Striking up a conversation

[Lacoste44]

Hey people,

I have no close friends in the town I live in and alot of people that live in my town are mostly 35 years or older I am 24. I have about 45 facebook friends and majority of them live in my town, but most of them are either 5 years older or 2-5 years younger. No one ever chats to me on facebook and ever time I pray someone strikes up a conversation. I like this girl on there who lives 3 hours drive from me and our families have know each other for 15 plus years but I don't know here that well, and we never chat on facebook. I like her from physical view but don't know her personality but I do know she is quite shy along with my self so it makes it harder to strike a conversation. Maybe there waiting for me to start a conversation but on the other hand I don't want to look like I am desperate. I also feel we talk once then we never talk again.

How do you go about striking up conversations with people or I am I trying in the wrong place. I just feel I have no motivation really to go out in my town since most people are over 35 anyways so facebook I have a little connection with.

 

[Brian]

alot of people that live in my town are mostly 35 years or older I am 24.

Do you live in Priest River, ID?

Because you sure described it there


Sorry I can't offer anything helpful. I'm in a very similar situation, and all I can say is every time I've met a girl via the internet, nothing good has happened. I've run in to ones that range (before meeting face-to-face) from passively interested to seemingly obsessed and nothing ever works.

Though ironically, that goes for any girl I meet, period

 

[niki_gal84]

hey Buddy...juz chillax...I can give you some suggetsions if you want...sometimes we gals..wait for a guy to start the conversation...bt yet still depends on individual...diff person diff xpectations..

bt for me, I wud say u start the conversation 1st...well its good rather than not trying at all..who knows it may work or may not...just start tis as 'friendshp' ...lets see hows things work for u...

Well Im not a pro...bt this is just suggestion..

hehe

 

[SophiaGrace]

Why don't you start commenting on the girl's status? You know, the girl that you like that lives three hours away.

 

[kelbo]

but most of them are either 5 years older or 2-5 years younger

First of all I think you need to stop thinking about your age or their age as a barrier. Age is just a number, especially when it comes to friends. I am 21 and I have no friends my own age. The range from 23 - 32 years of age. But it doesn't matter. Why would it?

The more conversations you start, the easier it will become. If you build this up in your mind, it will be so much harder to do. The people on your friends list are there for a reason, they wouldn't have accepted you as a friend or added you. Surely?

So next time someone is online, practice striking up a conversation. Just say hello, ask them how they are. See what they say. The conversation will lead on from there, to what they are up to, have they been up to anything recently, and even what do they do for fun etc. Just go with it. If you feel awkward, what does it matter? They can't see you - and if you want to leave at any point then you can just make up an excuse and go offline.

Either way it will get you into the swing of actually talking to someone. And it will break down your fears of starting a conversation with someone you actually like. So get practising, what could go wrong? x

 

[Just_Some_Dude]

we are the hunter.

they are the hunted.

better strap on your bow and arrow and get out there.

you may have good qualities, even be good looking, whatever, charming...

but for every guy who doesn't try (or pursue) the ladies, they are ten more who will.

it's just the nature of the beast, my friend.

besides older chicks know how to bang.

* the above statements have not been scientifically verified *

 

[Badjedidude]

So get practising, what could go wrong?

Exactamundo! If you never TRY a conversation, if you never practice...then of COURSE you aren't going to do well at keeping up a conversation! You gotta get your hands dirty.

----Steve

 

[Cypha]

hey Buddy...juz chillax...I can give you some suggetsions if you want...sometimes we gals..wait for a guy to start the conversation...bt yet still depends on individual...diff person diff xpectations..

bt for me, I wud say u start the conversation 1st...well its good rather than not trying at all..who knows it may work or may not...just start tis as 'friendshp' ...lets see hows things work for u...

Well Im not a pro...bt this is just suggestion..

hehe

Hey, I don't know you but I thought I'd start converstaion anyway. Hola

 

[EverythingisBlue]

I would just find some excuse to message her on facebook when you see she's on. I wouldn't start commenting on every status message she puts, because that could get a little creepy. the internet is a blessing for shy people. It makes it so much easier to break the ice when, in real life, you'd never just approach that person. My husband and I met online (although we only lived a half hr away), and same for my best friend and her husband.

 

[Lonesome Crow]

Just say Hi or hello. If people feel like talking..they'll talk. If they don't...don't take it personally.
Just go with the flow. Ask them how they're doing and stuff like that...
You don't have to talk about anything deep, important or intellectual.

I had some chick i didn't know say hi to me last night in person...it wasn't a big deal.
She was just being friendly or sort of probing me. I was just chilling miding my own bussiness
and relaxing. It didn't make her feel uncomfortable. I could had got more agressive with her becuase
she pretty much left it open to me and kept smiling back at me....but I have another person on my plate.
It's all good. I wasn't tripping. I know I'm aprrochable by the opposite sex or people in general.
I wasn't thinking about sex...She was pretty thou.

I also dress casual...when I'm out and about. Good hi gyne and stuff like that.
I don't over dress or under dress. This makes me more approchable also.
I don't really dress like most people my age. If there's such a thing.
I dress like people in there mid 20's
However I've been wearing shirts with collars more. My clothe are clean. I still look cool
I been known to just go wherever in my dirty work clothe after work...I don't trip in that either.
I don't wear flashy/shiney stuff. I'm not making a fashion statement I think I look more presentable or blend into the crowd better this way.
My hair is growing and a little bit wavy at the moment. I keep it nice and comb.
I try to keep my nails as clean as posiable.
hahahaaa. I actaully use Axe body soap, shampoo, and body spray.
I also have a roll of breath mints or a some chewing gum. (you can use this as a conversation piece.)
I used to carry a book with me when i had to go do laundry at the luandry mat on Thursday night. (some single women do their luandry on thursday night)
I'll be reading it..then a woman will ask me what I'm reading. or Sometimes she'll pretend there's something wrong with her washer, ask me to help her or ask me for a quarter.hahahaaa

You can use on-line as a bridge ...I personally don't use it as a replacement.
I personally rather talk to someone on the phone or in person.

I also attend support groups.( this too is also a bridge). I talk ,share and listen to a of personal stuff.
Aside from being able to practice interacting with people...I also overcame fears of talking to someone
about some of my personal matters. If i can do this...then I'm at ease when I'm just making conversations.
Most of the people will greet me or give a hug. It helps me get use to interacting with people.
I don't trip if I get a hug for a male friend or I don't react if some female friends gives me a bare hug really, really tight.
I've also had plutonic relationships for most of my life. Yes, yes the freindzone. However that helps me feel more comfortable interacting with women in general.
80% of the people on my FB are women...

 

[Just_Some_Dude]

i would just pm her a photo of your unit :club: with tagline "Hey Baybaaaay"

or not!