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TheRealCallie

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The last person I talked to wanted to meet, but she asked about my religion. I am very faithful at times and sometimes feel there is nothing there, like now. She ghosted me after I told her that, and about the cult stuff...okay...as I type this I realise what you mean šŸ˜” keep it light.
Even the most faithful people sometimes question things. Faith isn't about knowing all the time that there's something out there. It's not bad to wonder sometimes. I've found that the most devout get mad at and even sometimes question whether anything higher exists. Don't be so hard on yourself, life isn't easy and sometimes you get mad or down and just say screw it to everything.
Yeah, cult stuff definitely isn't "light." I'm not saying never tell the person, but that kind of thing can wait.
 

Richard_39

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Good advice thank you.

I was trying to solve my loneliness by trying dating apps, but I can't seem to communicate effectively. I get many matches but as soon as the conversation becomes more personal things don't work. Either my personality sucks, or I don't express myself properly. Not sure.
Hm, dating apps...
In and of itself, not a big fan of dating apps. That's kind of another topic entirely, but I suspect they do more harm than good. I have more faith in actual discussions with flesh and blood people outside the virtual world and that's what I'd encourage you to seek out. If you do meet someone, of course at first, you keep it lighter. The deep discussions about past experiences, thoughts, emotions and everything else will come in it's own time, at it's own pace.
 

lily_b

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Iā€™m so sorry you are going through this. I can relate.

I came across this quote a few months back: ā€œSometimes when you wonder why you can't hear God's voice during your trials, remember the teacher is always quiet during the test.ā€ That made a lot of sense to me. So I was patient. I continued praying. I continued reading the Bible and deepening my understanding of Godā€™s message. My faith became stronger and I do see God working in my life, if in no other way than to show me he hears me. The things that happen are too frequent and too specific to be mere coincidences.

I just started reading this book a few days ago: Bad News Religion: The Virus that Attacks Godā€™s Grace https://www.ptm.org/books/bad-news-religion-the-virus-that-attacks-gods-grace The author relates his experiences of being involved in a cult and how he kept his faith once he got out.

You matter and God loves you.
 

M_also_lonely

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I grew up in a cult and at school the other kids would make fun of me incessantly because we had strange practices that made me stand out. So school was pretty lonely, but I always felt God was with me.

Now years later I have......
God being with you would mean that he would be against someone else. The very nature of God contradicts that. God has to be neutral. And that neutrality leads to the illusion of unfairness.
I'm pretty down people.
I was just reading one of the books of Nietzsche and he has quite an interesting perspective on this. Great joy has a meaning only as long as great suffering has happened. Its that quenching of the thirst, after a long long journey, that makes water so fulfilling.

So consider it an opportunity, take it as a project. If, somehow, for once, you could get out of this in the best way possible, it would mean you would become immune to it. Think of the mental strength that you could attain, if you came out of it, thoroughly, on your own. And you only have to do it for once. Think think think!!! No one is stronger than a person who healed himself with the help of nobody.
 

user 190311

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Iā€™m so sorry you are going through this. I can relate.

I came across this quote a few months back: ā€œSometimes when you wonder why you can't hear God's voice during your trials, remember the teacher is always quiet during the test.ā€ That made a lot of sense to me. So I was patient. I continued praying. I continued reading the Bible and deepening my understanding of Godā€™s message. My faith became stronger and I do see God working in my life, if in no other way than to show me he hears me. The things that happen are too frequent and too specific to be mere coincidences.

I just started reading this book a few days ago: Bad News Religion: The Virus that Attacks Godā€™s Grace https://www.ptm.org/books/bad-news-religion-the-virus-that-attacks-gods-grace The author relates his experiences of being involved in a cult and how he kept his faith once he got out.

You matter and God loves you.
Thank you, I will take a look at the book, sounds relevant.
 

user 190311

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God being with you would mean that he would be against someone else. The very nature of God contradicts that. God has to be neutral. And that neutrality leads to the illusion of unfairness.

I was just reading one of the books of Nietzsche and he has quite an interesting perspective on this. Great joy has a meaning only as long as great suffering has happened. Its that quenching of the thirst, after a long long journey, that makes water so fulfilling.

So consider it an opportunity, take it as a project. If, somehow, for once, you could get out of this in the best way possible, it would mean you would become immune to it. Think of the mental strength that you could attain, if you came out of it, thoroughly, on your own. And you only have to do it for once. Think think think!!! No one is stronger than a person who healed himself with the help of nobody.
Yes, being carried can breed dependance. It feels better the way you describe it - as a project or development of strength. Thank you. I guess if things were easy and comfy there would be no growth, only stagnation.
 

Sir Joseph

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I have become disillusioned about God. I have become tired of doing all the work in order for him to exist, or to rely on others working as his proxies, tired of eagerly waiting for some coincidence to make him real...

Wildman, you've revealed two of the most important challenges in life - reconciling relationships with God and people. Personally, I find the second one most difficult since people tend to be flawed creatures that constantly let us down. Allow me to stay on safer ground and give my perspective on the God and faith issue.

There are masses of people raised in a religious environment that eventually give it up as they leave home and encounter different educational and cultural influences. The cause of this is people being raised with a blind faith rather than with a firm foundation of evidence for their belief system. In other words, whether one's belief system is right or wrong, it won't stand firm throughout one's life of challenges if it's not grounded with conviction. And while many people hold strong convictions without evidential support, determining a proper relationship between God and man seems too important to base upon blind faith. Evidence is warranted.

Most here would not want me to detail the solid scientific evidence for the existence of God or the archaeological, historical, prophetic, manuscript authority evidence for the Bible. It's true though that such evidence exists, providing a foundational support for the Christian faith unlike no other religion in the world. God's existence is obvious and legitimately undeniable, and for those that seek him earnestly, the Bible reveals his Divine word and guidance to us. Such revelation may not be as awesome as a direct, physical encounter, but it is none-the-less real and pertinent to our lives.

God's inspired words in the Bible not only match the evidence better for determining reality and truth in this world, but they offer a much more encouraging and hopeful message. We're all created special, in his image, for the primary purpose of having a relationship with him. And for those that embrace him through a personal relationship with Jesus, there's a whole new world, body, and eternal life to look forward to. It's the greatest invitation imaginable, far outweighing any of the problems or deficiencies we face in this short, temporary life on this messed up, fallen world.

So Wildman, go ahead and work on those people relationships in various ways as others suggest, but I'd also encourage you to not give up on the one relationship that matters most. In the end, the only relationships that matter or last are the ones we have in heaven. You want to be there.
 

user 190311

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Wildman, you've revealed two of the most important challenges in life - reconciling relationships with God and people. Personally, I find the second one most difficult since people tend to be flawed creatures that constantly let us down. Allow me to stay on safer ground and give my perspective on the God and faith issue.

There are masses of people raised in a religious environment that eventually give it up as they leave home and encounter different educational and cultural influences. The cause of this is people being raised with a blind faith rather than with a firm foundation of evidence for their belief system. In other words, whether one's belief system is right or wrong, it won't stand firm throughout one's life of challenges if it's not grounded with conviction. And while many people hold strong convictions without evidential support, determining a proper relationship between God and man seems too important to base upon blind faith. Evidence is warranted.

Most here would not want me to detail the solid scientific evidence for the existence of God or the archaeological, historical, prophetic, manuscript authority evidence for the Bible. It's true though that such evidence exists, providing a foundational support for the Christian faith unlike no other religion in the world. God's existence is obvious and legitimately undeniable, and for those that seek him earnestly, the Bible reveals his Divine word and guidance to us. Such revelation may not be as awesome as a direct, physical encounter, but it is none-the-less real and pertinent to our lives.

God's inspired words in the Bible not only match the evidence better for determining reality and truth in this world, but they offer a much more encouraging and hopeful message. We're all created special, in his image, for the primary purpose of having a relationship with him. And for those that embrace him through a personal relationship with Jesus, there's a whole new world, body, and eternal life to look forward to. It's the greatest invitation imaginable, far outweighing any of the problems or deficiencies we face in this short, temporary life on this messed up, fallen world.

So Wildman, go ahead and work on those people relationships in various ways as others suggest, but I'd also encourage you to not give up on the one relationship that matters most. In the end, the only relationships that matter or last are the ones we have in heaven. You want to be there.
Thank you for the encouragement, it's much appreciated.

The problem with God is that in isolation, a person cannot know details about Him. They can maybe 'feel' something there but no details are made available because He does not speak. Only by the action of proxies does He communicate details, through ancient writings or hearsay imparted by preaching.

Nobody has ever in isolation got to know the name Jesus or YHWH, it's always by human action that such detail are shared. This begs the question whether God is a cause, or a product of people?

In my isolation He is muted.

The problem with these discussions is that the faithful are unwilling to investigate the origin of their faith, and admit it's based on hearsay. And to admit that that point of reference then allows natural mental functions like confirmation bias, apophenia supported by the tendency of a faith based system to protect it self from scrutiny with explanations outside reality, future salvation or fear of doubt to fill the gaps and take over the personal presence of God.

This is why there are so many faiths who are absolutely sure they are right. Because of the absence of God.

We won't get anywhere if you can't admit such things. Now if God can speak to me and present himself for worship with details and clarity, even in my isolation, I would worship such God, and if it turns out to be mental illness, I can at least write things down and one day billions might worship the illness as God, basing everything on hearsay.
 

Richard_39

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Personally, I find the second one most difficult since people tend to be flawed creatures that constantly let us down.
That's incredibly judgmental and why I steer clear of organized religion. Why, even though I can see where Wildman is coming from and partially agree with that but not everything, I can't find comfort in others speaking of God.
What about our flaws?
I'm flawed. I make mistakes. Everyday I make mistakes that I end up paying for, sometimes beyond repair. Who am I to look at others and say they let me down? And they do. But it's not that they're flawed creatures; it's that I AM.
That's what I should work on instead of judging others. It's hard. It's not easy. I'll stumble. But it's far more useful a thing than look at others and try to play God myself.
It's supposed to be a personal relationship. If God did indeed make us in his own image, maybe what's in the actual Bible isn't true. It sure doesn't sound that way when you read about some of his pettiness and wrath. But maybe, if he is out there somewhere, he expects us to try and rise above ourselves and our own insecurities. Give others more of a chance. Make sense of what we believe in, in a much more personal and individual way than any preacher, or Church ever could.
A line from a movie always spoke to me, for a reason I never quite understood. "God is in the rain". I don't know if it's true or not, I never found him so far. Maybe I should try a bit harder. Today's as good a day as any, it's raining outside.
Maybe that's more the way you should look into, wildman. I doubt He'll make it as easy as us hearing a voice out of nowhere, that would make it easy and indeed, eliminate all doubt.
Maybe that isn't the way He intended it to be. Maybe it's supposed to be more searching from within.
 

NoxApex(N/A)

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The brightest of lights is often found in the darkest of places. šŸ™‚
Nothing worth having ever comes at ease, nor is it ever at the surface of value.
TON 618 is a perfect example.
A hyper-luminous quasar whence the light around its supermassive black hole actually outshines the rest of its galaxy, burning with the luminosity of 160 Trillion Suns. Ton 618's Supermassive black hole itself weighs an estimated 66 Billion Solar Masses, with an estimated event horizon diameter of about X4 the size of the Milky Way galaxy.
 

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