Broken heart said:
But if you are physically able, try to take up a sport..and better yet sthg like martial arts.
I think it will be a great help. Although I know that "getting up" itself might be a problem.
Yea, it would be, since I lost my legs in NAM...
Jk.. lol.. Still got my legs, but I do got a bad SI joint, so sadly martial arts is off the table. As for sports, I was turned off of those at an early age. Due to my slow processing power, I was never good at the whole ,tossing to the right team, thing; unless they had easily distinguishable shirts or markers of some kind. So with that said, I was always the last one picked. And yea, someone is always going to be the last one, that's just logic, but what hit me was when the team captains started arguing after about who HAD to take me.. I was that kid that would sit at the edge of the park at recess just hoping that the tether-ball would free up (since that was the one thing I could do on my own).
TheRealCallie said:
As a side note, I can tell you that anger will only drag you down deeper. It helps to keep depression and sadness at bay, but it will eat you alive. You need to find a way to let go of the anger. You need to find a way to let go of the resentment and hate. And after that, you need to find a way to move beyond the depression.
That's not really the order that it works in for me. Anger isn't used to cover up or mitigate depression; it's what forms from the depression and frustration. I don't like anger and generally try to avoid it. My mother was a very angry person. But when, no matter what I do, nothing works out. I just want to scream.. When I can't figure out where I'm going wrong and no one wants to tell me; because, god forbid, that would go against the Canadian politeness quota, and someone won't get their much needed vanity points.. When your entire life is a perpetual contradiction, it's hard not to get angry or be driven insane/catatonic. It's like trying to go into the kitchen when I was a kid and mother was making dinner. I stand a moment, she whips around, nearly runs into me, yells "get the fresia out of my way", I try, nervously, to do just that, and end up walking in the direction she's going and she gets even more pissed off. That's been like, an example of my entire life. No matter what choices I make, the outcome is always worse..
I\ said:
I'm an Optimistic Pessimist. I'm absolutely POSITIVE that it's all going to go horribly wrong...
Sorry, just had to comment on your sig. That's called being a realist. When statistically speaking, it has always gone wrong, it would be highly illogical to assume it would do otherwise. My take on it is to hope for the best, prepare for the worst.
TheRealCallie said:
I\ said:
TheRealCallie said:
While I mostly agree with what you said, at some point you have to let go of the anger or you will never move passed it. Anger, in my opinion allows whatever the issue is to have control over you. So by continuing to be angry at his parents, his parents still have power over him. By staying angry at the situation, it has power over him. In my experience, unless you let the anger go, life will not get any better.
Absolutely agree with you. You SHOULD let go of the anger. But I think the first step in doing that is to ACCEPT that the anger is normal. Work out what to do with it and THEN you can start to move past it. I was mostly talking about the beginning stages rather than the full set because it had already been covered earlier. Sorry if I wasn't being clear.
No, I get it. The problem is, I think the OP is well beyond the beginning stages from what he's said in this and other posts, so I just wanted to chime in and bring up more of the end stage.
Naw, I think he was closer to correct on this one. You can't just let go of anger in the same way that you can't just let go of depression or anxiety. You need to first deal with the cause before you can remedy the effect. To suggest otherwise is like telling someone with a big splinter in their foot to just deal with the pain, lol. Gotta get that splinter out first or it's not really gonna work in the end. Too often people run to the fire and start spraying water at the flames, it's just bad psychology.
Honestly, for me, it's not a matter of not being able to work out the best route to recovery, but more of dealing with too many unpredictable variables. It's like drowning in dark waters and not knowing which way is up. ya spend so much time swimming and eventually just get tired when you find yourself no closer to the surface.