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Only one thing left to move - the cat. Here I sit, 4 hours, the clock slowly ticks, my little feline friend does not cope well with confined spaces. I am. Unshowered. Unrested. Cold. He taunts me. He watches from the stair. House empty. Cat obstinate. Ah...but salmon...oh yes...my secret weapon... This is a true battle of the wills. The only way to move him is with a live trap. BUT he knows how to set the trap off by 'bumping' it. Is this how I meet my end? Bested ... by a cat?


At least I passed out and slept soundly in the middle of the cold hard floor for a couple of hours. My sleep has been syncing lately. :)
 
jd7 said:
JHK said:
I really need to go lie down and try to come down off this honeysuckle. I'm so ******* mad at myself right now.
I'm sorry to anyone who read my others posts for ranting, but thank you for talking to me. I appreciate it.

I feel your pain. You ever lay there and listen to your heart in bed afterward. As the real you starts to settle back in and the invincibility gives way to fear, regret, anxiety, and the hope that you don't die tonight? Breathing ever so carefully...

Yes. I remember laying there and it was beating so fast I could feel it in my temples. I was sure it was just going to quit. I was making up headlines in my head. Starteon the obits but really, who is going to write one? The things you think of when you're high.
It all starts off so innocent and looks so pure and tempting and then it lets you fown amd leaves you feeling like something in the gutter but... But, it is always there to pick you up again. And so...


SophiaGrace said:
JHK said:
I really need to go lie down and try to come down off this honeysuckle. I'm so ******* mad at myself right now.
I'm sorry to anyone who read my others posts for ranting, but thank you for talking to me. I appreciate it.

You have nothing to apologize for. You had every right to write what you did. And, honestly, I'm glad you did because it helped me get to know you better.

I don't know. I guess. It's kind of shameful.
 
JHK said:
jd7 said:
JHK said:
I really need to go lie down and try to come down off this honeysuckle. I'm so ******* mad at myself right now.
I'm sorry to anyone who read my others posts for ranting, but thank you for talking to me. I appreciate it.

I feel your pain. You ever lay there and listen to your heart in bed afterward. As the real you starts to settle back in and the invincibility gives way to fear, regret, anxiety, and the hope that you don't die tonight? Breathing ever so carefully...

Yes. I remember laying there and it was beating so fast I could feel it in my temples. I was sure it was just going to quit. I was making up headlines in my head. Starteon the obits but really, who is going to write one? The things you think of when you're high.
It all starts off so innocent and looks so pure and tempting and then it lets you fown amd leaves you feeling like something in the gutter but... But, it is always there to pick you up again. And so...

You start making deals with God in those moments? "If you just see me through this time...never again..."
 
jd7 said:
JHK said:
jd7 said:
JHK said:
I really need to go lie down and try to come down off this honeysuckle. I'm so ******* mad at myself right now.
I'm sorry to anyone who read my others posts for ranting, but thank you for talking to me. I appreciate it.

I feel your pain. You ever lay there and listen to your heart in bed afterward. As the real you starts to settle back in and the invincibility gives way to fear, regret, anxiety, and the hope that you don't die tonight? Breathing ever so carefully...

Yes. I remember laying there and it was beating so fast I could feel it in my temples. I was sure it was just going to quit. I was making up headlines in my head. Starteon the obits but really, who is going to write one? The things you think of when you're high.
It all starts off so innocent and looks so pure and tempting and then it lets you fown amd leaves you feeling like something in the gutter but... But, it is always there to pick you up again. And so...

You start making deals with God in those moments? "If you just see me through this time...never again..."

No... I can't believe in God so... I figure if I go, I go. I do regret what a cliche I would have been.
 
Rainbows said:
I keep getting sadder everyday, I wonder when I'm going to run out of energy.

I try and think of my sadness as a rollercoaster. Yes, I may be flying further and further down with no hope of stopping, but eventually you're going to hit the bottom and fling right back up the other side.

I hope you're feeling better soon.
 
We always want what we cannot get, don't we? Lots of people would like to spend the holidays with somebody but they have to confine to solitude...on the contrary I feel already suffocated by all this love, the festive mood and the bustle going on in my family and I just wish things would be a little more relaxed. Every year my parents stress themselves out, especially my mother...completely unnecessary.

But since it's unlikely any of this is ever going to change...I'd rather be alone just now.
 
Glitter is the herpes of arts and crafts supplies. I've got this honeysuckle all over me now. I'm going to go into work today with glitter bedecked skin and scrubs, looking like a nurse-slash-aging wanna-be-stripper.
 
Pretty sure my new neighbor thinks I and the fella I paid to help carry stuff into the new apartment are a couple. He kept grinning and saying "You guys" LOL... I could have some fun with this...


Perspective..

12 hours without - a shower is a chore
24 hours without - a shower is really nice
48 hours without - a shower is an emotional event
Any longer - nothing short of life changing...
 
These meds are unnecessary. Still crying everyday. The meds can make the roller coaster smoother but won't stop it moving because the issue is something what meds can't change. They can make the ride smoother but that's it.
 
I'm proud of you nephew.
I'm so heartbroken to hear about my niece.
It's so depressing how people keep leaving. Even with those at work? Come on.. spare me some, will ya?

And, I miss you.
 
Seeker_2.0 said:
EveWasFramed said:
TheRealCallie said:
It's going to be a LOOOOOOOONG week. :club:

Yes...this. :club:

At least we get some days off work for holidays. :D

I'm a single working (I work at home) mom and I'll have company at my house for a week. What exactly is a "day off"? lol
 
TheRealCallie said:
Seeker_2.0 said:
EveWasFramed said:
TheRealCallie said:
It's going to be a LOOOOOOOONG week. :club:

Yes...this. :club:

At least we get some days off work for holidays. :D

I'm a single working (I work at home) mom and I'll have company at my house for a week. What exactly is a "day off"? lol

Both of you make a good point. :D
I'm off Thurs - Sun, but I will be cooking Xmas dinner (again) so I won't really be "off." :p

I swear, Im tempted to tell everyone in my family to piss off, that I'm taking Sunday off and NO ONE can call, text, come by, etc. (goo) lol


Ps. Seeker...I read Into the Wild last year. I loved it.
 

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