What if things will never change?

[Cold]

Hey guys

I feel so lonely and I want to commit suicide. But everyone tells me to wait and that it will get better. But I don't think it will and I can't cope now. My social anxiety makes it impossible for me to talk to anyone, I can't even talk to people online and it's killing me. I write fake suicide letters online just to get attention and I know that's wrong but it's the only attention I get. No one loves me, I'm failing at school and I'm never happy. I just don't see the point anymore, I feel like it's never gonna change. And lately when I listen to music I don't feel any emotion like I used to, and it's something I can't live without. Is there any hope?

 

[Melanie]

There's always hope...

 

[Flood]

Oh course there is hope. Nothing lasts forever including the way you are currently feeling. Just try and weather the storm and you will see better times.

 

[Van Hooligan X]

Hey guys

I feel so lonely and I want to commit suicide. But everyone tells me to wait and that it will get better. But I don't think it will and I can't cope now. My social anxiety makes it impossible for me to talk to anyone, I can't even talk to people online and it's killing me. I write fake suicide letters online just to get attention and I know that's wrong but it's the only attention I get. No one loves me, I'm failing at school and I'm never happy. I just don't see the point anymore, I feel like it's never gonna change. And lately when I listen to music I don't feel any emotion like I used to, and it's something I can't live without. Is there any hope?

You're in the same position as me my friend .

it sucks balls i know, and i'm not gunna pump the disney honeysuckle of 'believe in hope and faith and tim burton will become santa again'...


BUT i'll say carry on, maybe trying to find new music will work out a little, did for me for a little while anyway.

the reason i say carry on is because life is an annoying son of a *****...BUT a kind son of a ***** sometimes, for all you know you could find the right women tomorrow, anyone could...


plus stay on ALL, tis fun to annoy a few ppl it's worth living just for that...RIGHT STEEL :d

 

[Nyktimos]

for all you know you could find the right women tomorrow, anyone could...

This may be a little optimistic in the short term. Perhaps just one right woman would do for now. At least for practice untill you can find the five or six you need.

I'm feeling much the same these days. I don't feel the world has anything to offer me, or that I have anything to offer the world. The things I used to enjoy just seem pointless and unrewarding now. I don't know what is supposed to change either. Of course, as long as there is life there is hope. Everything changes in time; that's just the way the world works.

At least you seem to recognise you need some kind of help. I've recognised that fact, but sitting in front of a doctor trying to explain that I'm depressed is a step I'm too full of anxiety to take. If you need to post suicide notes to get attention, go ahead. But folks here are usually pretty good at giving you attention when you need it. So stick around for a bit.

 

[Van Hooligan X]

for all you know you could find the right women tomorrow, anyone could...

This may be a little optimistic in the short term. Perhaps just one right woman would do for now. At least for practice untill you can find the five or six you need.

I'm feeling much the same these days. I don't feel the world has anything to offer me, or that I have anything to offer the world. The things I used to enjoy just seem pointless and unrewarding now. I don't know what is supposed to change either. Of course, as long as there is life there is hope. Everything changes in time; that's just the way the world works.

At least you seem to recognise you need some kind of help. I've recognised that fact, but sitting in front of a doctor trying to explain that I'm depressed is a step I'm too full of anxiety to take. If you need to post suicide notes to get attention, go ahead. But folks here are usually pretty good at giving you attention when you need it. So stick around for a bit.

hmm, do you think us 3 should make a club?
with hookers and blackjack! ...although the last 1 is optional i guess

 

[ledchick]

well I go through the no hope for me now phase....hell my psychiatrist told me on my last visit that there was no hope for me...that left me sitting in my car crying for half an hour and wondering after, how a doctor could say that to a person. I am still here though! I wonder often ,how long I will make it and in the end I make it much longer than I ever think. If I wager against myself ,I always lose, so apparently I am stronger than I think I am. I think we all are, on this site. But coming here and being able to vent, express,, be happy, sad, mad or whatever it is we are does help.
If I can do this, ANYONE can, I have made it 39 years through this crap called life and I am still doing it, I hold out hope that I am here because I have some higher purpose and I know I will never know what it is but that it just IS.

 

[Nyktimos]

hmm, do you think us 3 should make a club?
with hookers and blackjack! ...although the last 1 is optional i guess

Sounds good. We could call it the Blackjack Club, out of a sense of irony.

well I go through the no hope for me now phase....hell my psychiatrist told me on my last visit that there was no hope for me...that left me sitting in my car crying for half an hour and wondering after, how a doctor could say that to a person. I am still here though! I wonder often ,how long I will make it and in the end I make it much longer than I ever think. If I wager against myself ,I always lose, so apparently I am stronger than I think I am. I think we all are, on this site. But coming here and being able to vent, express,, be happy, sad, mad or whatever it is we are does help.
If I can do this, ANYONE can, I have made it 39 years through this crap called life and I am still doing it, I hold out hope that I am here because I have some higher purpose and I know I will never know what it is but that it just IS.

You need a new psychiatrist! Unless he was trying to shock you into some revelation, I can't imagine why he would say that. You are a tower of strength on this site, I'm sure everyone will agree. Whatever your higher purpose, you have a family who I'm sure love you, as do we.

 

[JustJones]

When you feel hopeless, the easiest thing to do is to give up. The problem is that giving up gets you nowhere. You need to be proactive and begin to take action against all your problems. I'm just learning that all those popular people with girlfriends don't just get it handed to them on a plate, (well, maybe some do) they are the ones who feel the doubt but fight through it all the same. This is the attitude I recently adopted when I was feeling similar to you and now I have a sexy Asian girlfriend. I'm not bragging here, it's just to show you that it is DEFINITELY possible to dig yourself out of that hole!!

 

[Lonesome Crow]

It changes when you want it to change.

Like Nykitomos said...whatever your higher purpose is.

To be born into this life a rearity...The lesson and experince you go through is a gift.

Sometimes we go through very painful experince as we grow.

Sometimes we go through a spiritaul or consious death..as we let go of old ideas and are reborned into a new awarness.

Some people go through a near death experince...others gose through a mental and emotional buttom.
such as wanting to end thier lives..
They become transended in the process.

They're many that had gone through this...
And a lot of members on this site.

Such as ...A famouse musician.

He wanted to committ suicide as a young man while he was signing in a smoking bar room.
His gf ran out on him. He was broke and his music career and life seem to go no where.
It was not his hopes and dream to live life like that. No love. no hope..no luck...etc
He hitted a bottom.

He checked in a hospital...The Doctor didn't do anything to him
He stay in the hospital for a month. While in his stay he notice
the crazy...crazy people. The actual crazy people with brain damage from accidents..etc
Their bodily function didn't work correctly...they couldn't think correctly, speak correctly.

He had an awakening...He realized his gift. What he still has and is capiable of doing.
After that moment his pursued his dream. His dream was to play his music in stadiums
in front of tens of thousands of people. His name is Billy Joe.

The owner of an NFL team also had a simular experince. At the age of over 40 he lost
everything.. Wosrt, he was in dept. He didn't know how he was going to be able to
take care of his family or get out of millions of dallors he was in depted to.
He wanted to die...
well...he figure...fresia it..from that moment he figure if he was going died and he bascially
died already (old life style)...He followed his dream...He bascailly live his life acording to
his purpose and ignore those that told him that he counldn't.
If people wants to talk to dead...They can talk to the dead.(his old self)...
He was NOW in the land of the living...Truely living.

Even the lead singer from Mettalica (James) suffers through a lot of depression.
I like to read his bio or book one of these day.

Even the VP of the USA today...Joe Biden.
His family were killed in an auto accident...The poeple he loved the most ..His wife and children.

Even the ex president of the UAS. George W Bush.
He was only a saleman at Sears..and life totally sucked ass for him
He had a drinking problem and dug himself a hole....with no hope in site.
He hitted sometype of bottom. GWB is a recoverying alcoholic...
You might love or you might hate him . You might even think he's stupid.
But it is this...He followed his dreams and ignore the sons of bitches that told him he couldn't.

Even the Wright Bros...just a couple of bikecycle makers...Even the the US government deemed
flight for man was imposible. They got mocked, made fun of. People thought they were fools and crazy.
One of the brothers sufferes from a physical illness which he died from shortly after WWII.
He struggle with he illness but never gave up on his dream. He purpose in life.
Through it all...he followed his dream. .Experincing failures after failures. Let downs after let downs.
Flight for man is posible and fresia what people thinks.

Ozzy...he had no future growning up in liverpool. What he saw was jail, death or just being a mill worker.
He had a dream though. A big big dream.

Steve Via...Steve grew up in a dyfuctional childhood. His parents were alcoholics.
He lived through chaos, abuse and insanity. Kids made fun of him while he was growning up.
He had a very, very big dream.

Marlin Manson...he was total freak and outcast growning up
Poeple made fun of him while growning up.
People stll makes fun of him today and he's still a freak.
Oh fucken well...He had his purpose and pursued it.

Even Simmon...one the judges that people love to hate on Americain's idol..lmao
He lost everthing and had to moved back in with his parents in his 30's.
He hitted sometype of a buttom and life was messed up for him..
Evidently...no babes came over to his parent's pad while he was living there.
Something deep inside of him...the pains, lost hopes...etc
Whatever it was...he grew out of that and became a better person and found his purpose.

Even jay Leno..He was sleeping in his car

Even a couple of my HS friends.
One of my friend is a movie actor...He's been in many, many films. And even had a major role.
He's currenlty is a producer. He brought the entire filming crew with some famouse faces to shot
some scenes in his movie at our work place not too long ago.
I remember him being totally down and out....Dress in rags. His father wouldn't help him. He was homeless
and penniless. He sold coffee at his father's place of bussiness just to make a dallor.
His father was my boss.lmao

Even my HS buddy Dino...his mother died during his senoir year in HS.
Something clicked inside of him through sufferin the lost of his mother...it changed him.
Dino plays in Fear Factory...and nope..he sure as hell dosn't fit the appreance of the good looking people..lol

 

[Nyktimos]

This is the attitude I recently adopted when I was feeling similar to you and now I have a sexy Asian girlfriend. I'm not bragging here, it's just to show you that it is DEFINITELY possible to dig yourself out of that hole!!

Brag away; you've earned it! Be proud of yourself. I wish you both the very best.

Ozzy...he had no future growning up in liverpool. What he saw was jail, death or just being a mill worker.
He had a dream though. A big big dream.

Unless you mean a different Ozzy, His Metal Highness Ozzy Osbourne of Brum is a Brummie, from Birmingham.

All good points though. Things change over time for all of us.