I'm a recoverying alcoholic/addict. Recovery is possiable....if I want it.
I've been on the giving end and recieving end.
My ex-gf relasped after 7 years into our relationship..She changed in a major psycho *****.
Truama, dramma, chaos...the whole nine yards. The last 5 years of that relationship tored
me up. The cops came to our house...too many times.
There was absolutely nothing I could do...I tired everything under the sun.
She had to want to get clean and sober for herself.
There was so much chaso and dystructions..she can't bare to face me.
As a recoverying alcoholic/addict myself...one of the many things that i had to aside from not
using was also stop hanging around people that were drinking and using.
Recovery has to do alot more than abstance
I'm also ACOA...bascailly I grew up in a dysfunctional family.
My father is a major alcoholic and my mother is co-dependent.
no..I didn't grow up in a trailer park...We live in a big ass house with a lot of stuff, in the nice part of town.
Looking good on the outside and all messed up on the inside...
That's also a figure of speach....because I felt really, really all fresia up inside...with plenty of money, drinking buddies and
women throwning themselves at me....Too bad it stopped working...especailly the part of women throwing themselves at me
They all totally blew my fucken mind and then some..I had to get really, really messed up and check the fresia out.
I saw the world through fractured rose coloured glasses.
I didn't really wanted to come back to reality...because mohter ******* were saying Jesue was going to comeback..And
I wasn't good enough to go to heaven...
Well, fresia me with a screw driver..I belive Jesus got reincarnated as my father...Nothing I did was good enough for him either.
And my mother is a fucken NONE....you can't do non of this. you can't non of that...becuase ya never know what ya going get with dad..
No wonder I be fresia up in the head.....How in the fresia can i be good at anything if I can't do nothing....ERRRR!!!!!! Talk about giving me mixed signals...
Walking on eggshells all the time....I took on the role of the lost neglected fucken child.
I swear to ya...there was a big ass fucken elephant in the living room and it scared the living honeysuckle out of ma...
No friends wanted to come to my fucken house and visit...Only pyscho bitches that wanted to fresia my brains out becuase she didn't want to go home
to her lovely pink fucken elephant either...
I hitted a bottom at a very young age. I lost my wife and child. Most of all I lost myself.
I love my ex-wf very much. I nevered want to hurt her. I messed up that relationship
I'm grateful she a part of my life today. Sometimes it's not easy to clean up my mess...
That's why some people don't like AA/NA/ACOA/AL-anon....12 steps based recovery program...
It's not just not using...and it's not the GOD thing...becuase you don't have to beliving in god or a HP to work the 12 steps...
It's making it right... making amends, paying restitutions, cleaning up the freaken mess that you cuased while you were messed up out of your fucken mind...