What would you never tell him or her?

[perfanoff]

You're dating someone - but it's not a relationship (yet?)

What would you NOT tell them?

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For me, most often it's a "don't tell me you love me because you don't know me" and vice versa, "don't expect me to say I love you before I know YOU".

 

[painter's radio]

I wouldn't be dating someone who didn't know who I was.

But I guess I would not tell them right away that 2 years ago I took a huge overdose and tore my arms to honeysuckle trying to kill myself. That would probably scare them away. Or cue a very unhealthy relationship revolving around codependency and emotional blackmail.

Either that or the fact that when I was kid, I caught a toad in a glass jar and then threw it against a wall as hard as I could. I'm not sure which one I'm more ashamed of, tbh.

 

[Veruca]

Whoa Painter. I'm just glad you're okay now. *hugs*

I wouldn't tell them immediately about my insecurities until I'm fairly certain they aren't going to use them against me.

And depending on how confident and experienced the guy is, I would be careful when talking about my practically non-existent dating life. I wouldn't want the guy to think that there was something wrong with me and that's why I'm single (though in reality there probably is! )

 

[Regumika]

I think there isn't anything to hide. And you should tell them (obviously, dont tell them like.. everything, since bombarding them with info isn't good either) but dont purposely hide stuff.

I believe people already have a decision made for a lot of things in life. Though one may think otherwise, when push comes to shove and you are put on the spot. You will make the same decision no matter how you came to the situation.

Say you start dating, and tell them on the first date that you arent into sex. their reaction is the same if you told them after dating for a year and telling them you aren't into sex. It will hurt a lot less if you just tell them upfront, than to waste an entire year.

 

[EveWasFramed]

You only tell people what you're comfortable telling them, relationship or not. Just my opinion.

 

[duff]

it's not something i really think about. Only been 'dating' for 3 months in my life.

which is 0.8% of my adult life !

 

[9006]

I wouldn't tell them that I love wearing hawaiian shirts around the house.

 

[Veruca]

I wouldn't tell them that I love wearing hawaiian shirts around the house.

But I love those

 

[ladyforsaken]

Awwww ^ she's so in love.

 

[Okiedokes]

I think the more I get to know someone, the closer we get, the more I share with them. It takes good communication and trust. The same goes for friends. If I'm with someone, I don't have much to hide if anything. I'd rather have someone know and accept the real me than feel like I have to hide things from them.

 

[perfanoff]

That I dislike the following and if I'm aware they use it, it would not only be a deal-breaker, but also cause me to despise them.

Doublespeak is language that deliberately disguises, distorts, or reverses the meaning of words. Doublespeak may take the form of euphemisms (e.g., "downsizing" for layoffs, "servicing the target" for bombing [1]), in which case it is primarily meant to make the truth sound more palatable. It may also refer to intentional ambiguity in language or to actual inversions of meaning (for example, naming a state of war "peace"). In such cases, doublespeak disguises the nature of the truth.

What's wrong with me? The harshest truth sounds better than the best lie to my ears.

 

[ladyforsaken]

I think the more I get to know someone, the closer we get, the more I share with them. It takes good communication and trust. The same goes for friends. If I'm with someone, I don't have much to hide if anything. I'd rather have someone know and accept the real me than feel like I have to hide things from them.

I totally agree with Okiedokes.

 

[Moe]

I would not tell her that I used to skip classes and go to the Pc games center . Sorry girl but you're stuck with a weirdo hahha

 

[Medusa's Heart]

What's wrong with me? The harshest truth sounds better than the best lie to my ears.

Absolutely nothing - it's a preference.

I agree. Sometimes it's necessary to soften the truth, depending on the situation and the person. But personally, I would rather have someone be straightforward, even if it's unpleasant, than feed me some BS white lie. I am mature enough, and strong enough to handle the truth.

That said, I realize that's not how the real-world works. I read somewhere that the average person lies at least 10 times a day. I find that hard to believe, really. But lying is a necessary "social lubricant"... and not everyone is the same. Sometimes it's best just not to say anything at all, if feel you have to lie. There's a time and place for "brutal honesty" as well.

But for someone who's going to be close to me, I'd rather they be on the straightforward side - with a healthy measure of commonsense to keep their opinion in check as well!

This turned into quite the ramble! Hopefully it makes sense.

 

[kamya]

What's wrong with me? The harshest truth sounds better than the best lie to my ears.

You aren't alone. I don't care how bad it stings, don't lie or avoid something just because it makes YOU uncomfortable. >> Just tell the truth ffs and stop being a selfish *******.

I wouldn't tell them how much time I spend alone. Unless they already knew me for a long time and they already know. I wouldn't tell them anything about my financial situation or how much I make.

 

[Sarah_Lbnz]

Things about my old life, in which I was a different person, in a scary and sick underworld. Some things are better left in the past.

 

[Rosebolt]

You aren't alone. I don't care how bad it stings, don't lie or avoid something just because it makes YOU uncomfortable. >> Just tell the truth ffs and stop being a selfish *******.

^This.

And to be on topic, i would never tell them i'm interested in serial killers/schoot shooters.

 

[perfanoff]

Thank you Medusa, kamya, Rosebolt, for accepting this part of me. I do realize it's not the most popular thing in the world.

And Medusa you make perfect sense to me.

 

[Rosebolt]

Thank you Medusa, kamya, Rosebolt, for accepting this part of me. I do realize it's not the most popular thing in the world.

It's not popular because people are shallow. They put their life all in temporary things. A temporary night drinking. A temporary "quicky." And that includes sugar coating of the truth, because, at that time it just sounds "better". That is true weakness, at least to me.

 

[Limlim]

I would probably hide my magic the gathering cards until a little later on in the relationship >.>