DealMAKERS

Loneliness, Depression & Relationship Forum

Help Support Loneliness, Depression & Relationship Forum:

This site may earn a commission from merchant affiliate links, including eBay, Amazon, and others.
If she passes the litmus test I used in the other thread, she has a reasonable chance of being okay people.

Basically (when I looked) I want a woman who is reasonably attractive by my admittedly unconscious standards, who I don't hate and who hopefully doesn't hate me. It would be preferable if she showed a physical interest in me, because I loathe the idea of having to basically push everything myself. If she is proactive in showing interest or at least expressing herself and her wants that makes it much easier for things to happen.
 
- A physically attractive body with an attractive and unique face.

- Is intellectual and/or philosophical, but who also mixes that with playfulness. Someone who gives me new ideas to think about and also makes me feel alive.

- Can hold a meaningful and fun conversation.

- Has similar taste in books, movies, and music. Books and the movies are more negotiable, because maybe I could find something I like in their favorites as well. But I really like someone to have at least some shared music taste. I can overlooks some of the stuff we don't share, if they also like things that we do have in common.

- Is creative/artistic. Hopefully they'd inspire me to work on my own projects.

- Is lively and adventurous. Has passion. Acts different than most other people. Thinks about unusual things and talks in a unique, cutesy way. Has a sense of sweetness about them.

- Is kind to animals and likes pets.

- Is a happy person (strongly preferred but not required).

- Likes sci fi and fantasy. Not required, but definitely a plus!
 
SofiasMami said:
3. Is a good person even when nobody's looking.
4. Keen on trying new things at least once.

This. Along with other things. But definitely these too.
 
This is a fantastic idea for a thread! Hmmm will probably post more than once as they come to me

Let's start with

He likes to see the good in other people (within reasonable parameters).
Can hold a conversation about anything.
Is interested in always learning, seeing new things a bit like a thirst for knowledge and travel, soak up as much as you can, but at the same time knows how to relax too.

Will come back with more.
 
Within 10 years of my age.

Not necessarily a lot of immediate physical attraction (I have not right to be picky), just a little.

Not fickle. Straightforward and expects others to be.

Believes in monogamy.

Geeky interests aren't a must, but a definite plus.

Can compromise on anything else.
 
Hm... Like my boyfriend:

Honest and trustworthy
Has a good sense of humor
Never stop learning new things in life
Intelligent
Caring and loving
Loves kissing and hugging
Loves animals and little children
Common interests as video games etc.
Older than me
 
For me, I think the most important trait I look for would be someone who finds the world, their surroundings and indeed the universe fascinating.

I have a theory that everyone in the world has a flame inside them, and while some people don't feed their flame and just let it flicker away until they die with nothing to show for their lives, other people are fascinated by the world, want to do things that broaden their horizons, are mesmerized by sunsets or the dawn's light, want to explore far off places, learn new languages, write, sing, dance, love, work, do things for charity and basically recognise that their time on earth is short so try to make the most of every day, then their flame burns brightly in their hearts. Sometimes the flame may wane, or it may even go out altogether, but they do their best to reignite it with everything they do.

When people's flames burn bright, you can see it in their face, their eyes, their smile. The way they talk and move, when they work and play. So when I look for someone I look for signs of a bright burning flame, and when I see it, I know that I will get on famously with them.
 
Great question and as I must be truthful with myself as with you. I post the following with a hope. The hope that she reads it of course and with that we start

1. She would believe in finding me here in some random post. why?
2. She is hopeful. Her light shines brightly sometimes for no reason other than to spite the dark

Thats all truth I know of her. I have hopes and desires of course. But thats all the truths I have save one.

3. We will love each other with a love no poet could write or painter put on canvas. The best kind of love
 
Honesty. Generosity. Kindness. Patience. Patience. Patience.
Willing to put up with the occasional emotional and extra-emotional moments and the frequent confusing bouts of silliness. Is passionate about some things or many things. Is curious, willing to learn and explore. Isn't paranoid. Is mentally stable. Completely faithful. Is attached- I like a sense of belonging to someone and vice versa. Likes cuddling. Likes travelling. Supportive. Good communication skills are a plus. And the bit about liking kids and animals is a must.
Basically just an all round good person.
Physically- there has to be a desire to remain healthy. Everyone has lapses and extended lapses- I'm currently on a hyperextended lapse. :p But if he's not bothered to begin with..
 
Independant! And female. Those are the two biggies.

As for smaller things. I really like to be able to do mental sparring.
As some would find my uncensored humour very offensive, having a similar sense of humour would be nice, not sure if it's required to make it work.
With independance comes emotional stability too i suppose. I prefer that to be on my level or higher.
Emotional stability in turn brings a healthy and attractive look. I think everyone is attractive, but being emotionally unstable can make people not take care of themselves, which i don't find attractive.
So far i don't seem to have much limits as to looks.
Must like salmon. That is actually the third must. Salmon. Obey the salmon. Love it. Worship it. Eat it.
 
Aisha said:
Interesting. Could you explain? Doesn't it follow that one will be accompanied by the other?

I find niceness more about social norms, you do it because you want to be perceived as good, while kindness to me is doing it because you just really want to.
 
LonelySutton said:
I find niceness more about social norms, you do it because you want to be perceived as good, while kindness to me is doing it because you just really want to.

I like these definitions.
 
She-ra said:
Will come back with more.
Please do! I am sure I'll be doing the same, lol.

Triple Bogey said:
Nice arse (I hope that doesn't offend, I'm only kidding :))
I am certainly not offended. Who doesn't appreciate a great ass...et? :)

Rosebolt said:
Must like salmon. That is actually the third must. Salmon. Obey the salmon. Love it. Worship it. Eat it.
Sounds like that could be both a deal breaker AND deal maker for you, lol.


I also love many of the standard traits, e.g., humor, thoughtfulness, confidence, a love of dogs, a fan of my cooking, etc. But.....

Laughing at a lame joke I make in public when no one else does, so that I don't feel like a complete fool. Intentionally singing horribly off-key to my favorite song in the car just to tease me. Even rooting for my favorite team with me because his didn't make the World Series/Superbowl, instead of pouting.

Those may sound silly but little gestures like that really put stars in my eyes.
 
reasonably articulated
curious/passionate/many interests or well pursued
I will add little gestures too
willing to do some house/car fixing (major turn on) or the giving type in general
into healthy eating/living and self improvement
unconventional but not crazy
 
LonelySutton said:
Aisha said:
Interesting. Could you explain? Doesn't it follow that one will be accompanied by the other?

I find niceness more about social norms, you do it because you want to be perceived as good, while kindness to me is doing it because you just really want to.

I see. I can sort of understand what you mean. But on the other hand I have had days when I'm absolutely not feeling up to being nice or kind to anyone, when I force myself to be both, not for the sake of others or to show off, but for my own sake. That sounds selfish, but dealing with a guilty conscience isn't something that is ever easy, at least not for me. I appreciate people being nice just as I appreciate people being kind. In the end those are both choices they are making, whatever their reason may be, they don't have to be either of those things.

Edit: also- deal makers- not doing drugs, not smoking, being a teetotaller.
 
Appreciates beer - good beer, not mass-market-brand swill.

Into the same games. A woman into classic RPGs like Baldur’s Gate or the PS1-era Final Fantasy games...sekzy.
 

Latest posts

Back
Top