The fine print of "just be yourself"

[Siertes]

So what are people really saying when throwing out this generic line? Does it conflict with them also saying to work towards improving yourself? Where is the fine line between improvements and a complete change in self identity?

When I hear someone say "just be yourself", usually from one stranger to another, I imagine them meaning to simply be confident of who you are, your interests and the like, and people will be drawn to you. I can understand that despite the assumption the everyone deep down is desireable on some level. But what about those of us who arent confident? Who are never sure? When uncertainty is a key aspect of ourselves?

I'm never sure of anything. I'm always questioning my own thoughts and actions and have a hard tine commiting to things due to the fleeting nature of.. well everything. I realize that makes me quite unattractive to a whole score of humanity, if my life thus far is any indication, but I feel thats a key part of who I am. Should I change this part of me to satisfy everyone? Why does bejng uncertain have to be a negative? Why does "be yourself" fly out the window when the masses decide certain aspects are undesireable?

Who's making these rules that everyone is spouting without really thinking about the full depth of what they're saying?

I am myself! I've been myself all my life and have turned out the only way I could have given MY personal choices.

Blah I'm trailing off into a rant...

Just clarify what you feel these words mean to you. Meaningless platitudes or genuine calls to unleashing that special person within?

 

[TropicalStarfish]

Don't worry about it. Just be yourself. You're still young.

People try to be nice and that is okay.

 

[9006]

I think you're over thinking this well known phrase, it's basically just saying don't try too hard, let it happen in your natural way, etc etc. It may not actually be about you having to change something, more like you feel you have to and do it automatically.

I'm never sure of anything. I'm always questioning my own thoughts and actions and have a hard tine commiting to things due to the fleeting nature of.. well everything. I realize that makes me quite unattractive to a whole score of humanity

I'm not sure who you've been speaking to but this doesn't sound like a negative at all, it's this kind of stuff that makes you.. you.

 

[Siertes]

I think you're over thinking this well known phrase, it's basically just saying don't try too hard, let it happen in your natural way, etc etc. It may not actually be about you having to change something, more like you feel you have to and do it automatically.

I'm never sure of anything. I'm always questioning my own thoughts and actions and have a hard tine commiting to things due to the fleeting nature of.. well everything. I realize that makes me quite unattractive to a whole score of humanity

I'm not sure who you've been speaking to but this doesn't sound like a negative at all, it's this kind of stuff that makes you.. you.

Can I claim overthinking as who I am as well or is it too late? You may be right though. That phrase has bugged me for so long...

 

[daughter of the moon]

Earlier I was going to jokingly (?) respond that over thinking is just you being you Obviously, it's not a bad trait. Not always

 

[Jonzee]

So what are people really saying when throwing out this generic line?

Usually it means don't try to act any differently than you normally would. Sometimes when a person meets a new group of people they will copy their mannerisms or act \ talk in a way that's not really them. People sometimes behave this way as a means of seeking acceptance but it is usually a lie built on a lie and that will always leave you unhappy.

Being yourself means showing people as you are all the time.

 

[Siertes]

Earlier I was going to jokingly (?) respond that over thinking is just you being you Obviously, it's not a bad trait. Not always

Usually when something has the side note of "not always", I fall onto the negative side of that XD

So what are people really saying when throwing out this generic line?

Usually it means don't try to act any differently than you normally would. Sometimes when a person meets a new group of people they will copy their mannerisms or act \ talk in a way that's not really them. People sometimes behave this way as a means of seeking acceptance but it is usually a lie built on a lie and that will always leave you unhappy.

Being yourself means showing people as you are all the time.

I guess it really is as simple as that.

 

[Peaches]

it is an accessory fact worth mentioning that, generally speaking, to be oneself one needs to know who one is…

not saying at all this applies to you, Siertes, just thinking of some people I know who spend a lot of time denying themselves self expression and feelings

 

[a lonely person]

it is an accessory fact worth mentioning that, generally speaking, to be oneself one needs to know who one is…

not saying at all this applies to you, Siertes, just thinking of some people I know who spend a lot of time denying themselves self expression and feelings

Thats confusing, as you can never be anything else other than yourself. Probably there is a better way to say whatever you mean by that.
For example when you say "denying themselves" you dont mean anyone is denying themself entirely, as that doesnt makes sense either, so if you mean denying feelings why dont you just say that?