driving in my car

[Bluey]

yesterday i wos so board and could not be bothered to cook any thing. so i went to mcdonalds as i often do and seat in the car perk eating on my own.
on the way back i felt really sad and started to fell up with teas. coz i know that i had know where to go but back home where there wos nobody there.
its not save driving a car when you can not see coz your so full up with tears.
how sad is this.
i dont care if i crash and diy. i just dont wont to crash and be moor hurt and live.
sometimes tho i just think about terning into the oncoming car.
but you would just know the stupid err bag would save me and then its of to hospital for moor honeysuckle.
i read somewhere else on hear that somebody said theed like to go to sleep and it well all end peacefully.
you dont owner know how many times i think that.

 

[Vector]

aw!    i'm sorry to hear that mate, i think i know exactly how it feels! this happened to me i think 4 months ago, in xmass time!
for some reasons i felt like i'm going to get crazy, sitting with myself, didnt talk to any person for the whole week. i went out running, going no where in the dark streets,with xmass trees decorated in most windows. with happy people sitting inside chatting and laughin. but looking to the stars, and December Night Clouds has calmed me down. lookin to the semi full moon and the pine trees made feel much better.
but i would say something, you're still very young. very very young. u're 20yr  so it's a bit early to think of that on coming car road!    are you at uni!? just workin!?

 

[Bluey]

aw!    i'm sorry to hear that mate, i think i know exactly how it feels! this happened to me i think 4 months ago, in xmass time!
for some reasons i felt like i'm going to get crazy, sitting with myself, didnt talk to any person for the whole week. i went out running, going no where in the dark streets,with xmass trees decorated in most windows. with happy people sitting inside chatting and laughin. but looking to the stars, and December Night Clouds has calmed me down. lookin to the semi full moon and the pine trees made feel much better.
but i would say something, you're still very young. very very young. u're 20yr  so it's a bit early to think of that on coming car road!    are you at uni!? just workin!?

ye i think u do know. coz i am already dreading Xmas. its so depressing. specially crimbo eve and new years eve.
not sure how am goner get fro another one of those.
well its to early to be thinking of that. am not going to beat my self up over that just yet.
and ye i never bother decorating for crimbo coz there really is no point when its just for me.
and am not that young lol. am 32. 20 is just the age i started living on my own.
so with every year that goes by the harder it gets.

am not at uni. and i dont work coz of health problems and i wouldn't go in to another oncoming car coz i wouldn't wont to hurt any one else. I'd probably hit a lamp post er somert.

and i know wot you mean about all the happy people. all you wont to do is Jonie them in the celebration and have a laugh.

in sated of all this crap of feeling left out. unwonted by society.

and ye sitting by yourself with know one to Turk to.
a week is a long time when your on your own.
it makes me feel like am going crazy as well.

i just need interaction. how difficult can it be.

 

[Jeremi]

That is very hard, when loneliness hits you like a brick wall. I'm sorry to hear that =/

Your comments on death stirred up some emotions. I sometimes think about death. I'm not suicidal. I gave it some thoughts 3-4 years ago, but I doubt I could ever do it. I would never let myself do it. What I'm thinking about is just... dying. I wouldn't mind if I died. I try to think of reasons to live but I can't see any. It's like I'm just waiting to die. If I died tomorrow it wouldn't matter to me. Better to just get it over with, that's how I feel. Again, not suicidal, it's just that life feels so meaningless.

I have this dream about sacrificing my life so I can save another. If I was in a hostage situation and the bad guys were about to execute someone, I would stand up and say "take me instead". It might sound silly, but I would gladly do it. At least then my life wouldn't have been a total waste. Not to mention I volunteered for organ donation when I die. Hopefully that can save a life or two as well.

 

[Bluey]

That is very hard, when loneliness hits you like a brick wall. I'm sorry to hear that =/

Your comments on death stirred up some emotions. I sometimes think about death. I'm not suicidal. I gave it some thoughts 3-4 years ago, but I doubt I could ever do it. I would never let myself do it. What I'm thinking about is just... dying. I wouldn't mind if I died. I try to think of reasons to live but I can't see any. It's like I'm just waiting to die. If I died tomorrow it wouldn't matter to me. Better to just get it over with, that's how I feel. Again, not suicidal, it's just that life feels so meaningless.

I have this dream about sacrificing my life so I can save another. If I was in a hostage situation and the bad guys were about to execute someone, I would stand up and say "take me instead". It might sound silly, but I would gladly do it. At least then my life wouldn't have been a total waste. Not to mention I volunteered for organ donation when I die. Hopefully that can save a life or two as well.

man, it could have been me that right that. its all the stuff i think of.
and i often think about wot if someone tried mugging you and put a gun in your face. lol id be like just pull the f**ing trigger man er f**k of coz u not getting any thing.
but ye dieing ent such a bad thing. its goner happen one day.
i just dont wont to bring it onto myself and hurt my mum and dad in the proses.
i dont think thay would ever get over that.
and also i dont wont to be remembered as the dude that killed him self.
but the dude that died trying to save another life. yep that i could handle. and it would give my parents reason to remember my with pride.

 

[GuestNoLonger]

This thread makes me sad   Mainly because I can relate to a lot of what's being said.  There have been times that I've felt so frustrated with life that I just wanted to scream and cry and let it all out, but somehow I couldn't even force myself to do that.  So I'd usually just end up taking long walks alone in the middle of the night.  I agree with Vector though, there's something strangely soothing about the night air.

I hope you feel better soon, bluey

 

[lonely2beeme]

i use to wanna kill myself when i was younger .
when my husband cheated on me or hit me.
i would take pills and sleep 3 or 4 days .
but i never died obviously.
i found that as i get older i wanna live more than die .
i find that i am actually afraid of dieing, the pain of dieing because face it most people dont die peacefully old and happy in thier sleep.most die because of injury in a accident, illness ,cancer, they suffocate slowly or have heart attacks,or die terriably painful.
and worse one of these and .............alone.
i dont wanna get older , i dont wanna die alone, i still want someone to look at me and adore me and make me feel special.someone who would be happy just because i want to make them lunch, sit next to them at the computer and lay down and put my head in that special place under thier chin where i should fit so very well.
why can't i be loved?sometimes i cry what did i do to deserve this?
i just want to feel alive i am unhappy because i have no life ,i live but i have no life.
so no i dont want to die , i cry because if i took a rie to mcdonalds all that happens is my butt gets that much bigger and the only enjoyment i had for the day was the moment i ate another french fry.life sucks when you have to eat a french fry to feel good then hate yourself for eating it.
i dont mind being heavy, and i love heavy guys,i think a guy with a tummy is sexy problem is even heavy guys want pretty girls ,young girls, girls without children ,girls who will give them babies .i am past that now i am 35 now so i just am old .
i hate pain,i have had way too much emotionally and physically, so i would never risk hurtting myself in a painful way.i cant stop the emotional pain but a car crash i would definately avoid.
i never understand how can single men feel down and lonely its ok for you guys to be older,even not good looking and you guys usually can still get girls especially if your not picky about looks or age ,but us females there is so much pressure to ffind someone while your young after you age its all over.

 

[Vector]

you guys to be older,even not good looking and you guys usually can still get girls especially if your not picky about looks or age ,but us females there is so much pressure to ffind someone while your young after you age  its all over.

I think i do understand you Lonly2beeme, i'll tell you what!? try this website www.plentyoffish.com! try it and you will never know, and if there was any success then please tell us!

i'm so sorry Bluey. it feels sad really reading that thread really.
i wish i had a magicial stick so i can use it each time i see somethin like this! even though i cant use for myself it's ok. i dont know but most of people i did care about r sad people! i hoped to see anyone of them happy but what can i say!?
i was just outsite to buy some food! it's a lovely weather out there! and Yeah!!! all the same things again and again! the same story! all u can see is happy people! Prety girls with ugly guys,Not prety girls with very handsome guys from alllll races, white with chincess, black with asian, Asian with white and so on!! i always ask and wonder what's wrong with us then!?
it looked funny, me going to buy food for myself!! lol walkin back home alone and talkin to myself.

 

[lonely2beeme]

i go but i always feel freaked out when i see the people trying to date its such a meat market and i feel so inferior , i couldnt imagine i would ever really attract a nice guy at one of those places and i have no idea what i could put on about me and most guys want you in the usa if they gonna even have you contact them.
intersting but i am not that brave to date there

 

[lonelygirl]

Hi Bluey,

I know how lonely it can be driving around in a car all by yourself. Modern society has made us so alienated from one another. People can spend their entire days all by themselves with little interaction with others. This is not the way we human animals were meant to interact, so it naturally causes distress for us to be alone.

 

[mimizu]

Maybe it's because everyone else is too confident...

 

[monev]

im sorry you felt like this. I know how you feel, this has happen to me a few times, I just get to thinkin whats going to happen in the future. am I goin to be lonely forever? and just begain to lose it.

 

[Bluey]

im sorry you felt like this. I know how you feel, this has happen to me a few times, I just get to thinkin whats going to happen in the future. am I goin to be lonely forever? and just begain to lose it.

ye i know, its not good at all.
i can not believe how many people think in the same way as me.
it is truly surprising.
beast not try and think of the future to much if you can. it only make you depressed.
thinking about the hear and know is a harder nuff thing to do when you feel that life keeps passing you buy

but i do need to say thanks to every one that has replied to me.
it has chard me up quit a lot to know am not on my own in that i know now that ether people are going frow the same thing's as me.

your all amazing people. every one of you and i wish you all the beast for the future. i truly do with all my heart

 

[Jeremi]

Thank you for sharing your feelings. You're an amazing person too, remember that ^^b