Tricked and manipulated

[Rocketdock1001]

today i passed a test that made me able to go to a gymasion, i am ( was ) incredibly happy. I found that speciel someone everyone has. and i spent some time with her. Since i go on a boarding school and having to meet at 8am i had to spend the night at home. Finding out she has been looking for me and was quite angry at the meantime, she thinks noone is telling her anything ( and anything is anything not my love thats for sure ) and when it turned evening and i wanted to talk to her but couldent since, she was in a conversation at the time. I observed the people playing billiard instead. Often she dosent want to talk or she thinks i have to make some move. Like her friend who is a ( mean curse words here ). And i feel im being used here. She wont talk to me only if i break the ice and try to make a conversation with her. She cares that im gone but she wont talk to me and BE WITH me not chit chat and then going away. This is not going to work. And from i wont show anymore interest. I put energy in her and i f****** demand something in return. Mabey somthing will happen when goto gym. When is it my turn to be loved. When i give so much energy and love to the people i care and love. I was so happy today. Now she made day like any other. A gram of happy and a ton of sadness disguised as a smile. Sometimes i hate life and love. And my teacher ( but thats not relevant)

 

[Astral_Punisher]

Wow.

You have alot of emotion in there.

I would take a step (or three) back, and examine your priorities.
What really matters to you?
Focus on getting yourself on stable, solid ground.
Back away from the negative people in your life, and go to people that you know you can trust (Family, long-term friends).

If your life is making you sad, I would suggest you take some small steps to change it.

I wish you the best of luck.

(In the future, please break up your posts into paragraphs for easier reading. Thank you.)

 

[MadMonkè]

hey bro.
girls are shy. if she makes you happy... then that means unconsciously, you like being used by her
chill out.. it should get easier once you break the ice enough times...
then... you wont be able to shut her up.

 

[crowtching tiger]

*Hands you a bottle of Jack Daniel's*

*Pats you on the back*