Niantiel said:I'm in love with someone who doesn't love me.
I got too close, and let my guard down for the first time in four years.
Likewise, I got really hurt.
So, now I'm trying to get over her, and maintain a friendship, without talking about it. I DO have like one thing to ask her about, which is if she remembers the honeysuckle she said to me that night or not. I can't forwardly ask her like that though because she might choose to not know for that moment.
Anyway, I don't wanna lose the girl as a friend.
I've lost mostly all my friends.
That scared me more than anything else, I think.
I moved back here so I wouldn't be alone anymore. That is, what I mean is like totally alone. I can handle being single, as much as I ******* hate it. I'm sort of used to it. What I'm NOT used to is having no friends at all. Which I'm vastly approaching. The thought of being that alone anymore is actually so painful it makes me physically sick. Either I can't sleep, or I'll sleep too much. And I've lost my appetite. I need like a distraction, but I'm so depressed that all of my distractions, games, music, my instrument, movies, tv, all of it is just uninteresting. I can't afford to go drink, which is haha probably for the better.
Life just hit me like a ******* steamroller.
Really sorry you are going through this. I hope you can find a place to be happy in with this girl. Hugs.