I won the lottery in regards to parents

[Lonely in BC]

Heya ALL,

I honestly think they don't get it sometimes. I've always had a lousy relationship with my parents and accepted it for what it was- pretty much came to the conclusion years ago I wasn't good enough.

Was going through some old emails tonight and came across one that I must have been too pissed off to read in its entirety at the time (its a little over two years old now)- the essence of it is that my wonderful father broke down what it cost to raise me and he figured I owed him major bucks.

Talk about an eye-opener. I could never imagine cheapening any kind of relationship to dollars and cents.

So much for those few brief moments I've had of trying to reestablish something better left dead....

 

[Barbaloot]

Yikes. I'm sorry.

 

[Limlim]

I've always had a hard time coming to terms with the concept that one should be grateful to their parents for creating and raising them. If you aren't interested in the costs and time investment in having a kid, don't ******* have one. Easy as that.

 

[SophiaGrace]

That's kind of messed up to tell someone to pay you back for raising them. Uh, you take on that cost when you become a parent.

 

[IgnoredOne]

My parents have indicated such to me, and I've tried to raise the funds to compensate them for the cost of raising me.

 

[Lonely in BC]

In some ways I wish I hadn't read that email again, it just reminded me of what seemed to be a never-ending campaign letting me know I was a major disappointment. I'd recently thought of trying for some kind of reconciliation but I realize it would end in frustration again.

I look at The Kid and think about how much she means to me and couldn't fathom doing anything that harmful or demeaning to her. I've often made a "joke" to myself about raising her- basically I go with "however my parents acted, do the opposite".

Life goes on......

 

[Sterling]

My friend's mom has a record of every single penny she has spent on or gave to her. It's even on an excel spreadsheet, organized by month, year, etc. Starts from when she was 16. She's now 24 and her mom wants her to pay her back every single penny of it

 

[perfanoff]

Don't even want to start on how much my family has tried to guilt trip me all my life. About THEIR decisions and actions. That I have NOT had a say in. I know they've made mistakes and I don't have a problem helping them out but being responsible for their life isn't anything I EVER singed up for. It's a really low way to make excuse of their failed life.

So I won the parents lottery, too.

 

[MissGuided]

Aw, BC, I'm sorry. Just remember, you became the awesomeness that is BC without his approval.

 

[SophiaGrace]

Wow we have a frighteningly high amount of people whose parents want them to pay them back for raising them.

 

[Seosa]

Wow, what a complete cock he is.

 

[xrealx]

To the OP I feel you.

I completely agree with limlim. I don't think kids should be "grateful" that their parents brought them to this craptastic world. It was the parents choice to have kids therefore it is their responsibility to raise them.

If I ever have a kid which I doubt, being the exact opposite of how my parents were would be the best thing for the kid.

My mom always tells me how worthless I am every single day and tries to make me feel guilty. I do most of the work around the house, cook for her, clean/all the chores and the next day she'll just tell me that I never do this/that, that I'm terrible. She thinks that her kids have to be her slaves, literally.

She's the most self-centered, abusive and lazy person I know and has told me countless times that she owes me nothing and that I am on my own. I am too mad to sleep right now (past 2 A.M.) because she just said the same things after I went grocery shopping, did all the chores and made dinner for everyone. None of my friends do any of these things for their parents. In fact their parents still serve them.

To add insult to injury she has neglected and abused me throughout my life. I try my best to make things nice for everyone and this is what I get.