Females but No Males

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August Campbell

My ultimate dream came true.
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What makes me feel Uncomfortable as a Male is that nowadays my only companions are two Females but hardly any socializing with other Males. In fact, I have just one Male friend, and see him very seldom, if at all. As a Male myself, I find this Uncomfortable, because my social outlet is just 10% Male and 90% Female as I see those Females twice a week. No, not at the same time but separately. But I feel Uncomfortable because that's the only socializing I get. Uncomfortable due to lack of Balance. 10% and 90% is extremely Unbalanced. Because I still remember reading an article that stated that there should be a balance--either that or that a Male should have more socializing with his own gender instead of the opposite gender, otherwise the Man is Not masculine. That's what I remember reading once.
By the way, it must be stated that those two Females are Not my girlfriends at all. They are companions. Apparently, they do not like Relationships at all, due to past experiences. So I don't know why they stick around with me on a regular basis. Anyway, based on that article, I wonder whether my Unbalanced socializing is Unhealthy or not. Any replies would be welcome.
 
Don't pay any attention to that stupid article. Hang out with whatever gender you want and forget that balance bullshit. Hangout with people you enjoy hanging out with, regardless of the ratio. Women can be good friends with guys as well.
 
Personally, I've always preferred being friends with women. I already know what a man thinks about. I like getting a different point of view. And, normally you don't have to worry about dealing with the testosterone issues if you end up in an argument.
 
Like Trevor said, just hang out with those that you connect with. People that make you happy. I enjoy hanging out with females as I appreciate a different view on things.

The only question to answer here is, do you enjoy socialising with these women?
 
I agree with everyone here. The article sounds like a big bunch of steaming BS. :poop:

I'm a woman and all my close friends are male - I have one female friend. And it's always been this way, even in grade school. I'm just more comfortable around men.
 
My understanding of balance, doesn't mean everything or one particular aspect needs to always be 50/50.

Think about it. If you married your best friend, of the opposite sex, and had a wonderful relationship, your balance ratio of male/female socializing contact would be way skewed to the female.

Is platonic Sheila still one of your lady friends? I like her style :p :)

I went through a 9 month period, where my only regular intimate social contact was with a very mean lesbian chick I was friends with online... (don't talk to her anymore, she was awful at times, no good.)

In my experience, you make due with what you've got...

So the, 'article in question,' sounds kinda bogus to me. Men these days are very insecure and over compensating. I've always been more strong on my feminine side, gotten along with women, and have only ever kept a few close friends at a time. I'm not a tough manly man type. I don't work construction. I don't drive a truck. Things like that. I just know I'm not like that, and I'm okay with it.

I sometimes wish I could do those things, be more tough, and less fearful; but, I'm not like that, and I'm glad there are folks like that. They build the world and do the tough stuff. But, I'm not like that, at least not in those ways... What can ya do?

Plenty of women are a lot more manly than me. Totally fine with it. To be honest, I'm kind of fed up with the psychology of some folks experience of the masculine side. You are always a pussy if you don't or can't do: such and such. You constantly have to man up all the time, be insensitive, never get your feelings hurt, etc.. etc.

To me, that is NOT what masculinity is. That's what insecurity, fear, and the resulting cruelty is. Yeah, some times it's not always cruelty, and it's just friends having fun with eachother, on a certain level. But, I'm not always at that level, and often find it uncomfortable. As for the rest of it; there is nothing masculine about being a dick or cruel, because you are fearful and insecure.

The masculine, in the ideal, is strong AND tender. And I think, these days, it takes strength to be tender. Many folks seem to struggle with being feeling/compassionate/empathetic/understanding.

You know all that. That's the Tao, Zen... Balance. Sometimes 1/99 is a good balance. Sometimes 99/1 is a good balance. Sometimes 50/50 works. Sometimes it's 60/40. Everything is constantly changing, nothing is still.

I know men often feel very insecure about their masculinity; but, I wonder if women equally, often feel insecure about their level of femininity and in what ways? Many of the women I've known in my life, belched louder than me on the regular, and didn't seem at all uncomfortable with their lack of lady-like attributes, lol. I don't think that made them masculine, just kind of crass...

I dunno, interesting stuff to ponder...
 
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I slightly disagree...
If you want to get with a woman, you can't be too masculine, otherwise the only thing you'll be getting out of the potential is a hookup.
Now, if you're only interested in sex, and hookups are all that you want, then okay that makes sense.
But if you want something more tangible, like an actual relationship, then that requires giving a woman some substance they can correlate.
Also, I don't really consider things like reading to be wholly masculine or feminine. Historically, it just doesn't make any sense to. Writing is like 9,000 - 12,000 years old, potentially older, I think it's a great misunderstanding to write the entirety of that off as unto one gender or the other, knowledge itself is both genderless and formless.
 

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