Blueforge88
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- Jun 16, 2015
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So, I have this friend who has just ended a two year relationship with her boyfriend. They met near a base in my state after, he just got out of the military and they dated a few weeks before, he flew back to his home state. While, she was happy to have a boyfriend, some of her friends and family, warned her about having a long distance relationship. However, she was determined to make it work, and as far as I knew things went well the first year.
While they had both planned to visit each other, neither of them could afford to fly and see each other. After the second year is when things started to change. She would call me to vent about a change in his behavior: Choosing Video games over talking with her via phone/skype , his family badmouthing her, and of course her feelings of loneliness. This continued until she met another guy down here and started hanging out with him. I could tell she was lonely and wanted attention and the "new guy" was on the rebound. It was a recipe for disaster.
Slowly but, surely my concerns started manifesting. Her Boyfriend neglected her for months before, finally coming out about his new girlfriend he met in his state. She then resorted to spending days over the new guys house. Eventually, they broke up and I didnt see much of her partially, because she spent days over the new guy's place.
Now, I get a phone call from her expressing regret and guilt. I do my best to not be the 'I told you so' person, I try to be supportive but, at times my usual answer is "What did you expect"? I've been doing what I cant to be supportive and listen but, it feels like she wants an answer or reassure her that her actions were justified or ok.
Personally, I don't feel Long Distance Relationships are worth it. At least not for an allotted amount of time. In this case, two people when two years without, physically seeing each other. I think the reasons these relationships are difficult are because: some people need a close physical/emotional relationship. In a long distance relationship its easy for: One or both persons to get bored or lonely after being separated for so long.
Has anyone had a successful or non successful Long Distance relationship? How did you handle it?
While they had both planned to visit each other, neither of them could afford to fly and see each other. After the second year is when things started to change. She would call me to vent about a change in his behavior: Choosing Video games over talking with her via phone/skype , his family badmouthing her, and of course her feelings of loneliness. This continued until she met another guy down here and started hanging out with him. I could tell she was lonely and wanted attention and the "new guy" was on the rebound. It was a recipe for disaster.
Slowly but, surely my concerns started manifesting. Her Boyfriend neglected her for months before, finally coming out about his new girlfriend he met in his state. She then resorted to spending days over the new guys house. Eventually, they broke up and I didnt see much of her partially, because she spent days over the new guy's place.
Now, I get a phone call from her expressing regret and guilt. I do my best to not be the 'I told you so' person, I try to be supportive but, at times my usual answer is "What did you expect"? I've been doing what I cant to be supportive and listen but, it feels like she wants an answer or reassure her that her actions were justified or ok.
Personally, I don't feel Long Distance Relationships are worth it. At least not for an allotted amount of time. In this case, two people when two years without, physically seeing each other. I think the reasons these relationships are difficult are because: some people need a close physical/emotional relationship. In a long distance relationship its easy for: One or both persons to get bored or lonely after being separated for so long.
Has anyone had a successful or non successful Long Distance relationship? How did you handle it?