I dont have many friends...how much would a girl care?

[omarlittle]

Hey all. So I made a post a few weeks back about a girl I met online. So things actually turned out pretty well, now we're kinda dating. I like her a lot and she likes me too. It's my first real experience with dating and I'm loving it, I feel really happy when I am with her and I miss her when I'm not. Its only been a couple of weeks so its not really a BF/GF thing yet but we seem to have a lot of fun together.

I dont have a lot of friends, especially within the city I live in. So most days/nights, when I'm not working or with her, I'm usually at home alone. On the other hand, she's pretty social/active and she has a a group of friends that she hangs out with regularly when shes not with me.

So my question is...will a girl get turned off if she realizes how lonely/loserish I am? Especially if its only a few weeks into this relationship? I feel like at some point soon enough, she's going to ask about my lack of friends and what the deal is with that. It's kind of worrying me, I'm scared she'll think I'm sort of loser freak. Should I just be fully honest with her and tell her that I don't really have many friends? Or am I just thinking way too much into this?

 

[ladyforsaken]

I think for now you're thinking way too much into this. You just started things off with her, things are still early and new and good. Let it flow and see where it goes. She may or may not have an issue with your lack of friends, but if she does, you can still talk about it with her and see if she understands. From there then you decide what to do next. Just relax, enjoy it. Good luck.

 

[Batman55]

If you let me entertain my inner skeptic without beating me up for it, I would say you'd not have gotten this far without your nice "baseball" stats. Life has taught me, if you don't have the stats, you don't get the dates And here I sit, bitter and alone, envious for those things which I will never have, and you most certainly do have.

 

[jzinsky]

You seem to be fine with not having many friends, and if she says something about it quote Chris Rock:

"Six friends? I didn't have six friends in high school, I don't have six friends NOW!"

 

[Mr.YellowCat]

People are different, and have different problems. And people that are nice and empathic care about the problems of people, and mostly, people they like.
If she likes you, if she is nice, I doubt that will drive her away. She may be upset, but not bacause of her, but because of you, or for you, said better.
I would be honest about it, I think that is the best choice.
And other way around, if she if feeling down with something, whatever it is, maybe being afraid of dark, hating her work, or anything else, she will look for you to be understanding. I think that is one of the main things about being partners, being empathic and supportive, in whatever problems one may have.

However, enjoy this new thing of yours, I hope it will continue making you happy

 

[nerdygirl]

I think you're probably putting too much into it, especially since you're saying you have some friends, but not a lot. If she ever asks (which seems doubtful), you could easily just explain that you don't have many friends because you like to make sure that you only give your time to the absolute best people. What girl doesn't want to hear that you think she's the best?

 

[9006]

If she really likes you then I don't think it will make much difference, it's only early days yet but maybe once she gets to know you a little bit more she'll want to know what's up with that. Just be straight with her and don't try to hide something, I'm sure she'd understand.

 

[rayeo]

It depends on the girl and how she thinks. If she likes you enough she won't be bothered by it. But I don't think having no friends makes you freak or anything, so I personally don't see why she'd be turned off by it.

 

[ardour]

Why don't you just tell her this and see how she reacts? She's going to find this out anyway.

Better to find out now than later.

 

[jzinsky]

Why tell her? That makes it A Thing, and thus something that he's bothered about (either positively or negatively)

 

[nerdygirl]

Why tell her? That makes it A Thing, and thus something that he's bothered about (either positively or negatively)

The op was talking about telling her this if she asked. If she asked and he didn't tell her, THAT would make it A Thing.

 

[mintymint]

Again with the F word.

 

[jzinsky]

Why tell her? That makes it A Thing, and thus something that he's bothered about (either positively or negatively)

The op was talking about telling her this if she asked. If she asked and he didn't tell her, THAT would make it A Thing.

Ah good point

Posted by mintymint - Today 01:49 AM
Again with the F word.

Fail? Fred? What F word? Who?

 

[ForGrantedWife]

I'm going to throw something out there that wasn't mentioned. Instead of trying to hide it, you could simply say "Hey you know I'd love to hang out with you and your friends sometime because I'm sick of hanging at home and doing nothing. Why don't we all go to this upcoming concert or movie and then I can meet all your buddies? We can all hang out as friends for once." Instead of getting shut out, join them once in awhile. This is a chance to gain more friends with no pressure. Don't call it a date because I feel it may be a bit soon. But enlist her help in finding people to socialize with because it sounds like she's got that down pat. If she's nice and hanging out with you, ask for her help in drawing you into other crowds. Just be happy, smile a lot. Joke around with the new people. They'll probably welcome you in.

 

[nerdygirl]

I'm going to throw something out there that wasn't mentioned. Instead of trying to hide it, you could simply say "Hey you know I'd love to hang out with you and your friends sometime because I'm sick of hanging at home and doing nothing. Why don't we all go to this upcoming concert or movie and then I can meet all your buddies? We can all hang out as friends for once." Instead of getting shut out, join them once in awhile. This is a chance to gain more friends with no pressure. Don't call it a date because I feel it may be a bit soon. But enlist her help in finding people to socialize with because it sounds like she's got that down pat. If she's nice and hanging out with you, ask for her help in drawing you into other crowds. Just be happy, smile a lot. Joke around with the new people. They'll probably welcome you in.

I like the idea of asking to meet her friends, but I do want to say- I don't think I remember anybody suggesting he hide it? Just one thing, though... if you do this, be careful not to seem to interested in any of her friends since you said you're, "kinda dating".

 

[jzinsky]

I'm going to throw something out there that wasn't mentioned. Instead of trying to hide it, you could simply say "Hey you know I'd love to hang out with you and your friends sometime because I'm sick of hanging at home and doing nothing. Why don't we all go to this upcoming concert or movie and then I can meet all your buddies? We can all hang out as friends for once." Instead of getting shut out, join them once in awhile. This is a chance to gain more friends with no pressure. Don't call it a date because I feel it may be a bit soon. But enlist her help in finding people to socialize with because it sounds like she's got that down pat. If she's nice and hanging out with you, ask for her help in drawing you into other crowds. Just be happy, smile a lot. Joke around with the new people. They'll probably welcome you in.

I like the idea of asking to meet her friends, but I do want to say- I don't think I remember anybody suggesting he hide it? Just one thing, though... if you do this, be careful not to seem to interested in any of her friends since you said you're, "kinda dating".

So simple we all missed it!