Any one ever have a long distance relationship?

[Grace2U]

Hiiiii.....

    Wow the lonliness you feel....when the one you love is so far away. the endless waiting for a moment to talk is unbearable, the expensive phone bills (but you want to hear their voice) its so hard, but even though you think maybe you should walk away...just the thought of it sends me into a tail spin, if I thought Id never connect with him again I am so sad...so I keep going...have you ever sent a text message only to wait and wait and no answer...thats the pitts, arent text messages made to be answered, I try to fill up my day with reading, watch Tv, listen to music (which really depresses me) just thought Id try to connect here with someone in the same situation, anyone want to talk about it with me......

 

[Guest]

Hi Grace2U -- I have a similar problem -- no solution! -- but I understand what you're feeling... There are so many things to deal with: the practical stuff (phone bills, expensive travel, different time-zones); the awful loneliness when you get home and wish he/she were there just to hang out with; and then when you do get to talk, you feel it has to be something amazing/profound -- not just the ordinary chit-chat that keeps normal couples going. Oh Grace2U, I wish I had some answers for you!! I guess all I can say is... it's a good time to rebuild any friendships that you neglected while you were immersed in couple-land, and to revisit old hobbies/start new ones. Cliched advice can be the best! -- Get out, try to socialise, even if all the time you're pining to be with your love. Have you tried Skype.com for cheap/free phonecalls??

As for when to give up... I've been doing the long-distance thing for a year now (we've been together seven years in all). As much as I hate it, I'd never consider breaking up with him because of the distance. If it's serious, if he's as keen as you are (ie, if he puts as much effort into staying in touch as you do), and if there's some prospect that you'll be together again eventually... keep at it, I say! Good-luck to you -- I hope it works out!

 

[Guest]

One of the most difficult parts of the long distance relationship is leaving. I just returned to my univeristy leaving my girl friend back home. We make a good effort to see each other at least twice a month, which works out very well for the most part. The biggest problem always is returning to the university after a long break, summer or right now I have finished a one month break from school, during which time I was living with my girlfriend. Nothing makes me feel worse then the feeling of emptiness I have right now and knowing that she will not be next to me when I wake up tomorrow morning.

 

[joeynicdao]

Hiiiii.....

    Wow the lonliness you feel....when the one you love is so far away. the endless waiting for a moment to talk is unbearable, the expensive phone bills (but you want to hear their voice) its so hard, but even though you think maybe you should walk away...just the thought of it sends me into a tail spin, if I thought Id never connect with him again I am so sad...so I keep going...have you ever sent a text message only to wait and wait and no answer...thats the pitts, arent text messages made to be answered, I try to fill up my day with reading, watch Tv, listen to music (which really depresses me) just thought Id try to connect here with someone in the same situation, anyone want to talk about it with me......

I can relate to both, trying a long distance relationship and getting depressed by how you've tried to fill your day. The sad part is that many people who try a long distance relationship are still too young or too inexperienced to need to rely on it (especially if there's a lack of or poor communication) and as hard as it is, you should try to feel good about the freedom you have of being single because the right guy will come along and will want you to be happy when he finds you. You can find something relaxing to do or go out and have fun with your friends. You deserve much better than to hear a guy say he likes you without backing it up.

 

[Guest]

Another guest here.

GAHH I have the same problem. I've never seen him for more than five days at a time (and only a weekend on average), and we've been together for 1.5 years. I'm closer to him when I'm at school than when I'm at home (3 hours vs. 7). But I'm only 19 and I don't know if I should be so serious so early. We have everything - we connect really well, we're best friends, we talk forever, we have a good physical connection, yadda yadda, but I still find myself having dreams about almost cheating with other guys all the time. I would never do this but it disturbs me that I actually dream it so often. He's my first boyfriend and so it always leaves me wondering what it's like to date others or have sex with others. I'm sorta a huge horndog and he's really normal about sex, haha. We met online (not as geeky as it sounds, it was really unexpected bonding over the same music) and so I always wonder what it would have been like to know a guy the "conventional" way, with flirting, dates, living in a similar environment. He's graduated from college and in a serious job. He's 6 years older than me. Should two people from such different stages in life really try to bridge the gap?

I feel like I'll never meet a guy better than him; objectively looking at him, he's perfect. Handsome, smart, good job, sweet, strong, responsible, ambitious, funny, interesting, good taste, etc. But all my friends tell me that when it's real love, I should feel it deep inside and know it. I don't know if I believe in such a thing or not. I know him so well since we talk several hours each day, but I have no idea what it's like to really be with him. What if I live with him for a week and realize it's not love?

I don't know what to dooo! He cares about me very much and I think if nothing drastic happens, we'll be together forever. I care about him very much too, but how can I know that I love him? Help!!