Age

[Triple Bogey]

How important is age when looking for a partner ?
Is age just a number ?

I'm 47 so what is acceptable ?
Will a 30 year old call me a dirty old man ?
Would a 60 year old laugh at me and tell me not to be so daft ?

What do you all think ?

 

[Aisha]

Age is important if you're looking for a long term partner. Especially if you're into the whole 'til death do us part thing.' Someone who you know can be with you for most, if not the whole distance, and who you can relate to because there is no generational gap. Those are the reasons people generally go for people their own age or similar. And more years mean more experience. Someone younger will be less mature than you, someone older might think you're not mature enough, even at 47.
But bridges can be built and there is no mould that everyone fits into. Age really can be just a number for quite a few people. It all depends on the person really.

 

[Tiina63]

I'm 57 and the only reason why I would be hesitant about entering a relationship with a man of 47 is because I would be afraid that he might find someone younger and leave me. I would need a lot of reassurance on this.
Over all though I think Aisha is right when saying that age can be just a number for quite a few people and that it all depends on the individual.

 

[Veruca]

Like Aisha said, I think it depends. The maturity issue can be misleading. On the one hand, someone who is 20+ may seem matured for their age but then they would still lack the years of experience and wisdom that comes with age.

I have a guy friend who is in his forties and he pretty much only dates much younger women. It always ends badly because he says that they are too immature and their expectations are different. He also says that dating a much younger woman leads to a lot of insecurities for himself. He feels old/unattractive/boring and is always worried about the girls leaving him for younger guys. So these are some issues that might come up if one does date younger people I guess.

Ultimately though, you've got to just go with the flow I think. You never know who you might click with. Hope this has been useful.

 

[Stonely]

I don't care much about age, it's more as whether we connect and I like you.

Personally I like girls who are 3-5 years younger than me OR 2-5 years older.

Girls my age (I'm 18) are immature and don't know what they want.

They only go after guys who look like Brad Pitt.

 

[Peaches]

A friend of mine married a guy 14 years her junior, her previous boyfriend was her age but much less mature than this second guy, the first one was 34 but living with his mom and thinking only about his playstation and football

 

[Triple Bogey]

Thanks for all the replies.
I'm asking because I have always thought if I ever did meet anybody they would be either a lot older or a lot younger.
Somebody younger would feel sorry for me or somebody older wouldn't care as much about how I look.
It's just a gut instinct I have.

 

[Aisha]

Personally I like girls who are 3-5 years younger than me
Girls my age (I'm 18) are immature

This is the second time you've mentioned preferring girls who are 13-15. If you're 18+ that sort of relationship is inappropriate in a lot of places, if not completely illegal if it goes to being one of a sexual nature. Be careful. If you think girls who are 18 are immature then I have no idea why you would be interested in girls who are barely out of childhood at 13.

 

[BadInside]

Age is nothing if it's right for you. My ex was 18 years older than me. Women tend to be more mature than you think

 

[Danielle]

Personally, I don't like to date younger men. It makes me feel old, and uncomfortable. I prefer my age or older.... I am 37, and think I would date up to age 50 or so.

 

[Arachne]

I umm and ahhhed about posting here. However, while I know age should not be a factor for adults. In my experience nothing is more sexy than a weathered face, the wisdom of age, the courage from the dark battles. So without being to cliche older men get this woman going. Yet, I have been fortunate to have met, some men who are younger but are a old souls. But still my heart yearns for the older ones.. Bright Blessings

 

[constant stranger]

Tiina63 is right, the issue depends on the individuals involved. I'm 62 and part of a currently friendship zone relationship with a lady of 66.....those 4 years seem to be a bit of an issue for her but not for me. We're in OUR SIXTIES! I tell her.....4 years is irrelevant at this stage of the game!

I'm also in the friendship zone with a lady of 31....she made it clear a few years ago that all I had to do is want the relationship sexualized and it would happen. The 3 decade age difference actually seemed exciting to her. Not for me.....I truly felt like I'd be making a fool of myself. Fortunately I was able to maintain an amiable friendship with her.....with a bit of flirting that we both know will go no further.

So there's no inflexible rules that apply to everyone. IMO.

 

[Nicolelt]

I think the older you get, age doesn't matter as much because you are in the same stage of life. When I was in college, I wanted to date someone else in college because they aren't "ahead or behind" you in life. But when you are out of those stages you go through in your 20's, I don't think it would matter. My mom was 42 and my stepdad was 33 when they met and they are perfectly happier despite the age difference, because they are in the same life stage.

That's just my opinion.

 

[LonelyInAtl]

I don't care much about age, it's more as whether we connect and I like you.

Personally I like girls who are 3-5 years younger than me OR 2-5 years older.

Girls my age (I'm 18) are immature and don't know what they want.

They only go after guys who look like Brad Pitt.

I'm not sure I'd be admitting that if I were you. That's equating a college freshman dating an 8th grader. If you're into young teens at 18, you might want to seek some professional help.

 

[JHK]

Depends on rhe person, I'd think. So long as you aren't going for a 15 year old.
Somedays I feel like I'm 21 going on 70. Some days I feel like I'm 21 going on 13. I think you can only judge when you know someone.

 

[Triple Bogey]

I might be wrong but I think women are more concerned about age than men.

 

[9006]

I think it depends on how old you are mentally. It's not just about looks and numbers.

 

[Triple Bogey]

I think it depends on how old you are mentally. It's not just about looks and numbers.

Are you having a pop at me ?

It must be my imagination when I see women walking around with tall, good looking men and unattractive blokes are generally by themselves !

 

[JHK]

I think it depends on how old you are mentally. It's not just about looks and numbers.

Are you having a pop at me ?

It must be my imagination when I see women walking around with tall, good looking men and unattractive blokes are generally by themselves !

I think... I'm not sure. But I have a theory that it goes both ways.
Because you are right. Beauitful people find mates easier. It isn't too often you see an attractive male sitting in a corner not being hit on, but the unattractive male. Same as the nice guy finishes last theory. It's the attractive bad boy that is gonna get them, not the nice mediocre guy who will hold their door and pull out your chair. That's society.

However, I think there can be a flip side. An aspect where confidence plays a part in the longer run. I'll use me, for an example because I know me first hand and I fit.
I'm not unattractive, I know that. It's feels weird saying that because I can't ******* stand me, but by most standards I know I'm not considered ugly (one girl called me too pretty and hurt my feelings. But that's another story). I don't often have troubles "hooking up". And of course I will. It's human attention and a lay.
But... But it comes to that point where I want to be more, you know? But why would someone like her want to be with someone like me? I come with a fuckton of baggage and most don't want that. There is no way she'll deal with me. It isn't fair to expect her too. So why...
I can't seem to keep someone for long and not because I'm unattractive but because I'm unconfident.

Girls may put up with good looking and mysterious for awhile but eventually that wrapper comes off. Women, now... they don't need a needy, insecure boy. fresia, they already raised that. So if you have the confidence... it'll outshine your looks.

And now maybe the women is older and feeling less confident because she is, well, older and god **** that biological clock and what if she has a kid with that previous good looking loser? Is a guy going to want to deal with that?

And how do we build our confidence in the meantime when all we do is get shut down, always watching other people be happy but we never get the chance...

God, we're messed. Humans. I don't know how we are at the top of the food chain.
I don't know why I'm thinking this much. Especially hung over.
Maybe I just don't really know.

 

[reynard_muldrake]

I don't care much about age, it's more as whether we connect and I like you.

Personally I like girls who are 3-5 years younger than me OR 2-5 years older.

Girls my age (I'm 18) are immature and don't know what they want.

...what could you possibly find attractive about someone who's in the 13-15 age range? Not to mention they have way less maturity than a girl your age (although judging from your posts, your maturity level leaves plenty to be desired). I'm also surprised that only two other people somehow noticed this post. This is one instance where it's okay to call someone out, folks.