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What makes a true friend?
What's your "definition" of a great/true friend? How can you tell if a friend is a good one? Need some opinions.
"Shyness has a strange element of narcissism, a belief that how we look, how we perform, is truly important to other people." -Andre Dubus III

"People think I'm quiet because I have nothing to say, or because of my shyness. Truth is I just keep my thoughts, opinions to myself in case no one will care about what I have to say." -???
Someone who's genuinely concerned with your well-being, appreciates your differences, and will tough out the rough weather.
A Freudian slip is when you say one thing but mean your mother.
A good friend listens to you talk. And You listen when they talk.
Someone who will laugh at me before I even do.
Someone who'd accept me for me, no matter what my beliefs are, how I look, my bad habits but will still tell me off or advice me when needed. Someone who gives without expecting anything in return and gets into arguments with me about paying for the other or not taking the other's share when it comes to meals or movie tickets.. lol.
A true friend is a person:

..that you can reach out to without fear of being rejected for poor reasons. That makes time for you.
..such that you would rather spend time with that person than simply killing time (TV, browsing the web, etc)
..whose actions tell you that they care about you. They show up, they keep you in the loop, they keep their promises
..who respects you. They will not go against you for their enjoyment.
..who stimulates and challenges you. Makes you try, do, learn things you otherwise wouldn't have.

Quite a high mark. Few people checks out at every point.
I suppose it's sexier to be outright evil than to just be incompetent at being good.- mintymint
- true friends will not talk about you behind your back. If they hear something said about you, they will surely tell you. They will not say anything about you that they won't say to your face.

- they will offer constructive criticism to make you a better person.

- they don't care what you look like, how you dress and they will seek your opinions or advice.

- they will never make fun of physical traits or any issues one has. But...but...say something silly or make an ass of yourself and you can bet they will always remind you of a good way.

- they remember your favorite things or stuff you collect and when they see it they will pick it up for you and say "I thought you might like this." They never expect anything in return, but you will return the favor because you appreciate the thought.

- they will ask for some crappiest favors, and deep down you might wince, but you won't mind because you can count on them to return the favor...and they will.

- they confide in you with their deepest thoughts and secrets, knowing it won't come back to them.

- they never want to see you fail and will be supportive of your actions.

- they will invite you to do something because they enjoy your company.
(04-02-2016, 02:45 PM)ChocolateMoose Wrote: What's your "definition" of a great/true friend? How can you tell if a friend is a good one? Need some opinions.

my #1 thing when it comes to a friend seems to be loyalty apparently

in any case, true friends don't exist in my mind, but in place of them are ones you're more likely to relate to than most people.

so instead, i find that for me, a friend is a person you don't have any expectations for. everything you say in this thread, you will never really find in another person immediately; they are aspects of character that they choose to inhabit or not.

if you respect the choices they make for themselves, you won't have to worry what to look for. the things you look for will instead come to you naturally in the form of your own interactions with those people. but if you don't get anything out from these relationships, don't give up.
This is a good question. And not easy to answer, for me, at the moment.
Theres no qualifications to go by or a list to go off of. Its a feeling you get. You understand when someone is a good friend vs someone that is using you. Unless there extremely good at manipulating people. Our inner voice tells us that so and so is great or makes us question so and so actions. If you feel you constantly have to question a persons motives then usually there not a good friend.

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