Small town outcast

[edgeofnowhere]

I live in a small village of approximately 400. I have friends, but I haven't really heard from any of them in a long time. I spend my weekends alone, or doing favors for my parents. I plan tonight to go the local bar alone and maybe find somebody who will talk to me. I think there's a general consensus around town that I'm a loser and to be avoided, even though I have a real career, I own my own home, I drive a decent vehicle; all those things that really shouldn't matter when judging a person, but unfortuneatly do.

I try hard to be a decent likeable person, and I maybe don't try hard enough to keep friends, but I feel all alone with nobody to talk to. What can I do to improve my situation? At this point, moving isn't really an option, but I do not want to stay here forever by any means.

 

[kaede]

Is your town within reasonably close driving distance to a larger town or city? If so maybe you can try doing things there, without having to move?

 

[edgeofnowhere]

Yes, but there is not much to do in the bigger surrounding towns either. Bars are out of the question if I'm driving, and usually everything else is closed by 9 oclock. I don't know where to begin...

 

[kaede]

Yeah the bar thing is not gonna work if you're driving to a different town/city, but I guess I was thinking more of things you've probably already thought of/heard before like: take a class, join a different gym, volunteer somewhere, etc...

Truthfully though I feel like people overall are less sociable in real life because I really think that once you're working full time most people just drive from home to work, and back home again. With some errands thrown in now and then. But mostly it's just people go home and go online. Everyone just seems so busy and so much on the "hamster wheel" of life that it's hard to meet people in real life. That's kind of my experience anyway!

 

[cumulus.james]

I live in a small village of approximately 400. I have friends, but I haven't really heard from any of them in a long time. I spend my weekends alone, or doing favors for my parents. I plan tonight to go the local bar alone and maybe find somebody who will talk to me. I think there's a general consensus around town that I'm a loser and to be avoided, even though I have a real career, I own my own home, I drive a decent vehicle; all those things that really shouldn't matter when judging a person, but unfortuneatly do.

I try hard to be a decent likeable person, and I maybe don't try hard enough to keep friends, but I feel all alone with nobody to talk to. What can I do to improve my situation? At this point, moving isn't really an option, but I do not want to stay here forever by any means.

I have lived in the same small village most my life and still don’t know anyone! It's cool that you can go to the bar on your own I would love to be able to do that but over here people think your a freak if your on your own. I'm assuming your from America? Am I right in thinking you can go out for a meal on your own over there? I would love to be able to do that.

 

[BUFFALOBT]

How old are you edge? I have some thoughts but I'd like to learn a bit more about your upbringing first...if you don't mind sharing.

Feel free to send me a private message...thanks.

 

[AFrozenSoul]

You need to pretend you are happier than you are. People go out to bars to have fun. If they are having fun, and you are not their fun will go soft and they do not want that.

Also if you are at a bar that doesn't mean you have to drink. You want a great way to get people interested in you. Show your are willing to be a DD. If people have a problem with that then they can die in their Drunk Driving accidents.

If you cannot escape from the town. Then show them they are wrong.

 

[edgeofnowhere]

I live in a small village of approximately 400. I have friends, but I haven't really heard from any of them in a long time. I spend my weekends alone, or doing favors for my parents. I plan tonight to go the local bar alone and maybe find somebody who will talk to me. I think there's a general consensus around town that I'm a loser and to be avoided, even though I have a real career, I own my own home, I drive a decent vehicle; all those things that really shouldn't matter when judging a person, but unfortuneatly do.

I try hard to be a decent likeable person, and I maybe don't try hard enough to keep friends, but I feel all alone with nobody to talk to. What can I do to improve my situation? At this point, moving isn't really an option, but I do not want to stay here forever by any means.

I have lived in the same small village most my life and still don’t know anyone! It's cool that you can go to the bar on your own I would love to be able to do that but over here people think your a freak if your on your own. I'm assuming your from America? Am I right in thinking you can go out for a meal on your own over there? I would love to be able to do that.

I'm from Canada, actually. And, no, people still think you're a freak if you dine alone in a decent restaurant. Going to the bar alone is definately out of my comfort zone but I tried it on Saturday night. The place was dead, with about 5 or 6 middle aged ladies having some drinks at one table, and another table with a couple of couples whom I did not know. After scanning the crowd, or the lack thereof, I bought a case of beer and left. (small town bars around here can sell beer and cigarettes over the counter.)

It's hard not having any friends. It's harder when you live in a desolate bowl of a place where nobody wants to be.

 

[alonewanderer]

It's time for you to move. /Nuff said, GTFO of that location and lead a normal life.

 

[Sci-Fi]

Funny (not ha ha funny but just funny) that even a small town of 400 still has a local bar. LOL

You definitely need a change, especially living in small towns here that can...for lack of a better word...kill you. Larger cities are over rated though, there might be more to do and more people but the bigger the city the more lonely you can feel. Our population here fluctuates quite a bit, in summer it swells and there are always festivals and stuff going on.