fallen
Member
hello, I am Winry (aka:fallen)
I am a very sad 14 year old who has a sister and a little cat. My parents do a lot for me and i feel bad because i feel that i have nothing to offer them worth of value, not even my trust. i am always afraid of what they think of me or what any one thinks of me. usually it is bad.
I live in southern California. I don't like it very much here actaully.
I am in the ninth grade and i am totally lonely. I have a few friends but they really hurt my feelings sometimes and they probably don't know it. My heart is always broken, smashed, ripped, shattered, lost, or maybe even stepped on. I had a friend once, and he was a really good friend, there was even a point where we liked each other, but one day he got mad at me. He thought i called him fat, i told him that i didn't and that i was sorry if he thought that. the thing was that he didn't forgive me, he didn't talk to me anymore, he HATED me. and he still does. he spreads all kinds of rumors about me and everyone always believes him! no one cares to listen...he still does that and it has been a year. He tells people that i have need anger management and that i am phyco and that i need to see a doctor. i used to not like saying this but I HATE him!!! Now my other best friend, I love him dearly but he does not like me like that. My other friends are boy crazy, all they talk about is how boys like them!! it hurts to hear stuff like that, I am happy for them an all, but nobody loves me. i feel horrible!!
I am a Christian and I believe in God, which is keeping me back from doing suicide. I have tried to kill my self once by starvation, i went for a few days but i had to eat. I tried to run away since i was about eight years old. I have hated my self since i was six years old. I used to cry a lot because i thought people hated me. I feel like i don't know anything.
I feel like the whole world is out to get me. I really want to die and i feel like i can't talk to anyone! sometimes all they do is make is worse. i feel like i just don't belong here on this earth. this world was not meant for me and i was not meant for the world. i can't even cry infront of my parents they will think, i don't even want to know what they think of me...
I am always called different names. Like *****, slut, self centered, arrogant, anti-social, weird, freak, phyco. stuff like that even my parents called me.
i really don't know who i am...........
I am a very sad 14 year old who has a sister and a little cat. My parents do a lot for me and i feel bad because i feel that i have nothing to offer them worth of value, not even my trust. i am always afraid of what they think of me or what any one thinks of me. usually it is bad.
I live in southern California. I don't like it very much here actaully.
I am in the ninth grade and i am totally lonely. I have a few friends but they really hurt my feelings sometimes and they probably don't know it. My heart is always broken, smashed, ripped, shattered, lost, or maybe even stepped on. I had a friend once, and he was a really good friend, there was even a point where we liked each other, but one day he got mad at me. He thought i called him fat, i told him that i didn't and that i was sorry if he thought that. the thing was that he didn't forgive me, he didn't talk to me anymore, he HATED me. and he still does. he spreads all kinds of rumors about me and everyone always believes him! no one cares to listen...he still does that and it has been a year. He tells people that i have need anger management and that i am phyco and that i need to see a doctor. i used to not like saying this but I HATE him!!! Now my other best friend, I love him dearly but he does not like me like that. My other friends are boy crazy, all they talk about is how boys like them!! it hurts to hear stuff like that, I am happy for them an all, but nobody loves me. i feel horrible!!
I am a Christian and I believe in God, which is keeping me back from doing suicide. I have tried to kill my self once by starvation, i went for a few days but i had to eat. I tried to run away since i was about eight years old. I have hated my self since i was six years old. I used to cry a lot because i thought people hated me. I feel like i don't know anything.
I feel like the whole world is out to get me. I really want to die and i feel like i can't talk to anyone! sometimes all they do is make is worse. i feel like i just don't belong here on this earth. this world was not meant for me and i was not meant for the world. i can't even cry infront of my parents they will think, i don't even want to know what they think of me...
I am always called different names. Like *****, slut, self centered, arrogant, anti-social, weird, freak, phyco. stuff like that even my parents called me.
i really don't know who i am...........
