Again, an assumption. Let me also mention that sometimes women tend to be all over their boyfriends and it seems like they suddenly forget about their friends, this is what possibly could've happened to your friend, give it time in that case but don't forget to remind her of your existence every now and again.

In any case, as I know it, 'friends' that turn their back on you aren't your true friends anyway, more like scenery.

Arcane said:
It's not only young girls that have a jealousy issue with me.

Jealousy issue it is then. Knowing the problem is key to eliminating it. Can't say I know how to extinguish jealousy in others, though. Perhaps just simply keeping in mind that you shouldn't provoke unnecessary jealous feelings in your peers would somehow help in future.

Arcane said:
Older women well into their 50s constantly gave me grief at a law office I worked in...

Oh, older women in their 50s grief everyone they can, trust me. Especially when one of them hags possesses some kind of bureaucratic power. But I know what you mean, I've noticed how they pick on young girls with exceptional fanatic fervor.

Arcane said:
Perhaps i'm just surrounded by cruel bitches.

As are we all, seems to me.

------
Once again, I meant no offense. Who you are and what you believe is yours to determine only. No one can say honeysuckle to you that can't be dismissed at will.
 
Maybe if I wasn't also interested in girls I would be a little more jealous and like the ones I don't like to deal with..I think I'm starting to understand this more..thanks everyone for your input..i feel better .
 
I can assure that Mirshka speaks from experience - at the least, everything he's said, I can more or less back up from my own knowledge.
 

Latest posts

Back
Top