For Parents: What would you do if your child said they wanted to change genders

[Amthorn]

For those of you who have children, how would you react if your 12 year old, who has always acted as if they fit the normal behaviors for their own gender, came to you and said they wanted to change? What would you say?

 

[TheRealCallie]

I would say that's a big decision and while I support them no matter what, that it needs time to make sure that's what they want. IMO, 12 is too young to make a decision of that nature.
HOWEVER, I would support them, if they wanted to dress as the other gender around the house, but not in public all the time. ONLY because of other people and their judgmental bullshit. (applies only to judgmental people, not all people)

 

[SofiasMami]

I would probably talk to her and dig a little deeper by asking why. I guess every situation is different but I believe as a parent in keeping the lines of communication open. I'd like my kid to think she can come and talk to me about anything.

-Teresa

 

[Tiina63]

I have no children but agree with TheRealCallie. 12 is a bit young to make such a massive decision. At that age children often begin to question gender roles, how they feel about themselves, their sexuality etc and become confused and it is best to wait till they are a bit older and more sure of what they really want before deciding anything. Dressing as the other gender around the house is a good idea.

 

[h3donist]

I'd give them every bit of support they ever need and would defend them against the inevitable backlash that occurs in this scenario from the more "feeble minded" sections of society. I'd just want them to be happy and safe.

 

[chris girard]

I would do my best to supply them with the necessary surgery, or the money to have it done.

 

[Mouse]

I would be very supportive to the child, even discussing at length to ascertain it was not just a passing phase. I have a very gifted 12 year old girl in my charge and though she definitely isn't into changing genders, talks with quite some insight into a variety of subjects including sexuality. I've said that if I don't have an answer, then I'll find out and she's happy with that.

Most 12 year olds are experiencing all kinds of new changes in their bodies and in their feelings. Furthermore, they often feel misunderstood as they are struggling to leave behind their childhood and become teenagers and then finally, adults.

Ahead lies sibling rivalry, pressure from peers, issues such as rebellious behaviour and problems at school, and negative attitudes from others. Other girls her age have been highly critical of her being a 'know-all', stuff like that which angered me. I would set aside lots of time to listen to my charge. When she asks questions, deal with one question at a time. Mine suffers huge abandonment issues, so this is where I'm being assuring that I'm not going to leave her.