Astral_Punisher
Well-known member
Newbie here, first thread, be nice .
Been in a long term relationship for 6 years - I'm now 26, and male.
My girlfriend and I have lived together for most of our relationship, but currently, we are in different locations as I study to enter the trades (good work, good pay - can support a family, etc.). It is during this period that I have thought about how I don't really miss her (or anyone for that matter).
I have often felt like I have little in common with her, although she is generally nice to me, and is popular with others in her social circle. She is a generally good person.
We hardly do anything together, as we share very few common interests. She also seems to have a very short attention span whenever I start to talk. I tend to read books, and listen to her much of the time.
Please note that I have never, ever really felt attached to anyone, not family, not friends. I wouldn't call anyone I know 'friends' of mine, and even in the forced social interaction groups that I put myself into to reduce my ineptitude with others, I really don't care about any of them.
The only people I've shed tears for is my cat.
So, I guess you could say I do not 'love' my girlfriend, at least in the way I suppose most people measure 'love'.
We do have sex - it is satisfying, but really, I feel hollow about the entire thing. I wish I could simply shut off that part of myself, so I didn't need the release at all. That would be awesome. *sigh*
What should I do?
1. Should I stay with her, in this numbness, and share with her the same numbness I feel with everyone around me? This means getting married, kids, house with picket fence. She has informed me that this arrangement would satisfy her wants, and make her happy.
2. Should I leave her, allowing me to find someone that warms the cackles of my heart (if at all possible), and allowing her to find someone that truly loves her in the traditional sense?
3. Should I just suck it up, and try to dig deep, and find some reason to stay with her, even though I find her unsatisfactory in nearly every non-sexual way? Should I force myself to 'love' her?
P.S. - I do realize that my numbness is a huge issue, and mine alone (not her problem). But I have no idea what to do. I've always been a very cold person. And really, do I want to start caring about people now? It seems like a lot of people are stressed and emotionally compromised by such feelings.
P.P.S. - The entire reason of this thread is because I have read so much of other members, and how they seem to have such happiness. I guess I am jealous.
Thank you for looking at my thread.
Been in a long term relationship for 6 years - I'm now 26, and male.
My girlfriend and I have lived together for most of our relationship, but currently, we are in different locations as I study to enter the trades (good work, good pay - can support a family, etc.). It is during this period that I have thought about how I don't really miss her (or anyone for that matter).
I have often felt like I have little in common with her, although she is generally nice to me, and is popular with others in her social circle. She is a generally good person.
We hardly do anything together, as we share very few common interests. She also seems to have a very short attention span whenever I start to talk. I tend to read books, and listen to her much of the time.
Please note that I have never, ever really felt attached to anyone, not family, not friends. I wouldn't call anyone I know 'friends' of mine, and even in the forced social interaction groups that I put myself into to reduce my ineptitude with others, I really don't care about any of them.
The only people I've shed tears for is my cat.
So, I guess you could say I do not 'love' my girlfriend, at least in the way I suppose most people measure 'love'.
We do have sex - it is satisfying, but really, I feel hollow about the entire thing. I wish I could simply shut off that part of myself, so I didn't need the release at all. That would be awesome. *sigh*
What should I do?
1. Should I stay with her, in this numbness, and share with her the same numbness I feel with everyone around me? This means getting married, kids, house with picket fence. She has informed me that this arrangement would satisfy her wants, and make her happy.
2. Should I leave her, allowing me to find someone that warms the cackles of my heart (if at all possible), and allowing her to find someone that truly loves her in the traditional sense?
3. Should I just suck it up, and try to dig deep, and find some reason to stay with her, even though I find her unsatisfactory in nearly every non-sexual way? Should I force myself to 'love' her?
P.S. - I do realize that my numbness is a huge issue, and mine alone (not her problem). But I have no idea what to do. I've always been a very cold person. And really, do I want to start caring about people now? It seems like a lot of people are stressed and emotionally compromised by such feelings.
P.P.S. - The entire reason of this thread is because I have read so much of other members, and how they seem to have such happiness. I guess I am jealous.
Thank you for looking at my thread.