GoingInsane
Member
- Joined
- Mar 14, 2009
- Messages
- 19
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I'm a male, 19 and I haven't got a social life, never had a girlfriend, and have only been out with people a few times within the last 4 years but with no one I'd class as close friends. Lately I've been having suicidal thoughts because my depression has gotten worst and I feel there is no hope of fitting in with anyone. I have never really met like-minded people and all I do is live in the company of my family and work with people who don't particularly like me and just brag about how good their nights out were and what they did to their girlfriends last night.
Whenever I have been in situations where I've had the opportunity to meet new people and make new friends, I get the feeling of being left out, and not accepted. School was hard times, was unable to stick up for myself and all I did was let people walk over me, never really made friends there or had anything in common with anyone. Now that I have grown up a bit I have a different attitude towards things, I'm able to stand my ground in any problematic situation. I feel the school aspect has lowered my confidence in making new friends and I get the feeling the damage is stuck with me forever. I'm tired all the time, have no energy and have lost my sence of humour which I once had when I was younger.
I do not however fear going out, infact I like going out because it's not often I get an opportunity to do so and get a change of scenery other than inside my house or in my work place. Whenever I do go out, usually I'll have to put up with the reality that I'm on my own and other people are with their friends.
I get told by some people (usually family) that I'm good looking and there is nothing wrong with me. It makes me mad when I hear comments like this because if I'm in this situation to start with, there is definitely something very wrong with me!
One major problem is I cannot hold a conversation very long and usually this results in an awkward silence if you suddenly cannot pick up the next sentence or word to keep it flowing. I'm usually a better talker to 1-2 people instead of a big group of people as that is usually when you look like a mug for saying the wrong thing and your respect is lowered and you get ignored.
No one in my local area is what I'd consider friendly, usually it's all about being hard if you want a reputation.
Counseling didn't help me. Just explaining my life story to a bunch of twats who listen and look at you like you're some sad case and don't offer a solution.
I haven't fully decided yet weather I should end my life, but a positive change isn't looking promising at the moment.
Anyone in a similar boat?
Whenever I have been in situations where I've had the opportunity to meet new people and make new friends, I get the feeling of being left out, and not accepted. School was hard times, was unable to stick up for myself and all I did was let people walk over me, never really made friends there or had anything in common with anyone. Now that I have grown up a bit I have a different attitude towards things, I'm able to stand my ground in any problematic situation. I feel the school aspect has lowered my confidence in making new friends and I get the feeling the damage is stuck with me forever. I'm tired all the time, have no energy and have lost my sence of humour which I once had when I was younger.
I do not however fear going out, infact I like going out because it's not often I get an opportunity to do so and get a change of scenery other than inside my house or in my work place. Whenever I do go out, usually I'll have to put up with the reality that I'm on my own and other people are with their friends.
I get told by some people (usually family) that I'm good looking and there is nothing wrong with me. It makes me mad when I hear comments like this because if I'm in this situation to start with, there is definitely something very wrong with me!
One major problem is I cannot hold a conversation very long and usually this results in an awkward silence if you suddenly cannot pick up the next sentence or word to keep it flowing. I'm usually a better talker to 1-2 people instead of a big group of people as that is usually when you look like a mug for saying the wrong thing and your respect is lowered and you get ignored.
No one in my local area is what I'd consider friendly, usually it's all about being hard if you want a reputation.
Counseling didn't help me. Just explaining my life story to a bunch of twats who listen and look at you like you're some sad case and don't offer a solution.
I haven't fully decided yet weather I should end my life, but a positive change isn't looking promising at the moment.
Anyone in a similar boat?