Petty Problems

[Poguesy]

The other week i read a two-page article in the local news about a lad i used to support through his rehabilitation.

A few years back he was the involved in a serious road accident and as a result suffered a severe brain injury. He had to start over from scratch again with his life, such as his ability to walk, speak, write and do the things he did before the accident.

The article itself focused on the journey he has had since then and the remarkable effort he has put into regaining his former life. What struck me most was what he said - "Little girl died, some have it worse."

Anyways, what i'm getting at is that if a young lad like himself can go through what he has and still find a determination to get on in life then should we ourselves not be doing the same?

All the honeysuckle i have moaned and groaned about in the past and did nothing about it, then read this article and feel ashamed.

My own brother had to battle all his life against his disabilities but sadly lost that fight last year.

Sometimes you need to take a step back and have a think about what you're actually coming out with.

 

[harry]

quite right,they should learn how to live better

 

[Estrios_Vega]

The other week i read a two-page article in the local news about a lad i used to support through his rehabilitation.

A few years back he was the involved in a serious road accident and as a result suffered a severe brain injury. He had to start over from scratch again with his life, such as his ability to walk, speak, write and do the things he did before the accident.

The article itself focused on the journey he has had since then and the remarkable effort he has put into regaining his former life. What struck me most was what he said - "Little girl died, some have it worse."

Anyways, what i'm getting at is that if a young lad like himself can go through what he has and still find a determination to get on in life then should we ourselves not be doing the same?

All the honeysuckle i have moaned and groaned about in the past and did nothing about it, then read this article and feel ashamed.

My own brother had to battle all his life against his disabilities but sadly lost that fight last year.

Sometimes you need to take a step back and have a think about what you're actually coming out with.

I fully agree. So much that happens with us can be called "self-inflicted" but you cannot forget that outside forces also have an influence on who you are and who you may become. I think you are much stronger than you know. If you hae the ability to speak out about your weaknesses that's the first step and you're well on your way to the next - accepting you FOR you mistakes and all! Don't forget there is always someone out there that cares. ALWAYS.

 

[SkuzzieMuff]

"Happy with what you have to be happy with, you have to be happy with what you have,
To be happy with what you have, you have to be happy with what you have to be happy with."
~King Crimson

Really, I think that we all have our own struggles, and our strengths. We need to find a way to live life to the best of our abilities using the things were good at, and trying to overcome the things we're not. Life's a battle, really. So what you gonna do? Be the hero, or drop your sword and sob like a little *****? XD

 

[Poguesy]

To those who replied my respect goes out to you.

To those who didn't have the balls to weigh up their own life.....lol

 

[Lonesome Crow]

Great opening...lameass closing.
Be GRATEFUL N dont whine like a lttle ***** that I pionted that honeysuckle out to ya....its all petty BS

 

[Poguesy]

Great opening...lameass closing.
Be GRATEFUL N dont whine like a lttle ***** that I pionted that honeysuckle out to ya....its all petty BS

Just thought i would see if anyone would bite

 

[dead]

Poguesy, that's a very cool thread.

 

[I'm Fine]

Am I the only one that reads those 'messages of hope and inspiration' and feels even worse about themselves?

 

[fortasse]

Am I the only one that reads those 'messages of hope and inspiration' and feels even worse about themselves?

No.

It depends on my mood, though. Sometimes I'm inspired. Sometimes such messages make me feel like crap.

 

[boodika]

Am I the only one that reads those 'messages of hope and inspiration' and feels even worse about themselves?

This is true....

Although these stories of hope and strength are very inspirational and extremely motivating and humbling, someone has to be in the right state of mind to take it on as it is intended, otherwise it can just make you fell pathetic and less like bothering to try. That is not a judgement on anyones character. Who's to say that in 2 months or 2 years that same person eventually finds the strength to see the inspiration from such stories.

It's just to say that problems and issues are relative to the individual and that someone who rates their life on a scale of 1 - 10 as '1' (the lowest) because they are crippling lonely, and someone who has been through a traumatic accident as '1' because they have to go through physical rehabilitation, does not mean than either one is suffering more than the other from a personal standpoint.

Pain is relative, and each should respect how the other is feeling, no matter what you think their pain should be on your own 1-10 scale.

Everyone's emotions, thoughts and feelings are valid.

 

[Yeah!]

Fantastic thread, and an interesting discussion. I've always heard "Well, at least you're not in Darfur! Imagine how they feel!" Depending on my state of mind at the time, my reaction is either "Yeah, that doesn't actually help me" or "Now I feel shitty that there are all of these people killing each other for dumb reasons. Thanks, *******." Depression is a fairly selfish state of being, I completely understand that as someone whose main mode is somewhere between grumpy and intensely depressed. Like Boodikah said, what you feel is relative to what you feel, and we've all had different experiences that we've been able to deal with in different ways. A friend told me once that after his divorce, he ran into an old College buddy. They talked for a while, and the divorce came up in conversation, and the guy's response was "That's life" which completely downplays the effect it had. To say "That's life" or "At least you're not a floating brain in a jar" does nothing for the need for empathy, meaning or human contact on a mental level. I can't relate to those that go through Hell in Darfur, and as horrible as it sounds, I hope I never will be able to. I can relate to a guy whose best friend is his hamster, or the guy who feels invisible. There's an empathy there, where there is sympathy for people in Japan right now, or those that were caught in hurricane Katrina. Both are shitty, shitty ways to live, and respecting that both parties feel terrible, and are allowed to feel terrible, is vital to retaining a sense of humanity.

 

[Doubt The Rabbit]

PSSSSH! So what? That girl who died had it lucky. There are people living right now in unimaginable torture and WISH that their captor would just have mercy and kill them! What does she have to complain about? Quit being petty.

There is always going to be something bigger, badder, and worse. Those who can throw around "Well at least you're not..." left and right, it's simply an excuse not to help them. It's an excuse not to give them any valid advice and an excuse not to feel sympathetic for something they feel, just because you (well, not YOU...but you get my point) don't think it's important enough.

The question isn't, "Whose pain is more worthy of relieving?" it's, "How can I help to relieve your pain?"

 

[IgnoredOne]

The value in these reflections is specifically on understanding on how such individuals who despite starting from a severely disadvantageous position, can manage to overcome it to somewhere favorable. By discovering how they managed to pool their mental or other resources and refine it into a more satisfying outcome, perhaps we could do the same too.

 

[I'm Fine]

Oh I understand the intention and what I'm supposed to get out of such messages it's just they always leave me feeling even more inadequate because I can't deal with my pretty ok life when these people who have had WAY worse lives than me can, not only manage, but have compassion to spare for others. It just serves to remind me how pathetic I am, that's all.

And thanks to those that said they understand. On the one hand it's nice to know that I'm not alone in that but, on the other, it probably would be better if I was, if that makes sense.

 

[Poguesy]

I'm surprised this thread got more responses but it does make interesting reading.

Thanks to those who replied and gave it thought

---

PSSSSH! So what? That girl who died had it lucky. There are people living right now in unimaginable torture and WISH that their captor would just have mercy and kill them! What does she have to complain about? Quit being petty.

You're still waiting for that pelican to fly

 

[Jilted John]

Am I the only one that reads those 'messages of hope and inspiration' and feels even worse about themselves?

This is true....

Although these stories of hope and strength are very inspirational and extremely motivating and humbling, someone has to be in the right state of mind to take it on as it is intended, otherwise it can just make you fell pathetic and less like bothering to try. That is not a judgement on anyones character. Who's to say that in 2 months or 2 years that same person eventually finds the strength to see the inspiration from such stories.

It's just to say that problems and issues are relative to the individual and that someone who rates their life on a scale of 1 - 10 as '1' (the lowest) because they are crippling lonely, and someone who has been through a traumatic accident as '1' because they have to go through physical rehabilitation, does not mean than either one is suffering more than the other from a personal standpoint.

Pain is relative, and each should respect how the other is feeling, no matter what you think their pain should be on your own 1-10 scale.

Everyone's emotions, thoughts and feelings are valid.

I must be barking,cos I understand everything my cat says. Admittedly his vocabulary is rather limited to "hello" when he lands through the cat flap,"feed me now!" and "open the bedroom door I've had a heavy night on the tiles."