C
copperation
Guest
I've not had much success with women in my life. I've had just enough to keep me from going mad or bad but not enough to be sustained.
I don't know how many times I've heard the hackneyed excuse that even though I'm the nicest guy they've ever known and would take me as a good friend anyday, etc, I'm still that rubbish a romantic propositition that they don't care to see me again.
Ten years ago, at 19, I never really thought about being long term lonely. And when I did I thought it would be pergatory, but I'm really starting to have it grow on me.
To my surprise the heartache's wearing off. Nowadays I see couples and don't get jealous. I can listen to love songs and not feel the desire to change the track and I no longer feel longing at the sight of every nice lady.
But the point is that is this necessarily a good thing? Are my natural defences doing me a true favour by enabling me to relax in whatever clothes and haircut I **** well please, without a worry about what anyone else thinks? And is it good that I have so much more money for hobbies, for example being able to kit out a home recording studio to the gunwhales?
I know the old fashioned spinsters got used to being alone and that enabled them to relax and take life a little easier. But does this store up trouble for later life? Would there, do you think, be a payoff for this kind of denial in the form of a massive loneliness attack when I'm an old man?
I'm alright now, but what about later?
I don't know how many times I've heard the hackneyed excuse that even though I'm the nicest guy they've ever known and would take me as a good friend anyday, etc, I'm still that rubbish a romantic propositition that they don't care to see me again.
Ten years ago, at 19, I never really thought about being long term lonely. And when I did I thought it would be pergatory, but I'm really starting to have it grow on me.
To my surprise the heartache's wearing off. Nowadays I see couples and don't get jealous. I can listen to love songs and not feel the desire to change the track and I no longer feel longing at the sight of every nice lady.
But the point is that is this necessarily a good thing? Are my natural defences doing me a true favour by enabling me to relax in whatever clothes and haircut I **** well please, without a worry about what anyone else thinks? And is it good that I have so much more money for hobbies, for example being able to kit out a home recording studio to the gunwhales?
I know the old fashioned spinsters got used to being alone and that enabled them to relax and take life a little easier. But does this store up trouble for later life? Would there, do you think, be a payoff for this kind of denial in the form of a massive loneliness attack when I'm an old man?
I'm alright now, but what about later?