Mess up

[Thirteen]

There's this girl who used to frequent the bar I was working in. She usually came there with her friend or boyfriend, and we'd always have some small chit chat but nothing further than that. Anyway, a couple of days ago she invited me to this student party. You probably guess what happened, but I must say, I was absolutely in no way interested in her sexually. We did hang out the whole night together with a friend of mine and a friend of hers, and she talked about her long relationship with her boyfriend (she's about twenty and has dated for like 5 years). She told me that she may have wanted to try others but the guy was too perfect for her. Being bitter after my ex-girlfriend, I told her how much better I was off being single, flying from one flower to another and being responsible about my actions to no one. Anyway, it ended up so that we came to my place and went to be. Somehow, I still have no ***** idea why , I put my hand around her and suddenly I realised I'm inside her. No kisses, no oral sex, no words (except when she asked me if I have protection). The sex was bad since we were both drunk, and I passed out.

Anyway, now she has told her BF, her friends etc (but hasn't told that it is me), and she's constantly texting me and asking me to hang out since "I am a part of this problem"...I've been dodging the invites with leaving messages unanswered and saying "You're a strong girl, you'll manage" but I don't know how long can I escape. What should I do in this situation? What am I supposed to say? She's a intelligent and cute in her personality but I have no intention to date her. I feel very depressed, even though I have had sex with other 'reserved' girls. In those situations, I haven't had problems 'getting away'. But this just makes me sad because as I said I knew her as a customer and don't want to hurt her feelings, I just want to get out of this whole mess, forget it and move on. I have no idea what to do. Suddenly I feel like such a dirty b*stard, scum of the earth.

 

[Brian]

The sex was bad since we were both drunk, and I passed out.

Well now, this is just the apex of achievement, isn't it.

I've been dodging the invites with leaving messages unanswered....
I just want to get out of this whole mess, forget it and move on....
I have no idea what to do.....
Suddenly I feel like such a dirty b*stard, scum of the earth....

Well, you should probably own up to it and not try to hide. Actions come with consequences that we have to face and accept. Now, I'm not saying she sounds like the best or the brightest (I have yet to know anyone who frequents bars and -is- the best or brightest), but it wasn't entirely her fault. It takes two to tango, after all.


If you didn't want to get in to a pit of social problems or become the center of some soap-opera drama, maybe you shouldn't have messed a girl with an established relationship.

Accountability and Responsibility are knocking on your door.

 

[Thirteen]

What I did may sound very pathetic and wrong, which I don't deny, but unfortunately, stuff like this is constantly happening, also to other people. I'm not your ideal cute, beautiful inside romantic boy - I'm an egoistic, selfish, all around f**ked up guy, a kind that every philosophy on world despises. I hate my own guts. I guess I'm just too immature. I shake my head with disbelief when I recall everything I've done. Now, I have no problem to go talk to this girl - the problem is that I don't know what to say. I want to say to her that it was a HUGE mistake on my part, that I don't have feelings for her, that I don't want to be the guy for whom she left her perfect BF - I want to say this kindly, in a way that wouldn't hurt her feelings too much. And this is where I ask for advice.

Most of you probably think of me as a lowest creature to walk this Earth, and I have absolutely no right to deny it. I still hope you can get past your loath and at least try to help me out here. I'm just incapable of handling stuff like these.