feeling sad

[Elaeagnus]

I'm feeling really down today. My cat died a few weeks ago, and it's hitting me hard right now. I had her for seventeen years, since the day she was born actually. I've been doing pretty well with it overall, but sometimes the grief just hits me full force, and I can't do anything to make it better. I know time will help, but I don't like waiting.

As it turns out, I also don't like coming home to an empty house, sleeping alone, not having anyone to talk to, and not being able to do all the other things I used to do with her. I've never actually lived completely alone. I've always had pets, and now I don't. It's definitely rough. Sigh.

 

[Princess Cleocatra]

***hugs***

 

[Jeremi]

I'm sorry to hear that, about your cat. My dog also became 17 years, until we had to put her to sleep last year. She was a part of our family, and it hurt a lot. I know how you feel. I'll always remember her, but today I can look back at all our years together and smile. I hope that you will be able to do that in time. I'll always be grateful for that time

When I was new here, I got the link to a beautiful poem from a member. Tears are guaranteed, but I suggest you read it.

http://www.rainbowbridge.com/Poem.htm

 

[Elaeagnus]

Thanks guys. I've had lots of other pets pass away, including two other cats that I had for over 15 years. So I'm pretty used to my reactions and how I feel in these situations. There's not much to do but sit back and wait out the waves of sadness when they come. I'm already feeling better.

 

[NeverMore]

I'm sorry to hear that

17 years is a long healthy life for a cat and sounds like she had a loving companion to keep her happy through it

 

[Skorian]

I have a cat who is 17 too

 

[Bluey]

When I was new here, I got the link to a beautiful poem from a member. Tears are guaranteed, but I suggest you read it.

http://www.rainbowbridge.com/Poem.htm

That is a pretty nice poem. I hope its like that as I had a dog that was only one week younger then me and she died or want to rainbow heaven after 17 years.

I went fro a lot of crap when I was younger and had to stay at home a lot and a lot of the time I was on my own as well. To have a dog or cat that you love very much is something that can be a very supportive thing. I still miss her.

That rainbow sight is a nice sight as well.

Elaeagnus you should go and get another cat. OK its not going to replace the one you just lost. But you well learn to love it in a different way. Also there is always one that needs a good home.

 

[Elaeagnus]

Elaeagnus you should go and get another cat. OK its not going to replace the one you just lost. But you well learn to love it in a different way. Also there is always one that needs a good home.

Yeah, that's what everyone keeps telling me. It's definitely a popular opinion. I think for me personally, it wouldn't be a healthy thing to go right out and get another cat. It wouldn't help me grieve; it would just make me push aside my feelings and not deal with them. I'm sure I'll get more pets eventually, but right now it wouldn't be good for me emotionally. And I don't think it would be fair to the new cat either. To each his own, I guess.

 

[Minus]

I am sorry to hear about your cat. That is difficult.

 

[Bluey]

Elaeagnus you should go and get another cat. OK its not going to replace the one you just lost. But you well learn to love it in a different way. Also there is always one that needs a good home.

Yeah, that's what everyone keeps telling me. It's definitely a popular opinion. I think for me personally, it wouldn't be a healthy thing to go right out and get another cat. It wouldn't help me grieve; it would just make me push aside my feelings and not deal with them. I'm sure I'll get more pets eventually, but right now it wouldn't be good for me emotionally. And I don't think it would be fair to the new cat either. To each his own, I guess.

Why is that? Is it cos you would feel guilty getting another one right now? Somehow you might feel that you have betrayed your last cat? You have a lot of love to gave to an animal. And there is a lot of deserving cats out there that need another home. I would say that if you did get another one you should not feel guilty cos of that and it surely dose not take any of the love you held for your friend that has passed to the other side. It is at moments like this where a friendly feline makes us feel wonted. Also I think when you see the one that you would be giving such a loving home to am sure. Also sure that you would not gave any less love then he/she deserves. But of course you know your self better then I or anyone here.

Acutely cleo (Princess Cleocatra) has cats. She would be a good person to talk to about this. I know from being her friend how much she gets from her feline friends

 

[Elaeagnus]

No, it doesn't have anything to do with guilt. To me, each and every pet is an individual, and if I take a cat into my home, I feel like I'm forming a very personal, unique, long-lasting relationship. I wouldn't be able to properly start such a relationship or do justice to the type of bond I like to form with my pets if I were still grieving over my last cat. I'd end up caught between trying to deal with my feelings of grief and trying to maneuver through building the framework of my new relationship with the new cat. If I tried to do both at once, I'd fail. So I'd end up hurting myself and not having the sort of relationship I like to have with my pets.

It's sort of similar to the idea of rebound relationships. If you're not fully over an ex, you can't really commit to a new relationship, right? So if you're on the rebound, it usually won't work out. (Or so I've heard. My experience is limited to books and movies )

Anyway, I know that I'm much closer to my pets than most people are, so I certainly don't expect others to share my opinions. I just know what's right for me.

Elaeagnus you should go and get another cat. OK its not going to replace the one you just lost. But you well learn to love it in a different way. Also there is always one that needs a good home.

Yeah, that's what everyone keeps telling me. It's definitely a popular opinion. I think for me personally, it wouldn't be a healthy thing to go right out and get another cat. It wouldn't help me grieve; it would just make me push aside my feelings and not deal with them. I'm sure I'll get more pets eventually, but right now it wouldn't be good for me emotionally. And I don't think it would be fair to the new cat either. To each his own, I guess.

Why is that? Is it cos you would feel guilty getting another one right now? Somehow you might feel that you have betrayed your last cat? You have a lot of love to gave to an animal. And there is a lot of deserving cats out there that need another home. I would say that if you did get another one you should not feel guilty cos of that and it surely dose not take any of the love you held for your friend that has passed to the other side. It is at moments like this where a friendly feline makes us feel wonted. Also I think when you see the one that you would be giving such a loving home to am sure. Also sure that you would not gave any less love then he/she deserves. But of course you know your self better then I or anyone here.

Acutely cleo (Princess Cleocatra) has cats. She would be a good person to talk to about this. I know from being her friend how much she gets from her feline friends

 

[Bluey]

I totally understand where your coming from.

And you explained that amazingly. It is a bit like when you have not got over you ex ye.

Its no surprise that you get closer to your pets. I mean they do become apart of the family anyway and when your living alone even moor so they become close.

I do believe when we go from this world we go into a batter place. I don't believe in God as such but I do believe all this is for a reason even if I don't know what reason it is. So ye I well stop rambling here and say what I mean. I mean that I think we well one day be with the ones that we love and that includes our passed pets. I also think we well be able to communicate with them better then we did down here when the time comes for us to Jone them. I know all that sounds a bit soft but I really do think and hope that is true.

I would say you are a pretty special person Elaeagnus. The cat that you get well be a very lucky one I would say when you do deiced to have one

 

[Elaeagnus]

Thanks Bluey. That's sweet of you to say.

 

[Rawr!]

I have to say, this thread actually made me pretty sad. Brought back memories of helping my Grandpa bury his dog in the backyard. Pets are very much apart of us. Just thought I'd let ya know I can definately relate.

 

[blah_blah]

I love my pets if they died I'd be really sad too. You should get another pet, not to replace your old one. But just to have another furry friend around to love.