TheLoadedDog
Well-known member
Hello. Thanks to the admins forapproving me.
I will do the introduction thing, which is fantasticaly like the 1990s chat room "age/sex/location" palaver.
My name is Andrew, I am male (duh), 47, single (not particularly looking), and I am from Sydney. Australia. Yair, g'day.
Now, contrary to popular belief, we do in fact speak a form of recognisable English in Australia
I won't mention chucking a u-ey with Dazza and Shazza in a ute
outside the Macca's while lighting a durry, nursing a goon,
and mulling up with a Chiko roll and a four and twenty, some VB, and a nod to Ned as you pass through Glenrowan
- because that could cause American brain damage.
And I am fond of Americans.
They do some kickarse Warner Bros cartoons, and they created Jake and Elwood. "It's a hundred and six miles to Chicago..."
Gotta respect that, y'know??).
So enough of that.
I am lonely.
Quick precis (look it up Australians, Americans have the better education):
I married when I was in my twenties. Possibly a mistake. But she was a nice lady. amd we left on amicable terms.
But very, very conservative. Of Chinese extraction. Was told, as the eldest child,
her parents couldn't be in Australia, so she would operate in loco parentis. OK. Then along came me.
I was younger than her. So she took me as just another younger brother and started issuing the "do it" orders.
I demurred.
"Erm... we are in a relationship. We are equal partners. You consult me, not order me"
So, that didn't end well.
Still young and full of hormones, I went tomcatting...
Silly boy...
I fell in with a lady a work. I use the term "lady" somewhat loosely.
See, she was the complete oposite of my ex (whom I may or may not have legally married at some point).
Sexy, liberal-minded, sassy, fun, and kinda hot looking... OK
I was taken by her.
I have a close friend. I've known her nearly thirty years. Now this is kinda funny....
She is a Vietnamese lesbian and stands about four foot nothing. I am a meat and potatoes hetero white guy
and I come in over 6'4". An odd couple are we. But we are staunch friends. When I was with this ex,
my friend and I were talking small talk one day, and she suddenly eyeballed me with her piercing black eyes....
"You don't love her, do you?"
Done and dusted.
The ex was evil in a package. I learned this too late. Lost a house. Police involved. Et cetera.
So, it is now 2005. I am 35 years old and newly single. I decide, "enough of this nonsense. I am a bachelor for life!"
And I spent twelve years doing just that.
It was good.
'
And then, this year, Susan (Ill call her that) came along....
Now, we'd been mates (friends for those Americans and others who actually speak English) for years.
We were both in the same boat. Over relationships, and single not looking.
But... well.. things happened.
Love of my life. Smartest person I have ever met. Be it known I am a blue collar worker. I work for the Australian
Post Office. I left school aged 15.
Now, Susan has two degrees in the sciences, and has gone over to the humanities. She is doing her PhD.
Expert ornitholigist. Accomplished in six musical instruments. She paints in oils. Speaks Swahili.
A petite lady, but she is a martial arts exponent and when a drunken footballer tried to accost her
she thew him bodily across a table and smashed his knee.
This is a handsome lady.
And - this shouldn't be important - but she's hella pretty. Eyes hard to describe. Not quite green.
Not quite hazel. I was struggling to describe them, and she told me, "my pop told me they are the colour of the Australian bush."
"Holy sweet creeping... erm, I mean, your pop nailed it right there!"
And she was always out of my league.
Anyway, enough of that.
I can make friends. I'm good at it. No dramas. I just can't KEEP friendships. I let them drift away...
I also like solitude. It's nice. Not loneliness though. There is a subtle but important difference.
So yes. I am lonely. Such is life. I live in a granny flat. Even my aforementioned friend has drifted away. I have nobody.
For any Aussies reading along, be it known that "such is life" were NOT Ned Kelly's last words.
He said, "ah well.. it has come to this." I like that better.
I will do the introduction thing, which is fantasticaly like the 1990s chat room "age/sex/location" palaver.
My name is Andrew, I am male (duh), 47, single (not particularly looking), and I am from Sydney. Australia. Yair, g'day.
Now, contrary to popular belief, we do in fact speak a form of recognisable English in Australia
I won't mention chucking a u-ey with Dazza and Shazza in a ute
outside the Macca's while lighting a durry, nursing a goon,
and mulling up with a Chiko roll and a four and twenty, some VB, and a nod to Ned as you pass through Glenrowan
- because that could cause American brain damage.
And I am fond of Americans.
They do some kickarse Warner Bros cartoons, and they created Jake and Elwood. "It's a hundred and six miles to Chicago..."
Gotta respect that, y'know??).
So enough of that.
I am lonely.
Quick precis (look it up Australians, Americans have the better education):
I married when I was in my twenties. Possibly a mistake. But she was a nice lady. amd we left on amicable terms.
But very, very conservative. Of Chinese extraction. Was told, as the eldest child,
her parents couldn't be in Australia, so she would operate in loco parentis. OK. Then along came me.
I was younger than her. So she took me as just another younger brother and started issuing the "do it" orders.
I demurred.
"Erm... we are in a relationship. We are equal partners. You consult me, not order me"
So, that didn't end well.
Still young and full of hormones, I went tomcatting...
Silly boy...
I fell in with a lady a work. I use the term "lady" somewhat loosely.
See, she was the complete oposite of my ex (whom I may or may not have legally married at some point).
Sexy, liberal-minded, sassy, fun, and kinda hot looking... OK
I was taken by her.
I have a close friend. I've known her nearly thirty years. Now this is kinda funny....
She is a Vietnamese lesbian and stands about four foot nothing. I am a meat and potatoes hetero white guy
and I come in over 6'4". An odd couple are we. But we are staunch friends. When I was with this ex,
my friend and I were talking small talk one day, and she suddenly eyeballed me with her piercing black eyes....
"You don't love her, do you?"
Done and dusted.
The ex was evil in a package. I learned this too late. Lost a house. Police involved. Et cetera.
So, it is now 2005. I am 35 years old and newly single. I decide, "enough of this nonsense. I am a bachelor for life!"
And I spent twelve years doing just that.
It was good.
'
And then, this year, Susan (Ill call her that) came along....
Now, we'd been mates (friends for those Americans and others who actually speak English) for years.
We were both in the same boat. Over relationships, and single not looking.
But... well.. things happened.
Love of my life. Smartest person I have ever met. Be it known I am a blue collar worker. I work for the Australian
Post Office. I left school aged 15.
Now, Susan has two degrees in the sciences, and has gone over to the humanities. She is doing her PhD.
Expert ornitholigist. Accomplished in six musical instruments. She paints in oils. Speaks Swahili.
A petite lady, but she is a martial arts exponent and when a drunken footballer tried to accost her
she thew him bodily across a table and smashed his knee.
This is a handsome lady.
And - this shouldn't be important - but she's hella pretty. Eyes hard to describe. Not quite green.
Not quite hazel. I was struggling to describe them, and she told me, "my pop told me they are the colour of the Australian bush."
"Holy sweet creeping... erm, I mean, your pop nailed it right there!"
And she was always out of my league.
Anyway, enough of that.
I can make friends. I'm good at it. No dramas. I just can't KEEP friendships. I let them drift away...
I also like solitude. It's nice. Not loneliness though. There is a subtle but important difference.
So yes. I am lonely. Such is life. I live in a granny flat. Even my aforementioned friend has drifted away. I have nobody.
For any Aussies reading along, be it known that "such is life" were NOT Ned Kelly's last words.
He said, "ah well.. it has come to this." I like that better.
