Rant

[imlikeasilhouette]

Left my job 2 months ago. I didn't even last long, i never thought the reason would be because my panic attacks were becoming more frequent because of the people I had to deal with day by day. My bosses were horrible honeysuckle heads who find it rather amusing to humiliate people in front of the entire people in the office, and not to mention my unpaid hours when I work overtime because of the amount of honeysuckle they ask me to finish last minute. They should start wondering why 7 people quit in a span of a month for pete's sake. *sigh* My dad was right about me being too idealistic, about trying to believe the best in people-- horrible people do exist, I don't need to look too far because they're inside the workplace. Of course they exist, duh. It's not like I'm unaware of that. Life isn't all sunshine and rainbows and fuccckkkkk it's so hard to find a job again. It's sad because I had to leave my coworkers who were actually quite nice, it's sad that this happened.. it bothers me that I'm overwhelmed with anxiety and i feel like I have no future. I feel mediocre at everything, and I don't know which career path to pursue. Ugh

It's hard to feel directionless and worthless all at the same time.

I worry too ******* much. I worry about worrying.

 

[sothatwasmylife]

Sounds harsh....it is harsh....try not to beat yourself up...sounds like others have done that for you...try to be receptive to opportunities that come along...explore what possibilities there are, and try to be kind to yourself...the last person you need giving you a really hard time is yourself.

 

[shadetree]

Sorry about your job and your bosses being dillholes. There really is a lot of people like that. But dont let it discourage you, theres a lot of good people like yourself hiding out amongst all the bad ones too. Life may not be puppies and rainbows but sometimes if you look you can find a silver lining on all those clouds. Theres good in life, and good people too. Dont let life beat you down Things will get better. Im sure youll find a job too, its a pain looking i know, but youll find something. Just stay positive and look at the positives. Ive been in some bad sittuations in life and the only thing i know for sure is the only real control we haver over life is our reaction to sittuations. No matter what. So you can look at this as a failure, or you can look at it as an oppurtunity. In the long run that will make all the difference. At least you dont have to deal with those idiot bosses now right? Hopefully your next job the people running it will be nicer.

 

[Danny1987]

I know exactly how you feel...It's like you described me...

 

[imlikeasilhouette]

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Sounds harsh....it is harsh....try not to beat yourself up...sounds like others have done that for you...try to be receptive to opportunities that come along...explore what possibilities there are, and try to be kind to yourself...the last person you need giving you a really hard time is yourself.

Thanks so much. Some or rather, most days I feel crap. But people like you help and remind me to to be *kinder* to my self, it's horrible to know that my strongest and worst enemy is my self.

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Sorry about your job and your bosses being dillholes. There really is a lot of people like that. But dont let it discourage you, theres a lot of good people like yourself hiding out amongst all the bad ones too. Life may not be puppies and rainbows but sometimes if you look you can find a silver lining on all those clouds. Theres good in life, and good people too. Dont let life beat you down Things will get better. Im sure youll find a job too, its a pain looking i know, but youll find something. Just stay positive and look at the positives. Ive been in some bad sittuations in life and the only thing i know for sure is the only real control we haver over life is our reaction to sittuations. No matter what. So you can look at this as a failure, or you can look at it as an oppurtunity. In the long run that will make all the difference. At least you dont have to deal with those idiot bosses now right? Hopefully your next job the people running it will be nicer.

I agree with you. Thanks for reminding me to focus on the good thing than the bad. Though, of course, it really is hard when your anxiety eat you up than trying to rationalize the situation and understand that things will fine in the end- or that whatever it is that I'm feeling/situation im in right now won't last forever (hopefully).

Sincerely hoping that I find a job soon, and that bosses/people would be.......nicer.....at the very least.

---

I know exactly how you feel...It's like you described me...

Oh, sorry to hear that. How are you though?

 

[sothatwasmylife]

"Strongest and worst enemy". Now that is taking beating yourself up to a totally new level... and not in a good way....be a friend to yourself at least try..don't let others others influence you negatively... and if they do let me know I was thinking of taking up a career as a serial killer anyway and it would be far better to have some suitable targets .

 

[imlikeasilhouette]

"Strongest and worst enemy". Now that is taking beating yourself up to a totally new level... and not in a good way....be a friend to yourself at least try..don't let others others influence you negatively... and if they do let me know I was thinking of taking up a career as a serial killer anyway and it would be far better to have some suitable targets anyway.

It's a bit difficult but I will try my hardest, can't feel/treat my self forever. Otherwise, I'd be miserable. Hahah, let me know if you choose that psychopathic path *I'd rather if you don't*.

Hahaha you don't sound like serial killer though. Thank you for your encouraging words.

 

[sothatwasmylife]

"Strongest and worst enemy". Now that is taking beating yourself up to a totally new level... and not in a good way....be a friend to yourself at least try..don't let others others influence you negatively... and if they do let me know I was thinking of taking up a career as a serial killer anyway and it would be far better to have some suitable targets anyway.

It's a bit difficult but I will try my hardest, can't feel/treat my self forever. Otherwise, I'd be miserable. Hahah, let me know if you choose that psychopathic path *I'd rather if you don't*.

Hahaha you don't sound like serial killer though. Thank you for your encouraging words.

Well you know hours to suit...it's not weather dependent...and your not committed to a standard format....and we all need an interest in life..it's just so difficult to motivate though...and the expence, knives, ropes, custom made garrot the list is sodding endless

 

[imlikeasilhouette]

"Strongest and worst enemy". Now that is taking beating yourself up to a totally new level... and not in a good way....be a friend to yourself at least try..don't let others others influence you negatively... and if they do let me know I was thinking of taking up a career as a serial killer anyway and it would be far better to have some suitable targets anyway.

It's a bit difficult but I will try my hardest, can't feel/treat my self forever. Otherwise, I'd be miserable. Hahah, let me know if you choose that psychopathic path *I'd rather if you don't*.

Hahaha you don't sound like serial killer though. Thank you for your encouraging words.

Well you know hours to suit...it's not weather dependent...and your not committed to a standard format....and we all need an interest in life..it's just so difficult to motivate though...and the expence, knives, ropes, custom made garrot the list is sodding endless

Nothing ever motivates me at this point.

I am doomed hahaha.
My myy. )

 

[sothatwasmylife]

Doomed I can relate to that....when even the prospect of taking up an occupation that in many ways would allow for boundless creativity such as serial killing ,fails to motivate...things do seem devoid of meaning...oh well there are always small worthwhile things...like theTinariwen cd I'm listening to combined with the bottle of wine I'm necking...and things suddenly seem a little less bleak

 

[imlikeasilhouette]

Doomed I can relate to that....when even the prospect of taking up an occupation that in many ways would allow for boundless creativity such as serial killing ,fails to motivate...things do seem devoid of meaning...oh well there are always small worthwhile things...like theTinariwen cd I'm listening to combined with the bottle of wine I'm necking...and things suddenly seem a little less bleak

That's sounded brutally poetic. Are you sincerely even planning to annihilate certain people? It bothers me how brutal our minds can get and the amount of self control we have. Haha.

I am listening to a good amount of silence, things are okay tonight.

 

[sothatwasmylife]

No not at all....just have an unfortunate sense of humour