I've been up all night thinking about this shitty ass relationship I'm in, for those who dont know here's a little back ground (she's the girl that's coming back) http://www.alonelylife.com/heres-my-story-t-3149.html. Well, she came...after ditching twice, we fooled around a bunch and told each other we love each other again, she decided before she left to say that we we're "comitted" to each other. So that was about a month ago, since then not much has happened, she says she'll call and doesnt, she says she'll be back on msn then never comes back and this weekend even took 200 dollars from me which I sent to get her down here for gas...and didn't show up. I asked her the morning she was suppose to leave (on msn) why she hadn't left. She came up with an excuse saying she needed someone to watch her moms kids and her dog who's been really sick and almost dying. basically turned it into a pity party for her because she's dead broke since her last relationship with bills she can't afford. me being the sucker and I guess "sweet guy" I am said, it's okay, dont worry about today and even offered for her to keep the money and told her I'd send her 300 more for a vet bill. we talked some more and she said today...well I guess yesterday, whatever! sunday, would be better. she didn't say for sure that she would come sunday but I let it slide so we could talk about her money troubles and what I could to do help. eventually she told me wanted to go have a shower and she would be back, I made a point of saying "come back so we can come talk about when you're coming" she agrees she would. long story short...she didn't, I called, she didn't answer, she didnt' call back all saturday, or sunday. still haven't talked to her. I left her a messaged on her cell telling her how I feel and I can't take it anymore, that I dont deserve to be treated like this.
I just dont understand why I'm not good enough for any of these girls, with her I've been doing everything I possibly can to make her happy. I would talk about how much I worry about losing her, that bugged her, so I stopped. I would tell her how I wish we could talk more, she said that she's busy, so I stopped bringing that up. she complained that I called too late around 9 when she had to be up at 4:30, so I started calling earlier, she still didn't answer...she complained that I called too much because I called daily, so now I call her every 2 days at the most. all I do is offer her love and support and get none in return, even telling her I promise to make everything right with her money troubles so she could stop stressing and she's treated me like this.the fact of the matter is no matter what I do with any of the girls in my passed and now my present with her, I'm not good enough to be treated with respect, showed love to, or be treated the way I deserve to be. Like I said, I called and told her I cant put up with it, she still didn't call so I think I'm going to tell her it's over. I'm just very afraid because I love her so much, I dont feel like I'll ever find a girl so beautiful to be with, and to be completely honest..the sex was incredible. I dont want to be alone again, but I dont want to be treated like this either and I dont think she's going to change. I dunno...thanks for reading all that if you did.
I just dont understand why I'm not good enough for any of these girls, with her I've been doing everything I possibly can to make her happy. I would talk about how much I worry about losing her, that bugged her, so I stopped. I would tell her how I wish we could talk more, she said that she's busy, so I stopped bringing that up. she complained that I called too late around 9 when she had to be up at 4:30, so I started calling earlier, she still didn't answer...she complained that I called too much because I called daily, so now I call her every 2 days at the most. all I do is offer her love and support and get none in return, even telling her I promise to make everything right with her money troubles so she could stop stressing and she's treated me like this.the fact of the matter is no matter what I do with any of the girls in my passed and now my present with her, I'm not good enough to be treated with respect, showed love to, or be treated the way I deserve to be. Like I said, I called and told her I cant put up with it, she still didn't call so I think I'm going to tell her it's over. I'm just very afraid because I love her so much, I dont feel like I'll ever find a girl so beautiful to be with, and to be completely honest..the sex was incredible. I dont want to be alone again, but I dont want to be treated like this either and I dont think she's going to change. I dunno...thanks for reading all that if you did.
