Too many akward moments

[Mooosic]

When I talk to people, it's ALWAYS akward!! I'm afraid that I don't know how to conversate! Anyone else have way too many akward moments??

 

[I'm Fine]

Yes. Yes I do. I tend to get so nervous that I either babble like a complete idiot or can't talk at all.

 

[Yeah!]

My voice goes all squeeky, like it hasn't broken yet, and my limbs are like "fresia you, brain, we will do what we want!" It's like everything, I guess. Practice makes at the very least better.

 

[athwart]

Yes. If I feel awkward, I try to get the other person to talk about themself. People like to talk about themselves. Ask a question about the person that they cannot answer with a yes or a no. That's what I do. It shifts the pressure away from you. If all else fails, pretend you got a cell phone call and make a graceful exit to regroup.

 

[Badjedidude]

Awkwardness can be endearing sometimes.

 

[fortasse]

Awkwardness can be endearing sometimes.

except when it's not.

 

[boodika]

Awkwardness can be endearing sometimes.

except when it's not.

There's the geeky akwardness that can be endearing, but that's very rare, and usually portrayed on TV... then there's the akwardness that I feel when a conversation doesn't seem to flow naturally and it feels a bit.... 'ok then, well...... *silence*'

Akward.

 

[Yeah!]

Yes. If I feel awkward, I try to get the other person to talk about themself. People like to talk about themselves. Ask a question about the person that they cannot answer with a yes or a no. That's what I do. It shifts the pressure away from you. If all else fails, pretend you got a cell phone call and make a graceful exit to regroup.

Fantastic advice.

 

[SherryGee]

I glad I am not alone, so often I don't really know what to say so I ended up making stuff up as I go along just because I hate awkward silences.

 

[TheSolitaryMan]

I tend to take a short while to work up my courage, then I will step forward and confidently smile at a potential friend/love of my life.

"Hey there!" *big smile*

They will, without doubt, reply positively.

Then, I will not know what to say and I feel the nerves coming back again. This will lead to a meandering and usually dull conversation, and I will 9 times out of 10 not get their phone number and snogging is 100% off the odds books

So far I have not found a way to circumvent this inevitable ritual.

 

[A new life]

No matter who you are
No matter what you say
Some people will look at you funny
Some people will belittle you
Some people will simply ignore you
Some trolls will put you down on forums like this.

But when you encounter those rare individuals who aren't trying
to take their misery out on you, IT'S MAGIC!
Some people are fun and playful
Some are helpful
Some are kind

I make it a point to strike up a conversation with someone every time I go to the grocery store.
I'll ask someone "have you ever tried this before?"
Or I'll say "aren't those delicious?"
Some people make my day, sometimes I make their day (with a joke or something)
Sometimes I just get in a little practice talking to strangers.

Just keep trying.
Good luck

 

[lone_drow]

Hi Mooosic. Guess I can relate to your situation. Just curious, are you afraid that perhaps the person you are talking to might judge you?

Good suggestion from athwart.

 

[paulo]

just asking questions about them works for me up to a point.
so i usually just ask untill they told me everything they wanne tell me.
than the awkwardness sets in

also i dont like talking about nothing just for the sake of a conversation.
i cant do it and it doesnt really make sense to me.
why talk when you have nothing to say.

i can be perfectly fine with being around people and not talking at all.
seems to creep people out though

 

[Tiina63]

I am exactly like this is situations where I want to make a good impression. Usually on dates or when in a group of people whose opinions of me matter to me. I talked to a nice woman this morning who I had not met before and we started talking about online dating and I told her how awkward I find it becuase of the whole small talk thing. She said to me just to talk to men on dates in the same way I was chatting to her, but the only reason I could talk to her so easily was because I felt no need to impress her or to make her like me.

 

[nerdygirl]

While I enjoy conversations in spurts, I generally don't like to talk. People always think I'm shy or uncomfortable, but I just don't like the act of speaking. Because of this, I've never really developed a skill for conversation. So I understand the awkward silences. I'm a very private person, so I feel rude asking people to talk about themselves. For anybody like me, you might want to have kind of a mental list of random things to talk about. Sometimes, you can get a surprising amount of response to things you didn't think would be interesting. If you look at some of our thread topics here, you'll see what I mean!

 

[happyman]

Yeah it sucks. For example you are in a group and they start talking about sport, and you are like oh god get me the hell out of here. No offense, but I have never followed sport. Or another situation is, I would rather sit alone, then hear people with their Saturday night hangover stories, and how they vomited all over the car.

I find it really hard talking to people cause I dont have many interests, and I try and ask questions, but sometimes I get bored of what they are saying, so prefer to be alone. Sucks, I know, but what can you do.

 

[jjam]

depth of knowledge on a subject + common interest in that subject = one smooth conversation on the subject

I am highly taciturn, but this never fails for me. It could be someone I'd never met before and we can talk well face to face IF I am confident in what I know of the subject AND the other person actually cares about the subject too.

The tricky part is finding that sweet combination...