whocares
Well-known member
Hello Everyone,
Just felt like typin' some stuff up in regards to where I'm at in life. Not really sure what the point of this is BUT I just felt like typing, so enjoy the read
I'll be a senior next year in college. My 3 years of college, so far, have been NOTHING like i thought they'd be. I've made 0 friends and haven't been too active socially. However, on the other hand I've gained some muscle (enough for other people to comment on it), tried my hand at stand up comedy 8 times (my dream in life is to be a comedian), and I've gained perspective on life. Overall I'd give my self about an 80% if that makes sense. I'm GENERALLY satisfied with my self but I always feel like I'm missing something
I've NEVER been good with girls, EVER. My freshman year myself and a friend of mine decided to make an effort to get better. We started going around campus and talking to girls. I got phone numbers, I went on dates, even had sex once. BUT NEVER have I had a girl-friend. I guess I've become pretty bitter about it. I try to remain optimistic but it's hard. This past summer I decided to try and approach 100 different girls. I only made it to about 31-32 because my spirit was pretty much broken at that point. I got 5 numbers and none of them resulted in anything.
I met one girl at Kroger. I told her I thought she was cute and asked for her number. We talked for a couple minutes and I asked her if she wanted to go to our school's baseball game on Saturday. She seemed excited and said yes. Although, when I called her she acted TOTALLY different and said she was 'busy'. I tried texting her later and got no response.
What's wrong with me? I'm a tall, dark haired, good looking guy. I'm not a social reject or anything like that either. I've been described by some as a "jock". I grew up as a shy kid but feel as if I've gotten over that. I mean I always participate in class conversations and am quite good at giving speeches. I guess I just want to fall in love. I want to experience what love feels like. I've got a buddy back home who's as SHY as SHY can be, I love the guy but it's true, and even he's managed to get a girl. She broke up with him this past summer BUT STILL! Why have I not had any luck in this area of my life? It gets down right depressing after a while. I mean am i cursed or what?!
I've got one more year of college left and I'm pleased with the major I've chosen. I've always been interested in Government and my degree is geared towards public administration. I would absolutely LOVE to work in Washington D.C. after college but I know it might be difficult to get a job there right away. I've got a huge decision to make to. If I truly want to pursue the path of a stand up comedian (something that I think I could truly become great at, and I say that modestly) I would move to Chicago or I can try and go to D.C., something I would also like.
Also, I’ve really put my religion on the back burner, which makes me a bit depressed as well. I grew up in the Christian faith and earlier this year was praying to God every single night to help me through this lonely time in my life. I would talk to him for 15-20 minutes at a time and ask for help. However after a while I just thought “the hell with this”. I felt as if he hadn’t answered any of my prayers so therefore I did not need him. This past year I’ve gotten good grades, done stand up comedy, and added muscle all without his help. It makes me sad though. I wish I could believe in him like I did when I was a kid, but at the same time I feel like there’s just too much bad honeysuckle in life for God to exist. Idk, very confused about religion right now.
Again, overall I'm about 80% pleased with my life. I just hope things get better after college, socially. It's not like I've done nothing socially at college. I've been to parties, got asked to join a frat, have hung out with a couple dudes for a while BUT haven't made any close friends. Although I do know what it's like to have close guy friends. I made a post on this site earlier about that very subject. I've got guys that I call my brothers because that's how close we are. I've cried with these guys. My point is I know what a true friend is. Therefore I don't feel like a social failure. It's just I never thought my college years would be sooo lonely. It's been...rough.
I'm somewhat optimistic about the fall because I've signed a lease with a guy who seems pretty cool. He's OBSESSED with sports just like I am : ), a senior too, etc. So hopefully we get along ok. Idk though, I've learned that you really never know what life has in store for you.
Thanks for reading. Comments are MORE than welcome.
Just felt like typin' some stuff up in regards to where I'm at in life. Not really sure what the point of this is BUT I just felt like typing, so enjoy the read
I'll be a senior next year in college. My 3 years of college, so far, have been NOTHING like i thought they'd be. I've made 0 friends and haven't been too active socially. However, on the other hand I've gained some muscle (enough for other people to comment on it), tried my hand at stand up comedy 8 times (my dream in life is to be a comedian), and I've gained perspective on life. Overall I'd give my self about an 80% if that makes sense. I'm GENERALLY satisfied with my self but I always feel like I'm missing something
I've NEVER been good with girls, EVER. My freshman year myself and a friend of mine decided to make an effort to get better. We started going around campus and talking to girls. I got phone numbers, I went on dates, even had sex once. BUT NEVER have I had a girl-friend. I guess I've become pretty bitter about it. I try to remain optimistic but it's hard. This past summer I decided to try and approach 100 different girls. I only made it to about 31-32 because my spirit was pretty much broken at that point. I got 5 numbers and none of them resulted in anything.
I met one girl at Kroger. I told her I thought she was cute and asked for her number. We talked for a couple minutes and I asked her if she wanted to go to our school's baseball game on Saturday. She seemed excited and said yes. Although, when I called her she acted TOTALLY different and said she was 'busy'. I tried texting her later and got no response.
What's wrong with me? I'm a tall, dark haired, good looking guy. I'm not a social reject or anything like that either. I've been described by some as a "jock". I grew up as a shy kid but feel as if I've gotten over that. I mean I always participate in class conversations and am quite good at giving speeches. I guess I just want to fall in love. I want to experience what love feels like. I've got a buddy back home who's as SHY as SHY can be, I love the guy but it's true, and even he's managed to get a girl. She broke up with him this past summer BUT STILL! Why have I not had any luck in this area of my life? It gets down right depressing after a while. I mean am i cursed or what?!
I've got one more year of college left and I'm pleased with the major I've chosen. I've always been interested in Government and my degree is geared towards public administration. I would absolutely LOVE to work in Washington D.C. after college but I know it might be difficult to get a job there right away. I've got a huge decision to make to. If I truly want to pursue the path of a stand up comedian (something that I think I could truly become great at, and I say that modestly) I would move to Chicago or I can try and go to D.C., something I would also like.
Also, I’ve really put my religion on the back burner, which makes me a bit depressed as well. I grew up in the Christian faith and earlier this year was praying to God every single night to help me through this lonely time in my life. I would talk to him for 15-20 minutes at a time and ask for help. However after a while I just thought “the hell with this”. I felt as if he hadn’t answered any of my prayers so therefore I did not need him. This past year I’ve gotten good grades, done stand up comedy, and added muscle all without his help. It makes me sad though. I wish I could believe in him like I did when I was a kid, but at the same time I feel like there’s just too much bad honeysuckle in life for God to exist. Idk, very confused about religion right now.
Again, overall I'm about 80% pleased with my life. I just hope things get better after college, socially. It's not like I've done nothing socially at college. I've been to parties, got asked to join a frat, have hung out with a couple dudes for a while BUT haven't made any close friends. Although I do know what it's like to have close guy friends. I made a post on this site earlier about that very subject. I've got guys that I call my brothers because that's how close we are. I've cried with these guys. My point is I know what a true friend is. Therefore I don't feel like a social failure. It's just I never thought my college years would be sooo lonely. It's been...rough.
I'm somewhat optimistic about the fall because I've signed a lease with a guy who seems pretty cool. He's OBSESSED with sports just like I am : ), a senior too, etc. So hopefully we get along ok. Idk though, I've learned that you really never know what life has in store for you.
Thanks for reading. Comments are MORE than welcome.