New Start... Yet nothing new.

[RoflLoller]

And I am always the one to initiate conversations, but when the person I am talking too sees his or her friend they just ignore me. I always try to continue the conversation with small talk (which I hate a lot, because it seems so unnatural), asking questions and such, but the person I am talking to never asks me any questions. It kinda pisses me off a little bit, and makes me feel so **** pathetic, so lately I haven't been talking to anyone.

the people i talk to never ask me any questions too. when i stop talking and stop asking questions there's always an awkward silence. i would have to quickly come up with something to say or ask but it always seems forced. when they see their friends they instantly ignore me. they would walk away from me or focus their attention completely on their friend. it feels very awkward when this happens (which happens a lot) and makes me feel like crap. there has only been one person that i have talked to that doesn't do this to me and she seems genuinely nice. maybe she's just like us?

i sometimes see people that i consider friends (they talk to me and we hang out on rare occassions) and they are nice enough to invite me to sit with them. however, every time i do they talk about something they did over the weekend with a bunch of other people that i also consider friends and how much fun it was. then there's me just sitting there not knowing what to say because i wasn't there. i think they are trying to send me a message, which i have recieved many times, that i am unwanted. but i don't know what else to do. if i don't sit with them, there's no one else and i don't want to be lonely.

 

[*Sigh*]

the people i talk to never ask me any questions too. when i stop talking and stop asking questions there's always an awkward silence. i would have to quickly come up with something to say or ask but it always seems forced. when they see their friends they instantly ignore me. they would walk away from me or focus their attention completely on their friend. it feels very awkward when this happens (which happens a lot) and makes me feel like crap. there has only been one person that i have talked to that doesn't do this to me and she seems genuinely nice. maybe she's just like us?

i sometimes see people that i consider friends (they talk to me and we hang out on rare occassions) and they are nice enough to invite me to sit with them. however, every time i do they talk about something they did over the weekend with a bunch of other people that i also consider friends and how much fun it was. then there's me just sitting there not knowing what to say because i wasn't there. i think they are trying to send me a message, which i have recieved many times, that i am unwanted. but i don't know what else to do. if i don't sit with them, there's no one else and i don't want to be lonely.

It really sucks to be lonely, and I mean it REALLY SUCKS! Sometimes I wish I could just yell that out so people would understand me. I sat at a table with a bunch of kids from my class today, I remember most of their names except a few people that I didn't know. I sat with them because one of my classmates insisted, he is sorta a friend too. Well, I sat there ate my lunch and throughout the whole time when everyone had conversations I just kept quiet. I guess it was okay, I did feel a bit awkward, but at least I didn't sit by myself. Then some girl at the table started to name everybody's name, and she was able to do so until she got to me. I put on a fake smile so I didn't look a loser, and the girl was in my class. But my friend said my name and she moved on. In a way, I think she did it on purpose so that I wouldn't sit by them anymore because after that moment it made me feel like honeysuckle. Its really cruel how some people can be. But anyways, I know exactly how you feel, its really unfair that some people have friends that they take for granted while there are some people out their desperate for friends.

 

[Alex]

the people i talk to never ask me any questions too. when i stop talking and stop asking questions there's always an awkward silence. i would have to quickly come up with something to say or ask but it always seems forced. when they see their friends they instantly ignore me. they would walk away from me or focus their attention completely on their friend. it feels very awkward when this happens (which happens a lot) and makes me feel like crap. there has only been one person that i have talked to that doesn't do this to me and she seems genuinely nice. maybe she's just like us?

i sometimes see people that i consider friends (they talk to me and we hang out on rare occassions) and they are nice enough to invite me to sit with them. however, every time i do they talk about something they did over the weekend with a bunch of other people that i also consider friends and how much fun it was. then there's me just sitting there not knowing what to say because i wasn't there. i think they are trying to send me a message, which i have recieved many times, that i am unwanted. but i don't know what else to do. if i don't sit with them, there's no one else and i don't want to be lonely.

It really sucks to be lonely, and I mean it REALLY SUCKS! Sometimes I wish I could just yell that out so people would understand me. I sat at a table with a bunch of kids from my class today, I remember most of their names except a few people that I didn't know. I sat with them because one of my classmates insisted, he is sorta a friend too. Well, I sat there ate my lunch and throughout the whole time when everyone had conversations I just kept quiet. I guess it was okay, I did feel a bit awkward, but at least I didn't sit by myself. Then some girl at the table started to name everybody's name, and she was able to do so until she got to me. I put on a fake smile so I didn't look a loser, and the girl was in my class. But my friend said my name and she moved on. In a way, I think she did it on purpose so that I wouldn't sit by them anymore because after that moment it made me feel like honeysuckle. Its really cruel how some people can be. But anyways, I know exactly how you feel, its really unfair that some people have friends that they take for granted while there are some people out their desperate for friends.

Oh man, I hate that, when you've been sitting there quietly, and then someone starts trying to name anyone, or any kinda pattern which involves everyone having to participate in some way, and suddenly know you HAVE to join in...hahaha. Its even worse that usually I will be acting aloof just to avoid them thinking I feel bad about not being part of the group, so I have to act like I havn't really been following it exactly when my turn comes...Its hard to explain...and yes, the inevitable fake smile, and ridiculously quiet mutterings.

 

[hellopanda]

Unimpressionable people unite? I agree, it always sucks when people go, "I'm sorry...what was your name again?" I swear I have the fixed robotic smile-through-gritted-teeth expression prepared for the occasion. Gotta love those awkward turtle moments.

I find that I rather dislike my dorm right now. I get along fine with my roommate, but she's rarely in the room. My hallmates I only know in the passing, such as small snippets of conversation in the hallway or elevator or bathroom. Kinda feels like everyone else became one big happy in-family and i'm the eccentric out-relative. Funny how that works. When I approach them they sort of close ranks and ignore me, so I've pretty much stopped trying. People I meet in class I don't see outside of class. The whole college experience is just kind of isolating right now. :X