As a college sophomore, I find that the idea of me not having any friends and being pretty inactive can be unsettling to others. In all honesty, I personally don't have a problem with the act of being alone, but at the same time I don't want to completely alienate others. What makes me depressed is the feeling that others are judging me. My life typically consists of studying, watching TV, taking walks, and listening to music, by myself. It may be boring to most, but I enjoy being alone and am at peace with my lifestyle... I may not have many exciting highs, but I generally don't have many extreme lows... until I have to actually talk about my life with other people. Whenever I talk to a family member or a dorm-mate, it's inevitable to be asked something along the lines of "what did you do today?" When I answer with basically "nothing," I can't help but feel they feel sorry for me or think I'm weird, which makes me depressed and feel even less inclined to interact with people than I already do. I mean, I don't really care if no one wants to be my bff, but I just don't want to look like a loser to the world. Am I over-thinking the impact of these small conversations or should I accept that on the outside, maybe I just am a "loser."
Talking about your social life (or lack thereof) with other people.
- Thread starter JML
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You are are caring to much about what others think of you. Disregard them and acquire currency. But try not to look to up yourself in the process.
Right now they probably see you as "The weird one" but if you don't give a - to them they will see you as "Stuck up snob", Seriously you can't win. So stop trying. You like to be alone right? Then why does it matter what some college students think of you. They not important they nobodies you probably never see them after college. Stop caring.
Right now they probably see you as "The weird one" but if you don't give a - to them they will see you as "Stuck up snob", Seriously you can't win. So stop trying. You like to be alone right? Then why does it matter what some college students think of you. They not important they nobodies you probably never see them after college. Stop caring.
oliphila07
Member
The description you made is exactly the life I am leading. I have also been thinking a bit about how pathetic that seems to others. When I see the others around, talking, eating together, I can't help thinking that I must have something wrong. But ultimately I think maybe this is better this way. After all, life is just something personal. So many people realise too late that they have missed many things because, at the time of university, they didn't take the time to make projects involving their own person. So maybe the good side of solitude is getting to know oneself better and leaving all this honeysuckle of appearances and of shallow and pointless conversations behind us. And a little tip. When I really feel lame about the life I lead, I read Thoreau, his chapter in Walden about solitude. And I also think about all these amazing writers and musicians who didn't care about the conventional life people should have. We are in a free world and there is nothing pathetic about being real and authentic even if that leads to solitude.
LaughingLover
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I think I'm a bit like you, JML. I lead a pretty quiet life, too: I walk to school, I come home, I spend the rest of my afternoon reading or watching some weird movie on Netflix, and then it's homework and bed, every day. But I live on my own, so no one really notices my reclusive, hermit-like habits. There's a lot more social pressure when you live in the dorm. It must be tough! 
It is pretty weird for people our age, though, isn't it? I mean, most people spend their college years screwing around and going to parties and… well, interacting with each other. But for me, social situations just stress me out. I rarely seek them out of my own accord, and when I do spend time with other people, I need a couple days to recharge before I'm ready to tackle the world again. That's just how I roll. There's nothing wrong with it, really… but it's definitely different.
If it really bothers you, I suppose you could always strike out into the world and find something to do that you think is worth talking about. It wouldn't even have to be social, would it? So long as you could make a story of it…
It is pretty weird for people our age, though, isn't it? I mean, most people spend their college years screwing around and going to parties and… well, interacting with each other. But for me, social situations just stress me out. I rarely seek them out of my own accord, and when I do spend time with other people, I need a couple days to recharge before I'm ready to tackle the world again. That's just how I roll. There's nothing wrong with it, really… but it's definitely different.
If it really bothers you, I suppose you could always strike out into the world and find something to do that you think is worth talking about. It wouldn't even have to be social, would it? So long as you could make a story of it…
The Lonely One
Active member
I don't know if I'm someone good enough to reply in this situation, but just be yourself and too be honest the people around do not really notice. I am a sophomore in college and you quickly learn how fast people forget or either don't care.
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JML said:
I felt the same way. Eventually i changed my response from "nothing" to "nothing exciting" leaving open the possibility that i did do something during the day even if it wasn't worth mentioning. That resulted in people occasionally responding about how their day had no note worthy events either. I came to see that if people sometimes felt that their day was as void of excitement and accomplishments as i felt mine was, then by asking "what did you do today" they were just talking and not really expecting that i have some exciting tale to relate.
Bluey
Well-known member
I think maybe you are over thinking it.
What I do sometimes is just say you know Ive had the most boring day in the world lol
Then I just ramble on about nonsense
You have to learn the art of rambling
What really trips me up though is when someone asks what I do for a living. I say nothing. That's really a conversation stopper.
But yes I understand what your saying. when you haven't done much apart from what you said you have done. The same as most of us here I think. But not interesting enough to say ye Ive been listening to music and watching a film lol.
This. I concur, Make that +2
What I do sometimes is just say you know Ive had the most boring day in the world lol
Then I just ramble on about nonsense
You have to learn the art of rambling
What really trips me up though is when someone asks what I do for a living. I say nothing. That's really a conversation stopper.
But yes I understand what your saying. when you haven't done much apart from what you said you have done. The same as most of us here I think. But not interesting enough to say ye Ive been listening to music and watching a film lol.
dead said:
This. I concur, Make that +2
