Story of a disgusting human.

[randomdude]

Male with wide hips, fit legs and more than narrow muscular shoulders isn't a man it's a disgrace of all males on this planet this is the main reason i hate myself. I ruined my body shape by sitting on a chair gaming 10 hours daily while my body grew the most. It's not that i didn't want to go out more but every friend i had than deserted me because cool kids were against me, i was all alone gaming myself out of that problem. As soon as i hit 14 people started proving their dominance over me because i couldn't hide my fears and anxiety breaks me, so many times i had to fight and luckily adrenaline guided me and every single time i stand my ground and kick attackers ass except one time, but every time i fought i get traumatized and in next months i can't feel emotions or any other feelings. As much as i got bullied that much i got interested in mma and my admiration for Spartans and Gladiators grew. At 17 birthday i stopped going to high school because i lost interests and went to gym in order to forge my new body and follow my dream of becoming a man powerful beyond measures physically and mentally. Little before i joined gym i started visiting therapists so i can work on my mental part. Every single day i barely go to gym and i hope for changes but i am still a sad *removed* and a *removed* it takes one random guy to look at me and i feel bad. I am afraid to confront anyone about anything, how will i defend my sister and my family? Only thing that keeps me alive is that i don't want my family suffering over my suicide and i don't want bullies to succeed but i also can't move on with my body and anxiety level i am sick of it. I've made some good friends that i am never anxious or bad being with but that's not enough to keep me happy. For almost 2 years of gym time i never made any friend in gym. Only thing that keeps me training is i don't want to break my promise to myself even though results are minimal. Ectomorph upper body and legs and endomorph wide hips and stomach, thunderbolt hit me please!​

 

[Sci-Fi]

First of all, watch the language you use, some find certain words extremely offensive and so I removed them.

Second of all, stop with the self pity. You are never going to get anywhere if you keep beating yourself up all the time.

Third, the measure of a man is NOT how muscular he is or how many people he can beat up. It is in how he treats other people and himself. If you want to workout and get into shape because it will make you happy then do it. If you are doing it because you think it will fix everything and you can beat up whomever you want, then you are doing it for the wrong reasons.

Also I don't see a disgusting human being, what I see is a man who has spent so much energy and time into beating himself up, and trying to live up to an ideal, he's lost sight of who he really is. Spartans and Gladiators only exist in TV and movies now.

 

[randomdude]

First of all, watch the language you use, some find certain words extremely offensive and so I removed them.

Second of all, stop with the self pity. You are never going to get anywhere if you keep beating yourself up all the time.

Third, the measure of a man is NOT how muscular he is or how many people he can beat up. It is in how he treats other people and himself. If you want to workout and get into shape because it will make you happy then do it. If you are doing it because you think it will fix everything and you can beat up whomever you want, then you are doing it for the wrong reasons.

Also I don't see a disgusting human being, what I see is a man who has spent so much energy and time into beating himself up, and trying to live up to an ideal, he's lost sight of who he really is. Spartans and Gladiators only exist in TV and movies now.

Sorry for bad words whole post was created from bad emotions. Main reason i lift is because i want confidence, power i mentioned is what i see as being able to believe in myself. I don't wanna fight, all i want is to get more confident and stop looking as an easy target for everyone. Many other things exist only on TV now too but if people could train like mad in ancients times what excuse do i have.

 

[MTrip]

The gladiators of imperial Rome were professional athletes. You are measuring yourself against a standard that has nothing to do with you. Those guys were fed & housed by others, & had gyms to train in at public expense or paid for by wealthy benefactors. If you live at home with your folks then they pay for it, but for most adults these days, that support system that professional athletes have is not attainable.

Physical fitness is great. But practice it for the right reasons, man.

 

[jaguarundi]

Gladiators were also often criminals or captured foreign soldiers who were in essence, slaves and had no choice in the matter, having to compete in 'games' for the amusement of a savage crowd.

Don't be having a romantic ideal of what you or anyone else 'should' look like. Keeping fit is great, becoming completely obsessed with it makes for a trivial and boring person.

 

[panfruit]

Male with wide hips, fit legs and more than narrow muscular shoulders isn't a man it's a disgrace of all males on this planet this is the main reason i hate myself. I ruined my body shape by sitting on a chair gaming 10 hours daily while my body grew the most. It's not that i didn't want to go out more but every friend i had than deserted me because cool kids were against me, i was all alone gaming myself out of that problem. As soon as i hit 14 people started proving their dominance over me because i couldn't hide my fears and anxiety breaks me, so many times i had to fight and luckily adrenaline guided me and every single time i stand my ground and kick attackers ass except one time, but every time i fought i get traumatized and in next months i can't feel emotions or any other feelings. As much as i got bullied that much i got interested in mma and my admiration for Spartans and Gladiators grew. At 17 birthday i stopped going to high school because i lost interests and went to gym in order to forge my new body and follow my dream of becoming a man powerful beyond measures physically and mentally. Little before i joined gym i started visiting therapists so i can work on my mental part. Every single day i barely go to gym and i hope for changes but i am still a sad *removed* and a *removed* it takes one random guy to look at me and i feel bad. I am afraid to confront anyone about anything, how will i defend my sister and my family? Only thing that keeps me alive is that i don't want my family suffering over my suicide and i don't want bullies to succeed but i also can't move on with my body and anxiety level i am sick of it. I've made some good friends that i am never anxious or bad being with but that's not enough to keep me happy. For almost 2 years of gym time i never made any friend in gym. Only thing that keeps me training is i don't want to break my promise to myself even though results are minimal. Ectomorph upper body and legs and endomorph wide hips and stomach, thunderbolt hit me please!​

"so many times i had to fight and luckily adrenaline guided me and every single time i stand my ground and kick attackers ass except one time"

So basically you admit you kick ass most of the time, yes? That's a plus you should be proud of.

"I ruined my body shape by sitting on a chair gaming 10 hours daily while my body grew the most."

That's not why your body is like it is. That's not even possible, I don't think. It's likely hereditary. From your description it sounds sort of like eunuchoidal. No hypogonadism or extraneous X chromosomes? Hypogonadism *could* account for 'minimal results', making it more difficult to build and keep muscle on. No matter how hard I worked out when i was younger could I build muscle, only tone. It was frustrating.

That body shape is not that unusual, really. I *wish* I had narrow hips. I hated my self all through high school for sure, and even up into my mid-20s about that. Even now at 35 I am jealous of guys with narrow hips. I've come to accept my wide hips and chicken legs, even come to love my body.