If you were dying.

[floatsamjetsam]

I'm just wondering how loneliness would feel to others if they found out they were sick, and faced their mortality directly rather than from afar. Thinking about death, especially in my study of the Tibetan Book of the Dead, has allowed me to handle any problems I'm faced with in the day, any sadness or hardship. Just imaging the end, looking back to the moment I'm in, would I really be that concerned on my death bed as to whether or not I didn't have many friends, or made mistakes that I didn't fix, or didn't have everything I would have wanted in life, it seems almost enough to just be there, in every moment and experience everything in as beautiful a light as possible for as long as I have to experience things.

Near death experiences don't help, for a few days or a week you'll want to change and focus very hard on the here and now, and relieve yourself of all the negative emotions you let yourself feel which have no real basis or hold on you, but trying to accept our own mortality as a reality rather than a theory, seems to rid the mind of very heavy burdens.

I can be alone, but not feel lonely. I never dreamed of this, but it's almost soothing.

I think if a person can accept their mortality, they can view the true beauty and perfection of life, and learn to love every moment of it, rather than spending it in fear running from things that can do nothing worse to you, or take anything more than life will in the end on it's own.

 

[The Good Citizen]

My son is just about to turn 15 and he was up a few weeks back upset about facing the truth that we all have to die, not just him but me, his mum, family everyone he loves. I think at some point at that age everyone faces that realisation, I know I did and as you say there its as if it comes fully into view as a reality rather than a theory. I really felt for him in that moment, I remembered going through the same.

I tried to explain to him that at his age death is a scary concept but as you go through life your perspective changes and that I feel different now I don't fear it as much, I said that as we age we come to terms with it and in our old age our mind is resolved to the fact we have had our time and we may be very tired and we reach a point where the sense of loss is gone and replaced with a sense of completion. I told him not to worry as it was a long way off and when the time came he wouldn't even remember the feelings he was feeling at that moment and be at peace. It seemed to comfort him a little and I hope what I said was true, I think the mind slows down and prepares us for the event as best it can.

 

[WallflowerGirl83]

I thought I was going to die once, it really did shake me up. My depression held me down for years cause I was simply told I was a horrible person my whole life. How many times can you hear something before you start believing it? I'm very much aware of death and life. I'm glad I'm alive but when I feel depressed it's horrible. Diagnosed with manic depression and I never know when those sad days will happen but when they do I invite it all in, and try to comfort that sadness.

Every tear you shed I believe is all the pain we ever felt since day 1 and we need to let it out. Death scares us. But when you feel comfort and love, you feel lifted. Death happens, so does life but noone understands death really. I think the more you enjoy what's around you, you'll enjoy life a lot more.

 

[Lone Apothecary]

I'm just wondering how loneliness would feel to others if they found out they were sick, and faced their mortality directly rather than from afar. Thinking about death, especially in my study of the Tibetan Book of the Dead, has allowed me to handle any problems I'm faced with in the day, any sadness or hardship. Just imaging the end, looking back to the moment I'm in, would I really be that concerned on my death bed as to whether or not I didn't have many friends, or made mistakes that I didn't fix, or didn't have everything I would have wanted in life, it seems almost enough to just be there, in every moment and experience everything in as beautiful a light as possible for as long as I have to experience things.

Near death experiences don't help, for a few days or a week you'll want to change and focus very hard on the here and now, and relieve yourself of all the negative emotions you let yourself feel which have no real basis or hold on you, but trying to accept our own mortality as a reality rather than a theory, seems to rid the mind of very heavy burdens.

I can be alone, but not feel lonely. I never dreamed of this, but it's almost soothing.

I think if a person can accept their mortality, they can view the true beauty and perfection of life, and learn to love every moment of it, rather than spending it in fear running from things that can do nothing worse to you, or take anything more than life will in the end on it's own.

The loneliness wouldn't change if I were mortally ill. Actually, it would probably get a bit better, because I'd know there would be an end to it rather than viewing it as an endless void. At such a young age, I'd be disappointed about everything I wouldn't get the chance to experience, but I'd know that I still spent some time going through the human experience and I believe that is priceless in and of itself. I've already come to terms with the inevitability of death and it no longer frightens me. The act of dying is still an unpleasant thought. One can never know how excruciating dying may be, but worrying about that is redundant; I'll cross that bridge when I come to it. I agree, just having been here to experience life at all is enough for me.

Again, I agree. Death should be treated as if we will cease to exist afterwards until we have definitive proof of something after death. If we live only this one life and nothing lies beyond, then this life becomes infinitely more valuable. Once you realize this, you'd have to be a fool to take anything in life for granted.

Alone, but not lonely, eh? Could you elaborate on that a bit? I'm curious to get a better understanding of what you mean.

Here's the only place where I'll disagree. I wouldn't use the word "perfection." To me, imperfection is what makes life seem so beautiful and wonderful. Aside from that, I agree. You start with nothing and in the end you go back to nothing. Being afraid of going back to nothing will just hinder you, but truly appreciating what you have while you have it will help you get through the bad things in life and embrace the good things.

"Death does not concern us, because as long as we exist, death is not here. And when it does come, we no longer exist." - Epicurus

 

[Lilianna]

I wish that everyone in the world realized you have zero promise of a tomorrow. Anything can happen at any point of your day that could end your life. If more people realized this, not dwell on it and mope around about it, just was truly aware of their mortality, I believe most would feel differently, and act differently.
We are all dying. And just when you (the person reading this) dies, could be at any given time. Something to really think about.

 

[LonelyInAtl]

I would go skydiving, Rocky Mountain Climbing, ride a bull named Fu Manchu, love deeper, speak sweeter, and give forgiveness I'd been denying.

From the lyrics of "Knockin' on Heaven's Door": "you'll be lucky to get out of life alive"

 

[JasonM]

I would go skydiving, Rocky Mountain Climbing, ride a bull named Fu Manchu, love deeper, speak sweeter, and give forgiveness I'd been denying.

Why wait? I'm not sure about finding a bull named Fu Manchu, but you could always draw the mustache on him with a marker.

 

[SophiaGrace]

I wish that everyone in the world realized you have zero promise of a tomorrow.

Adaption level phenomenon does away with the consiousness of this.

 

[Okiedokes]

As strange as that is... yeah it does help knowing I will eventually die no matter what I do. I no longer like to picture myself growing older because who is to say I will even live in the next couple of months for instance. Day by day is easier to face.

 

[Milly]

Death doesn't bother me as much as the idea that other people have died and I've gone on living. I saw quite a few people getting shot dead when I was a toddler, so I suppose I've always been aware of death rather than having it sneak up on me as some kind of existential wedgie.