How to Aovid falling in love with a girl

[Lonelydriver]

I know the topic of thread is weird. I definitely have troubling not falling in love with a Indian girl at workplace. Here is a short story, Three of us ( a guy, me, the Indian girl) are interns in a company. We have a lot of fun joking around. I really like to tease the Indian girl . She catches and loves my sense of humor. The only reason i am doing this is because i am not a native English speaker. In order to blend with the group, I need to act funny to cheer up everyone. In a working situation, I work harder than anyone else. However, if we talk together ( Me, the guy, the girl), I can't really get into the conservation with them , mainly some language problems and the lack of social knowledge ( topics like clubbing and party schools stuff). I can feel that the Indian girls likes me because the way she acts to me. when i staring at her , she turns back. she said she likes cute Asian guys. she always laugh at me. She is kind of nervous when talking to me. So my conclusion is that on the scale of like 1-10, I would say she is on 6 to me. I am very confident that i can get her if i try. However, On the scale of like 1-10, i am 7 to her. I just think i am not ready to start a relationship because I don't have very strong English and social skills, but a sense of humor。 I don't really those thing are really matter. I can't say that i am not confident. but just not ready yet.

Here is advise I have for myself:
1.To meet more English speaking friends be more a social person, then hook up some English speaking girls

2. forget about her , no change, stick to my Asian Friends who speak all Chinese ( by the way, I love them, but I really want to have a new group of English speaking friends. I almost lost contact with my Asian friends because i moved to a new city. I just feel like it is a time to start something new )

 

[IgnoredOne]

Focus on the hideous imaginary wart she has. I hear that helps.

 

[friendlyheart]

I do believe it's better for you to get more English friends, i assume you moved to and English speaking country so if you did that move it would be nice to mingle with a different culture and work on your English a little bit as well.

As for the girl, the fact that your English is not awesome is really not an excuse not to date someone. And if she likes you, and if you can joke and flirt with her i don't see how you'd lack social knowledge, you don't have to be partying and clubbing in order to maintain a relationship with someone.

And to answer the first question of yours you can't. It's impossible to stop falling for someone. Falling in love with someone is rather magical, you don't choose who to fall in love with and you can't do much about it. It's like coming down with a cold But can be a lot better. It's up to you what you make out of it.

 

[Lonelydriver]

Thx for the suggestion. By the way , I have been in the U.S for 10 years. But I recently just want to change myself because of the new environment. Thx for your motivitation. I will try to be a English social person. For the Indian girl, I will give it a try

 

[PlayingSolo]

Maybe I'm missing something, but I'm not really seeing a problem here. You said she likes you. You said (i think) you like her. So why don't you want to fall in love? Just let it happen. Maybe explain to her the social/english difficulties you have. If she really likes you I think she'll understand.

 

[Lonelydriver]

I am assuming that she has an interest on me. Not sure whether or not she likes me. Maybe she thinks I am a little kid. This is all based my instinct. What I know is that she likes cute Asian guys. Is there a way I can see if she likes me ? Because I hate failure because of my misinterpretation

 

[friendlyheart]

Thx for the suggestion. By the way , I have been in the U.S for 10 years. But I recently just want to change myself because of the new environment. Thx for your motivitation. I will try to be a English social person. For the Indian girl, I will give it a try

Good, you know sometimes you just have to take the risk and hope for the ebst outcome. But in the end all that matters is that you try no matter what comes out of it. It's better to try and fail than never try and regret it

 

[kamya]

When will people realize that what they are feeling is not love. You are infatuated with this girl and maybe want to get closer to her but that's all. You are not in love with her. (maybe this is just a misunderstanding since you say you aren't a native english speaker.)

How to forget her? I have no help on that. =P Distract yourself with something else I guess.

 

[Lonelydriver]

Yea. I am not like in love. I am just infatuated with this girl( this is actually how I feel). I am like between love and infatuation. I am sure that i will not make out with her. It seems like most guys will want todo. But I only do that with girl i really like, not being the state of unclear love. sorry I have no experience with a English speaker girl.

 

[Blue_Eyed_Symphony]

Does this work for guys as well?

 

[Lonelydriver]

Does this work for guys as well?

What do you mean?

 

[Sailor Moon]

All my tips is not to fall in love with a Girl is to ask her to say some random weird stuff to turn you off?? Like say random jokes all the time...


like :::: for example ...dont look at her face and say:::


" On a crowded bus, a man noticed that another man had his eyes closed.
Surprised, he asked," What's the matter? Are you sick or something?"
"No, I'm okay. It's just that I hate to see old ladies standing."



Honestly though...Its hard not to not be attracted or charmed by someone.
It takes guts to just say to yourself...not now ..I cant fall for her right now in your head.


You need guts and faith in yourself

 

[Sarah_Lbnz]

Well, what helps me is to jog and do yoga, to get out all that energy that infatuation creates. I also write down a list of attributes about this person to see what it is I like about them (who they are). I also write down what I want and need in a potential partner. I compare these lists to my fantasies, which tend run rampant in the infatuation stage. I have to be logical like this because I'm one of those people who can get really caught up in that stage.