At first I should say I'm Asian and the amount of money here could seem little to some of you, but my current salary is about 200$.
In February 2011 I found a job at a really small company, it's a small company with a director/manager, a cleaner, an accountant, a deliverer, and me - the designer. Since there weren't many people, we were close and the cleaner was the closet one to me. In July, I found a better job and changed, but still kept in contact with the cleaner. She later quit her job there too, and has went on about 2-3 jobs since then. She is low educated and engaged to manual labor so it's hard to find a good and steady one.
The first time she borrowed me money, was in Lunar new year of 2012 we was at the beauty shop and she asked me for 10$ to straighten her hair. It's not a problem if she didn't lead me into the shop, then asked the hairdresser, and only asked me for money after she set everything up. I was really pissed that day and shouldn't have lent her money. It's bad luck to borrow/lend anything around the first 10 days of Lunar new year in my country. I don't have superstition but I could have used that reason to refuse.
The second time, not so long after that, she asked me for 25$ and told me she had found a new job but didn't have any money left, and would pay back after she received the salary. She did pay back, but just haft of it and I really don't remember if she had pay the rest, I'll tell you why later.
Next, she asked for 250 $ (I remembered I'd told her at Lunar new year that I'd saved up to 250$ and was thinking about making a savings account at the bank.), she said she would pay 50$ each month along with the interest, she wanted to by a cheap motorcycle. We normally use motorcycle in our country and she didn't have one.
I refused, yet we were still friends. That day she told me her son would go to elementary school and she would need money, it was like a prior notice that she would borrow me.
And she did. 100$ this time, I only gave her 50$, she said she would pay 25$ a month. Then for some reasons, she always has believable reasons, she didn't pay or didn't pay enough of 25$. (can't remember)
After that, she just kept paying and borrowing, like pay 25$ and borrow back 10$, then pay 20$... and now I don't know exactly how much she owes me, she told me she still has 25$ left but I'm not sure.
Honestly I can give up that 50$, only if she worths it and this is what makes me think.
Back to when we were working together, now I remember she usually asked the manager for salary advance, just a part or half of her salary. It was a small company and the manager was quite easy on that. I don't think she made friend with me because of money in the first place, but now that she doesn't have a steady job, I become her living-bank instead of the manager.
She has asked me for 25$ again, while she still has 25$ she hasn't payed, to open a small coffee shop at her house. I don't think she's lieing about this since I could visit her anytime to see her shop. But I don't like the feeling of being a living-bank that she would call every time she needs money. And I know I won't get the money back, at least not all.
The reason I haven't cut this friendship of is, despite the thing about money, she is a good friend. And now, it's because of the money, I have to look back and judge her, I don't like doing that but I have to.
We're Asian, we live with our family and her family isn't a good one. If I knew her family before her, I won't be close to her. She has a son, and she is a single mom, yet she doesn't seem to love him much. Not that she hates him, but I have a feeling she just raises him because it's her duty, not because she wants to. If she doesn't care about her own son, would she care about me or it's just a pretend?
I've promised to lend her the 25$ she has asked, I can take those words back anytime and say I need the money for some business. But, I feel it's cruel, and I still think about her as a friend. I could cut the connection anytime, could get away from her anytime but I don't know if I should do it...
In February 2011 I found a job at a really small company, it's a small company with a director/manager, a cleaner, an accountant, a deliverer, and me - the designer. Since there weren't many people, we were close and the cleaner was the closet one to me. In July, I found a better job and changed, but still kept in contact with the cleaner. She later quit her job there too, and has went on about 2-3 jobs since then. She is low educated and engaged to manual labor so it's hard to find a good and steady one.
The first time she borrowed me money, was in Lunar new year of 2012 we was at the beauty shop and she asked me for 10$ to straighten her hair. It's not a problem if she didn't lead me into the shop, then asked the hairdresser, and only asked me for money after she set everything up. I was really pissed that day and shouldn't have lent her money. It's bad luck to borrow/lend anything around the first 10 days of Lunar new year in my country. I don't have superstition but I could have used that reason to refuse.
The second time, not so long after that, she asked me for 25$ and told me she had found a new job but didn't have any money left, and would pay back after she received the salary. She did pay back, but just haft of it and I really don't remember if she had pay the rest, I'll tell you why later.
Next, she asked for 250 $ (I remembered I'd told her at Lunar new year that I'd saved up to 250$ and was thinking about making a savings account at the bank.), she said she would pay 50$ each month along with the interest, she wanted to by a cheap motorcycle. We normally use motorcycle in our country and she didn't have one.
I refused, yet we were still friends. That day she told me her son would go to elementary school and she would need money, it was like a prior notice that she would borrow me.
And she did. 100$ this time, I only gave her 50$, she said she would pay 25$ a month. Then for some reasons, she always has believable reasons, she didn't pay or didn't pay enough of 25$. (can't remember)
After that, she just kept paying and borrowing, like pay 25$ and borrow back 10$, then pay 20$... and now I don't know exactly how much she owes me, she told me she still has 25$ left but I'm not sure.
Honestly I can give up that 50$, only if she worths it and this is what makes me think.
Back to when we were working together, now I remember she usually asked the manager for salary advance, just a part or half of her salary. It was a small company and the manager was quite easy on that. I don't think she made friend with me because of money in the first place, but now that she doesn't have a steady job, I become her living-bank instead of the manager.
She has asked me for 25$ again, while she still has 25$ she hasn't payed, to open a small coffee shop at her house. I don't think she's lieing about this since I could visit her anytime to see her shop. But I don't like the feeling of being a living-bank that she would call every time she needs money. And I know I won't get the money back, at least not all.
The reason I haven't cut this friendship of is, despite the thing about money, she is a good friend. And now, it's because of the money, I have to look back and judge her, I don't like doing that but I have to.
We're Asian, we live with our family and her family isn't a good one. If I knew her family before her, I won't be close to her. She has a son, and she is a single mom, yet she doesn't seem to love him much. Not that she hates him, but I have a feeling she just raises him because it's her duty, not because she wants to. If she doesn't care about her own son, would she care about me or it's just a pretend?
I've promised to lend her the 25$ she has asked, I can take those words back anytime and say I need the money for some business. But, I feel it's cruel, and I still think about her as a friend. I could cut the connection anytime, could get away from her anytime but I don't know if I should do it...
