Hello, I just wanted to introduce myself here. I'm not sure if anyone else has a similar story but here goes.
I grew up in a strict religion. Individualism was frowned upon and conforming was encouraged. I didn't believe everything but gave my time and energy basically my whole teenage life to this religion.
The funny thing though being in a congregation of over 100 people and another 7 million earth wide I never felt apart of it. I alway felt alone.
My loneliness morphed into depression. I was always left out of social activities. I alway thought maybe it's because I'm not interesting, or I am to shy and people don't want to get to know me. I just never felt like I could be my true self with these people. So I would clam up. I just began to grow up as an insecure, scared individual who built tall walls around herself . Recently I started questioning my beliefs, seeing a therapist and doing research on the history of the religion and realized that my religion had essentially trapped my in this cycle of high expectations, guilt, pessimism and unworthiness. I saw a quote that really really hit me "I used to think the worst thing in life is to end up alone. It's not. The worst thing is to end up with people that make you feel all alone.". After reading that , and learning the facts about my religion I have decided to make my life worth living again. I want to meet new people and help others overcome their loneliness too. Thanks for reading I am sorry if it was too long!
I grew up in a strict religion. Individualism was frowned upon and conforming was encouraged. I didn't believe everything but gave my time and energy basically my whole teenage life to this religion.
The funny thing though being in a congregation of over 100 people and another 7 million earth wide I never felt apart of it. I alway felt alone.
My loneliness morphed into depression. I was always left out of social activities. I alway thought maybe it's because I'm not interesting, or I am to shy and people don't want to get to know me. I just never felt like I could be my true self with these people. So I would clam up. I just began to grow up as an insecure, scared individual who built tall walls around herself . Recently I started questioning my beliefs, seeing a therapist and doing research on the history of the religion and realized that my religion had essentially trapped my in this cycle of high expectations, guilt, pessimism and unworthiness. I saw a quote that really really hit me "I used to think the worst thing in life is to end up alone. It's not. The worst thing is to end up with people that make you feel all alone.". After reading that , and learning the facts about my religion I have decided to make my life worth living again. I want to meet new people and help others overcome their loneliness too. Thanks for reading I am sorry if it was too long!
Again, welcome to the site and feel welcome to respond if you like.
