Milly
Well-known member
I should offer apologies in advance - there isn't a huge point to this thread, it's just something I kinda feel like I want to tell someone. So in the absence of anyone else to listen, you lucky people are going to get it.
So there's this girl in work whose birthday it is. I've not had many dealings with her but she seems very nice and I thought we get on pretty well. She sends around an email mentioning her birthday and inviting people out for drinks. I'm copied in. Okay. Everything seems okay so far.
Except, of course, I manage to fresia this up. I'm well aware of how petty the following is, but that's the point - these are my tortuous thought processes over something as trivial as wishing somebody happy birthday. This is why I don't speak to anybody.
I started wondering about the best way to wish her a happy birthday. She works over by the office printer so when I go over to pick up some stuff, I think I'll do it then. Except the guy she sits next to is on the phone. Arse. My plan was to casually wish her happy birthday over the printer but it'd be terribly rude to speak over someone on the phone. If I walk around to her desk it looks a bit weird and try-hard. So I go and sit back down.
What now?
I could walk back over - but what if the guy is still on the phone? I'll look weird. In fact, I'll look weird all around if I go over and speak to her now, after I've just had a chance to. I'll look desperate.
There's an office messaging programme - but won't that look even weirder? Won't she think I'm strange if I send her a message rather than speak face-to-face? What if the people who sit around her see the message? Plus if I did send it there's all that awful to-and-fro where I have to pick the most graceful way to end a conversation that doesn't seem rude and also doesn't drag on too long in a weird and desperate way. And all that's assuming she even replies.
In the end, after half an hour of fixating on this problem in a near-tearful state of what's-wrong-with-me frustration, I replied to her email and wished her a happy birthday.
It wasn't even her birthday today - it's tomorrow.
I obviously didn't go out with them tonight, as much as part of me would have liked to have done. Because if I can work myself into such a state over a bloody email, you can imagine what I'd be like in a conversation.
I said earlier I get on fairly well with this girl, and I like to think I do. But for the sorts of fearful reasons above, I keep out of her way because I like the fact we get on and I'm terrified that the more I interact with her, the more likely I am to do something weird or desperate or just plain annoying. The more I like someone the harder I try to keep out of their way. It's madness, utter madness.
So, umm, yeah. Anyone else have that problem?
So there's this girl in work whose birthday it is. I've not had many dealings with her but she seems very nice and I thought we get on pretty well. She sends around an email mentioning her birthday and inviting people out for drinks. I'm copied in. Okay. Everything seems okay so far.
Except, of course, I manage to fresia this up. I'm well aware of how petty the following is, but that's the point - these are my tortuous thought processes over something as trivial as wishing somebody happy birthday. This is why I don't speak to anybody.
I started wondering about the best way to wish her a happy birthday. She works over by the office printer so when I go over to pick up some stuff, I think I'll do it then. Except the guy she sits next to is on the phone. Arse. My plan was to casually wish her happy birthday over the printer but it'd be terribly rude to speak over someone on the phone. If I walk around to her desk it looks a bit weird and try-hard. So I go and sit back down.
What now?
I could walk back over - but what if the guy is still on the phone? I'll look weird. In fact, I'll look weird all around if I go over and speak to her now, after I've just had a chance to. I'll look desperate.
There's an office messaging programme - but won't that look even weirder? Won't she think I'm strange if I send her a message rather than speak face-to-face? What if the people who sit around her see the message? Plus if I did send it there's all that awful to-and-fro where I have to pick the most graceful way to end a conversation that doesn't seem rude and also doesn't drag on too long in a weird and desperate way. And all that's assuming she even replies.
In the end, after half an hour of fixating on this problem in a near-tearful state of what's-wrong-with-me frustration, I replied to her email and wished her a happy birthday.
It wasn't even her birthday today - it's tomorrow.
I obviously didn't go out with them tonight, as much as part of me would have liked to have done. Because if I can work myself into such a state over a bloody email, you can imagine what I'd be like in a conversation.
I said earlier I get on fairly well with this girl, and I like to think I do. But for the sorts of fearful reasons above, I keep out of her way because I like the fact we get on and I'm terrified that the more I interact with her, the more likely I am to do something weird or desperate or just plain annoying. The more I like someone the harder I try to keep out of their way. It's madness, utter madness.
So, umm, yeah. Anyone else have that problem?